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Chemistry

Published on June 19, 2011 in attraction, blow jobs, cunnilingus, dating, horny, masturbation, non-monogamy, sex, slut, spanking, the writer and Uncategorized. 2 Comments

I had a very busy week, and some nights I was too busy doing non-kinky things to write about the hot nights I had with MasterDoc. I’ve found that my infrequent writing here is not only down to feeling burnt out, but also due to such limited time. Finding time to be alone and work on a post has been getting hard to do. And besides, if I didn’t go live life this wouldn’t be a very good blog, now would it?

Because I didn’t at least take time to make notes, I find I can’t remember details of the sex I had days ago with MasterDoc. This sucks. Not only because I like to chronicle my time with him here, but also he tends to feel a bit hurt if I manage to write about someone else but not my sex with him. After nearly four years together, however, even the most exciting kinky sex life can get a little routine. Even though routine for us is still way better sex than most people have. He turns me on immensely and I have mind-blowing orgasms as he wrings them out of me for as long as he can possibly make me come – but writing about it, finding the words to describe it, has become a bit routine. The sex is still exciting.

But, gentle reader (that’s oh so Miss Manners of me), I’m sure that while you still want the pervy details of my sex life with MasterDoc (and I will continue to write about it) it can also be exciting to hear I’ve had an excellent time naked with someone new.

I had an excellent time naked with someone new.

The back story: this guy wrote to me on the usual dating site and we got into talking about music we like in common. I liked that he was interesting and not trying to just plan having sex with me. We had a date a week ago – a normal date. We met at a bar, had a few drinks and talked for a few hours. Then we made out in the corner of the bar for a bit. I knew then that I wanted to fuck him.

I like him – not just sexually but also we have a lot in common and he’s smart and interesting to talk to, laugh with, etc. He’s a journalist, out of work like so many people are nowadays. I remember when the idea of dating a guy without a job would give me pause, now at least two out of the three guys I had dates with over the past couple of months have been unemployed. With such rampant unemployment, not having a job is no longer necessarily an indicator that someone is a slacker.

So we exchanged emails during the week and I found myself getting really horny thinking about having sex with him. I think waiting until the second date actually made things better. No, really. He and I happen to have great sexual chemistry and the anticipation drove me wild.

MasterDoc and DeeDee were away for the weekend, and as usual I tried to keep myself busy as too much time alone tends to make me depressed. I invited this guy over (I need a pseudonym for him. Maybe he’ll give me one.), told him he was welcome to crash since we’re at nearly opposite ends of New York City. Now from this it should be clear that I had every intention of fucking him. But the night moved slowly and I’m not used to that. I kept thinking that I just wanted him to FUCK ME. I enjoyed hanging out, talking, watching some stuff on netflix, and making out off and on. It was lots of fun. But waiting just made me feel more desperate to get laid. This is interesting. I don’t get that way with everyone.

Eventually we ended up in the bedroom, clothes were taken off and strewn upon the floor. We made out, rubbed up against each other and groped heavily. I was so horny and so turned on that my first orgasm with this guy was from him grabbing me me roughly. I’m sure that MasterDoc’s training me to be super sensitive sexually helped that happen, but I was surprised that it even could happen with a guy other than MasterDoc.

I wanted his cock inside me so badly. The slowness of the date drove me crazy. I eventually broke down and told him straight up that I wanted to fuck. He’s not kinky, he’s not a Dom, but he does like his sex rough. And rough sex is just awesome. It’s a very different dynamic than the one I have with MasterDoc. (It felt strange to be called beautiful rather than a piece of fuckmeat. lol) But we did have unusually good sexual chemistry. And despite not being particularly kinky, he reached one hand around me and spanked me a bit (pretty mildly at first but he kept going) and I came from the spanking.

