Archive for the 'Vienna sausages' Category

Par-tay (with the Sex Bloggers)

Published on November 7, 2009 in Uncategorized, Vienna sausages, blog, blogs, sex work awareness, slut and snark. 5 Comments

Wow. The NY Sex Blogger Calendar party was packed! (Have you gotten your calendar yet? I got mine!) I got to meet a load of people – probably too many to list. I’ve given shout outs to many on twitter. I know I forgot a few people, and I apologize. I hate to leave anyone out! Diva and Tess did a fabulous job putting this party together. I’m happy to say I helped out a bit with raffle tickets and the raffle table. However, I didn’t win a single thing in the raffle. *sigh* There was a lot of stuff I’d wanted too (Njoy Eleven, For Your Nymphomation Rolling Toy Trunk, Lelo Gigi – I will keep praying to the gods of sex toys for these things). Hopefully a lot of money was raised for Sex Work Awareness. I have to remind myself that my raffle tickets were purchased to support a good cause.

It was really neat to know so many people this year – I didn’t know nearly as many last year when I went to the party. It’s much more fun when you know people, and a few people introduced themselves to me after seeing my name tag and my “I’m a librarian, bitch!” button. There were plenty of friendly people I chatted briefly with who I didn’t know (and didn’t know me). I ran into two people (just two!) who I’ve had sex with – one man and one woman. I suppose since MasterDoc was there that makes it three people I’ve slept with who attended the party. You’d think in a room full of sluts I’d have had more!

I looked great if I do say so myself. I wore a black dress that’s draped in the front (so that my breasts really stand out) and I put the leather bondage waist cincher I bought at Floating World over it. Rowr. Much more comfortable than I thought it might be. I was smart and wore flats. My new heels would have looked wonderful, but knowing how I felt about them the weekend before, I would have been miserable in those things. I went for cleavage not only because it’s an asset I like to play up, but also because I knew there would be lots of other cleavage to compete with. My one sartorial complaint? Fishnet stockings turn into toe bondage in short order. My poor toes were tangled all night.

The only minor blip was that I saw the douchenozzle who sexually assaulted me in 2005. It was the first time since the assault that I’ve seen him and I feared for years how I would react. But you know, I didn’t feel much of anything. Perhaps some glee that the bastard has lost A LOT of hair (particularly obvious when seen from above in the loft area, I mean, the man is balding.). But the feared reactions:  either anxiety, depression, fear or unbridled rage that propels me to strangle the dickhead did not happen. Hallelujah! It’s like a big bugaboo in my anxiety closet has been eliminated. It’s been another step in healing and moving on. Anyway, in honor of my wonderfully neutral reaction to seeing him, here’s the (humorous) song I thought of when I spotted him. (It’s the title that’s most apropos.)

MasterDoc was there with me and despite both of us not being fond of crowds we had a decent time. (It helped that mid-party we left and got food at the dumpling place down the block.) Unfortunately I left without saying good bye to people. But my blogger pals, please know I was thrilled to meet you! I got to have Butchtastic Kyle‘s face smooshed into my boobs, and great hugs from Roxy, Bad Bad Girl, Dangerous Lilly. Roxy and Kyle were all over each other as you would expect. Mina Meow looked fab in a tux with corset early in the evening and a dress later. Her girlfriend A Secret Freak was there as well. (Writing this up makes me realize how out of date my blog roll is compared to the blogs in my reader. I will fix this soon.) I only wish that every sex blogger I know could have been there for me to meet.

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As an aside, MasterDoc asked me not to post the bits I put into the Wishing Box. He pointed out that that might be construed as topping from the bottom if expectations are put on what I put in there. It’s ongoing that I will put ideas in the box, and as the Dom he will decide when, where and if we do them. (And to be honest, I’m happy with it being that way.)

This afternoon when I woke up from my nap he got me. As I walked into the living room he picked up the box and said, “Let’s pick one from the box. Let’s see, what did we get? Oh yes, ‘please use the Vienna sausages.’”

Doh! He’s a sadistic man. He rigged the box, as I definitely did NOT put that in there. We laughed pretty hard. The chicken Vienna sausages sit on the living room table as a threat, but for now, he’s not done anything with them. (And I’m too well behaved a sub to hide them.)

Funnelicious

Published on September 10, 2009 in D/s, Uncategorized, Vienna sausages, anal, bdsm, kink, masochism, masturbation, orgasm denial, piss play, porn, sex and sex toys. 1 Comment

The title of this post came from MasterDoc. It came out of a bit of a mind fuck he enjoyed last night. We were getting ready to get down and dirty in the bedroom, and he wandered off into the kitchen. I met him in the hallway, and he held up a small plastic funnel, with a naughty gleam in his eyes. I laughed, knowing he was referring to the porn I had shown him the other day. And then my usual reaction to things like this set in – I wondered if he was serious. Was he really going to use this funnel to piss in my ass? He says the look on my face was priceless. And I enjoyed the thrill of him teasing me and making me a little scared. For me fear is hot when it’s in his hands, I think because I trust him so much. We had a good laugh even as I pulled my hands to my face and looked scared. He said that he wishes he had thought to have a can of chicken Vienna sausages in his other hand to show me right after the funnel. Hee hee.

So funnelicious sounds like funalicious. And as the funnel theme didn’t end there it seems a suitable title for this entry.

We got set up in the bedroom and he told me to put on the enema porn on that I had liked. He stroked his cock as he decided what exactly to do to me. He had me play with myself a bit – I used the Nea on my clit. He asked if I had ever given myself an enema, and I replied that I had not. I think I had an enema for health reasons as a kid once, but that’s my only experience. He said he thought he had an enema in the house and was pondering having me use it. He asked how I felt about that, and I had to say I had mixed feelings – nervousness and arousal. The nerves come mainly from my own idea that a enema will definitely cause stomach cramps – maybe I’m wrong? The woman in the porn didn’t seem to be suffering. The arousal because it’s naughty and the feeling of being filled up anally is arousing.

He told me to get a toy to put in my ass, and I selected my Tantus ripple, it’s a fairly small butt plug I purchased a few years back as a relative newbie to anal play. I think he was a little surprised that I chose something so small, but as I don’t get in a lot of anal play small is usually just fine. I can take his big cock in my ass, but that’s the exception to the rule. He had me work the plug in as we watched the porn. I lubed my ass up well, lubed the plug up, and worked it in. I got it in pretty quickly and he commented on this. He had me play with it, stroking it in and out. I think the filled up feeling was more arousing than the thrusting. He wanted to know if I wanted to be fucked in the ass. Oh yes.

I added more lube and then kneeled at the edge of the bed. He worked his hard cock in. It felt good to be so filled up. He fucked me, saying, “Nice asshole.” I used the Nea on my clit, but really the main focus was on my ass. I grew ever more excited and soon begged for permission to come. “You want to come already?” He fucked me more and I kept moaning and squealing with delight and desperation to come. He let me come and even my rectum bears down during orgasm – not as bad as my vaginal muscles though.  I’d come hard, then after a while get a little sore in the ass. I’d think that maybe I needed to ask him to stop but then he’d pound me harder and I’d immediately come again. Over and over, I would think that the pain was reason to stop and then I’d come again. Hard. I really am a masochist. It amazes even me.

We determined that the small funnel he had on hand wouldn’t be practical for the piss-in-ass play. We’d definitely need something with a tube like in the porn. I don’t doubt that one day I’ll visit his place and he’ll have one handy.

Introduction of The Cane

Published on August 30, 2009 in D/s, DeeDee, Uncategorized, Vienna sausages, analingus, bdsm, caning, horny, kink, masochism, orgasm on command, phone sex, porn, sadism, sex, sex toys, slut, spanking and submissive. 2 Comments

I think I’ve mentioned this before, but MasterDoc will be traveling for much of September. (He’s taking advantage of JetBlue’s offer for unlimited flights for a month for $599.) I will see him roughly once a week – on the nights when he’s back in town to go to work. This weekend I’ve been trying to savor every second and get in as much kinky sex as possible.

I had to be patient through a football game on Saturday night, but the patience paid off. When MasterDoc had gotten himself settled in the bedroom he called me in. He had DeeDee on the phone and she was going to listen in. She suggested that he use the new canes on me – she had gotten the impression from this blog that I wanted that. And yes, it’s one of those things I had mixed feelings about – I wanted to feel the cane (the lightest one anyway!) but I was a bit afraid of it.

So he talked to DeeDee via speaker phone as he got me on the bed and warmed up my ass spanking me with his hands. I was eagerly anticipating the cane and once warmed up he gave me what I hoped for. He used it fairly gently, he  later said that he used it at about 2/3rds of its potential. It left lovely red stripes on my ass which unfortunately I didn’t get to see. Some strikes were pleasurable, some made me squeal and pull back. But overall, I really enjoyed being caned. I’m sure it will be quite some time before I’m able to take the third cane we got – the thickest and sturdiest. We talked about this after, and I had to say that I’m sure that cane will hurt plenty, and like the sick freak that I am I will love it!

He fucked me from behind and made me beg for it. I was so horny and yearning to be fucked that I lost my usual shyness to say dirty things and I had no problem declaring that I wanted his cock inside me. He made me say that I’m a dirty slut. He made me beg for a while before he’d put his cock in. Instantly, I was hot and stimulated. I wish I could adequately find the words to describe a penis sliding into my aroused and engorged pussy. The thrill that comes from the feeling of it sliding in and touching the sides of my tingling cunt, filling me up.