He went down on me – and I always take it to be a good sign when a guy goes down on me first – those guys are pretty much always good lovers. When I blow a guy first then it’s hit or miss if he’s any good. I’m not sure how many times I came before he fucked me. When he finally fucked me (I had been waiting for it all night!) he made me come hard. I wanted it to go on a while but unlike MasterDoc it’s not extremely difficult to get this man to come. (Oh he wasn’t a minuteman certainly. But this guy can come while fucking with a condom on. MasterDoc generally can’t.) This is awesome in its own way, but different from what I’ve gotten used to. I kept making sure that the throe was under me so I wouldn’t potentially soak the bed. We cuddled a bit, thankfully he’s a cuddler too. We soon ended up grabbing at each other, I sucked his cock and demonstrated my fantastic sexual skills (partly due to talent, partly due to a terrific Dom who trained me well). I asked him to fuck me; he told me to beg. Oh hell yes I begged. Again, a wonderful fuck. He has a nice cock.

We took a break and watched more netflix in the living room. He’s about 4 years older than me so we’re of the same generation – we have a lot of the same pop culture references. We sounded like old people when we talked about how back in the day we grew up without internet.

He asked if I wanted to put something else on tv. I suggested we could just go back to bed. It did not take any arm twisting to get him there. Fooling around with him was intense. I wanted to fuck again, but having come twice in one night it’s not surprising that his cock wouldn’t totally cooperate. (It got hard, it just didn’t stay hard when we went to fuck.) I’m not one to have a thing about this, after all my body doesn’t always cooperate sexually either. We got each other off in other ways and were quite tired by the end.

He slept next to me, and it felt comfortable. I had a hard time getting back to sleep completely when in the early hours of the morning he got more cuddly. I love cuddles when I’m awake, but I generally prefer to sleep in my own space. His hands felt nice so I didn’t say anything. A few hours later we got up for good.

I started the coffee and we fooled around more while it brewed. We hung out and I started mapping out my plans to meet up with Blondie that afternoon. After talking and him showing me stuff on youtube that is amazingly bad, he asked if we could go play around again. He didn’t have to twist my arm. We both managed to come again by the end.

Since I was headed closer to his neighborhood on my way to meet Blondie, he rode with me in the car and I dropped him at a subway station. Once I figure out my schedule for this week it’s time to plan another rendezvous with him. I hope we can keep up having a great time hanging out, followed by fucking. I’m a simple girl, those are the things I want to do most.

Edited to add: I’ve decided to dub this guy “the writer.”

DP

Published on May 17, 2011 in anal, analingus, bdsm, blow jobs, consensual non-consent, cunt, D/s, DeeDee, dom, dp, horny, kink, libido, masturbation, nipple clamps, non-monogamy, orgasm on command, poly, prostate massage, sex, sex toys, shio, slut, spanking, squirting, submissive, swinging, threesome and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

I’m a naughty girl and terribly behind in my blogging again. I took notes for two of the three encounters I’ve enjoyed since midweek, but fleshing them out has taken a backseat.

Last Wednesday I had a night alone with MasterDoc and he put the easier nipple clamps on (i.e., not clover clamps). I got into the pain. It wasn’t as unbearable as the clover clamps. He pinched and twisted them, too and placed the clamps’ chain between my teeth. The problem with that was I had to hold my head up off the pillow to reach the chain and a sore neck was not the intention.

I should mention that MasterDoc is a considerate Dom. If I speak up about something I’d like more of than we’ve been doing, he will take my wishes under consideration – and often the item at hand will come up in our sex soon after. The nipple play was a recent request – I’m not sure why that became something he didn’t really do for a while. Such things happen. I’ve also mentioned that I love his talking dirty to me. He did that on Wednesday and said he liked having my body to play with. I just swooned into his arms. He very nearly could have made me come there.

My neck was bothering me, and my body sore and tired from exercise and a long day, so we shifted to me using the Siri vibe on myself since needed to lay flat for a while. MasterDoc touched me to add that fabulous element to my masturbation, but in some respects he was too gentle. I missed the raw dirty talk he had been giving me just a short time before. That night, I had a hard time with getting and staying aroused. I blame the fatigue. I did come. Just not the way I usually do.

He fucked from on top with the blindfold on and while I suppose I often find that hot, I found that not being able to see him reduced my arousal. Phooey. As I’ve said, these things happen.

He fucked me doggy style next. Again I had problems getting and staying aroused. But he managed to push me to orgasm before we were through. Sometimes the push was verbal – yay more dirty talk! Finally, I helped him come via massaging his thighs and ass, then licked his asshole like he likes and finally finished things off with a prostate massage.

It’s kinda funny now to think that analingus was a hard limit when I filled in a bdsm checklist when I first met MasterDoc.

Saturday night we had fabulous sex that lifted me from the mild depression I was in. I didn’t take notes. My sieve-like brain can’t remember details. Yeah I suck. But the sex was awesome and you will just have to trust me. Unfortunately, when we went back to hanging out after the sex my mildly depressed and rather withdrawn mood returned. Ordinarily there would have been another round, but I felt so tired from the depression that I wasn’t up to it.

On Sunday, we had over another Dom who contacted MasterDoc on fetlife after reading my profile where I say that if a Dom wants to play with me, they should contact my Dom as it’s his decision. This was perfect timing since we’ve come to realize that I need someone to play with so I get enough sex – and that totally vanilla sex probably wouldn’t work for me for an ongoing fuck buddy situation. I have a high sex drive, and while MasterDoc certainly does too, he likes variety and dates or fucks various women so his high libido is shared with many.

Well this other Dom is a very attractive guy, in his 40s, and really into rough sex and being down and dirty. I don’t usually go for athletic builds (it’s not on my list of must have criteria in a man, though it’s certainly not a deal breaker or anything) but I have to say I do appreciate the lean, muscled body this Dom has developed. He has experience wrestling and uses it to good effect in a bdsm setting. But perhaps I’m jumping ahead…..

MasterDoc had me sitting on floor at his feet when “another Dom” came in. (I need a pseudonym for him.) DeeDee answered the door in her sexy maid’s outfit – I find the maid outfit embarrassing on me, but DeeDee loves the theatricality of it.

We talked for a bit – mostly he and MasterDoc – and then MasterDoc indicated we should adjourn to the bedroom. I don’t get MFM threesomes often, and damn I enjoy them. MasterDoc had me start off by sucking his cock. During this he invited the guy over to grab my ass. (I was in a bra and sexy black slip.) The other guy slapped my ass – hard! He seems to have a heavier hand than most. Not sure I can handle such hard hits, which I spoke up about of course, as did MasterDoc and the guy laid off the hard spanks.

This guy goes for the gusto when having sex and after just a brief bit of dirty talk in my ear, he went for my pussy and decided to see if I truly do squirt. His fingers made me come in no time. Of course I held off until MasterDoc told me to come. I squirted a whole lot. The throe was soaked.

Next I sucked the new guy’s cock. There was lots of gagging, with saliva flowing. He spit on my face – the first time I’d ever experienced it. I wasn’t sure if I’d like it but I did find it kinda hot. MasterDoc was uncomfortable that something as edgy as spitting would be brought in without negotiation (I concur). That got addressed a bit later.

MasterDoc fucked me while I sucked the guy’s cock. This was Hot! (With a capital “h”) Then they switched and the other guy fucked me while I sucked MasterDoc’s cock. (Again, hot with a capital “h.”) Next the guy fucked me up the ass (I seem to be making this “anal upon first meeting” thing a habit.) He made me come a whole lot while fucking my ass.

I can’t even begin to estimate how many times I came that evening.