He fucked me hard and smacked my ass a few times during. He did a lot of dirty talk – probably to make sure DeeDee had something good to listen to over the phone besides my moaning. I love when he talks dirty though. When I begged to come he made me beg for a moment and then let me come. At the sound of his voice telling me, “Come,” I am hurled forward into orgasm. I don’t know if I’m getting better at not squeezing his cock our or if he’s getting better at keeping it deep inside as I orgasm – but lately he stays inside me much longer than he used to. When his cock was pushed out he slapped my cunt while I kept coming. Lately he makes me come for so long I’m not sure I can keep coming at that point. Usually I’m having a hard time breathing, but meanwhile I feel absolutely amazing as I come hard.

I rested after coming and MasterDoc talked to DeeDee, trying to help her come. He made her watch some snowballing porn (i.e., women taking a guy’s come and passing it between their mouths). He had watched some earlier and that was what got me in the mood. It’s one of those things that I find disgusting on one level, but so frickin hot on another level. DeeDee did NOT sound happy about watching it and the idea that he plans to have her and I do it. He told her that she could come, but she’d have to do it while watching a snowballing porn. Ooh meanie! He’s done that sort of thing with me before (piss play). He’s skilled at desensitizing you to things you’re put off by. I start out repulsed by something, but after months of threatening to do it to me, I start to see it as erotic – BECAUSE it’s dirty, disgusting and therefore it’s fucking hot for him to make me do it. It’s very much a power exchange type of play.

On Sunday, I was still horny and I hoped that we might play a little before he headed out for the afternoon. He’s talked about canceling his cable and internet while he’s away this month, and I asked what we’d do for porn without any internet. He pointed out that he has dvds – and then impishly said he had the Japanese one with the Vienna sausages. Now, I’ve been teased with this story of the Vienna sausages since I started dating him. All I knew to this point was that the porn was really nasty and disgusting. He has a can of Vienna sausages on hand to tease submissives with. I finally asked him to tell me just what it was they do with the Vienna sausages in the porn. He asked if I really wanted to know, and he would be on the verge of telling me and then go, “Nah.” I ultimately begged him to tell me as my own thoughts of what it could be were getting pretty disgusting, and I really just wanted to know what the hell it was about. And he told me: in the film they put Vienna sausages up the submissive’s ass. Then they have her poop them out – and they reach in, pull out the sausages and have her eat them. Ewww!!! (No mixed feelings on that scene – I don’t want to do it!) I said that I thought maybe they put the sausages up a guy’s ass and made her eat them out of his ass. MasterDoc thought that was a great idea and I knew I’d made a big mistake telling him that. He started teasing me mercilessly. I tried to save myself by pointing out that I don’t eat beef, so therefore I won’t eat the sausages. He said, “Chicken Vienna sausages!” I said fine, if he could find some – thinking that’s something that’s just not made.

Oh shit. I was wrong. He found them online quickly. Shit. “Damn you amazon.com!” I cried. “Damn you!”

Luckily, the shipping for a case of them was nearly as much as the cost of the case of Vienna sausages. Phew. I decided not to hate amazon so much after that. But he searched further and there are other, cheaper, options for getting a hold of chicken Vienna sausages. Urgh. I now live in mortal fear of him getting his hands on some.

Ever since he played the snowballing porn the night before, I wanted him to come in my mouth. I mentioned this many times Sunday morning and eventually it sounded like I might get my wish. I wasn’t totally sure it would go the way I wanted it to when he took an extra bath to wash his ass extra well. I thought for sure he’d make me lick his asshole while he jerked off. I was in a very subby mindset that day, so I might have been less turned off about analingus than usual. He went off into the bedroom and told me that he’d call on me in about 15 minutes or so.

When he did call me in, he told me to put on my collar. I entered the bedroom, excited, and put my collar on. He looked me in the eye and told me to get in the right mindset. I stood with my hands behind my back and said, “Yes, Sir.”

“So you said you wanted my come in your mouth,” he said archly.

“Yes, Sir.”

He had been laying on his side, leaning a bit forward. At that point he rolled his body back a bit and revealed small puddles of his come on the Fascinator Throe. He instructed me to come over and lick his come up. I got on hands and knees on the bed and bent down, dragging my tongue through the drops of come. He told me he wanted to see at least one string of come coming out of my mouth but the drops would disperse in my saliva really quickly. I licked slowly and carefully. Upon request, I stuck my tongue out for him to see. He told me to go, “Mmm good!” and I did, with more enthusiasm than I once did. And he told me to swallow.

It hadn’t been quite what I fantasized, but being in a subby mindset I was happy for whatever he gave me. I was happy to be his cum slut, licking his come off the blanket. He had me remove my collar and we got up.

In the living room, he came over to kiss me, and I playfully stuck my tongue out at him – encouraging him to give me a deep kiss. He called me a wise guy and made me put my collar on again and get on hands and knees on the bed. He gave me some sharp whaps with the lightest cane. I’d whimper sometimes. It was short, and when he was done he had me take my collar off and told me, “Now, that wasn’t a punishment. It was a treat.” I said, “Thank you, Sir.” and was a very happy girl indeed.

I will miss him this month.

My mind is reeling with dirty, dirty things. I think I will spend a lot of time writing kinky erotica while he’s gone.