We took a break, but as dinner had not yet arrived, after a conversation on limits we went back for more. MasterDoc suggested we try double penetration – I’ve never experienced it, just frustrating attempts. MasterDoc lay on the bed, I got on top of his cock, then the other guy went to work his cock into my ass. It was still hard to get proper angle – my butt’s a bit sore from where it was poked before he got it in. But the struggling was brief, and holy shit it worked! It felt… like I was being fucked in two holes at once. I know that sounds self-explanatory but it’s the only way I can think to describe it. While I felt quite filled it wasn’t uncomfortable like I had worried it would be. Both orifices expanded to make each penetration comfortable in and of itself. As they both fucked me I just kept on coming over and over. Good, primal, grunting and screaming orgasms.

After a break for dinner, the guy was up for one more fuck. We went into the bedroom and I sucked his cock, gagging on it. He had me lay on the bed and he fucked me from on top. He pinned me down – there’s that wrestler skill! – and fucked me like there’s no tomorrow. Dude is in shape. I couldn’t believe how long he fucked me at a hard, relentless pace. Most guys can’t do that. Of course, I loved it. He put his hand on face from time to time, holding my head to the side while he continued to fuck me. This was hot and would inevitably make me come harder. I began to wonder which of us would ask to stop first. He did, but I was pretty fucked-out by that time myself.

Since this went well, I’m free to schedule casual fucks with this guy when I have free time. Neither of us has a lot of free time, and who knows how often it will coincide, but it’s nice to think there’s another cock out there I can call on when I need something extra – a cock that comes with rough sex.

Afternoon Sex x 4

Published on May 5, 2011 in anal, bdsm, caning, D/s, dom, dp, forced orgasm, horny, kink, masochism, masturbation, orgasm on command, porn, sadism, sex, sex toys, shio, spanking, squirting, submissive and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

On my day off, I got one of those afternoons I remember having when I was 18 and dating my first boyfriend. MasterDoc and I spent the better part of the afternoon in bed. Knowing that we were going to have sex, I set up the bedroom – throe on the bed, condoms, lube and my collar out and any toys I thought we might like to use. As he bathed, I took my siri and worked my clit.

He seemed to be taking a long time in the bath, so I walked in, vibe still in hand and found him reading a book. (He often has his nose in a book. No wonder I love him.) I told him matter of factly that I was “hot, wet and ready for him.” This made him finish his bath faster.

After some distraction (He often gets sidetracked helping a friend or lover with a problem. He’s a mensch like that.) he put on some porn from PublicDisgrace.com. I loved the video of a woman being passed around at party. I’ve had fantasies like that, of being the entertainment at a party of pervs who play with my body in all sorts of ways. While we watched, I played with my vibe. He stroked himself and we soon fucked with me on hands and knees. But first, he used the anal beads on me. It took a while to work them all in. The small ones go in easily but the last couple can take some work. He took breaks to fuck me briefly, I suppose to get my body used to having both holes filled before the largest diameter beads were in. Sometimes firm toys can prove to be painful when doing double insertion, but this worked out. The last two beads felt quite large. He murmured, “That’s it just two more to go,” and I relaxed my sphincter as best I could. I could feel my ass stretch to accommodate them.

He fucked me with the beads in. He’d tug on and wiggle the beads as he fucked me. I squirted a TON. The throe was sopping wet from that time forward. As we cuddled, I folded it over so I wasn’t laying in this huge wet spot. And yes, all that squirting went hand in hand with a massive series of orgasms. He caned me a bit after. The pain melted into pleasure and I probably could have come from the caning. (I have before.)

My body was sore and tired from exercise and all the fucking the night before at the club. But you know me, I’m nearly always ready for sex. I told MasterDoc how during that long fuck I kept thinking about him fucking me up the ass. He said that he had considered that. I told him that I thought maybe I should say, “Would you like to fuck my ass, Sir?” as a way to indicate I would like to, but still leaving him in control of course. I really should have said it, but better late than never. He tried fucking my ass, but for some reason we just couldn’t get the right angle. I tried flipping over the axis, but then I found myself face down in my own squirt. And while I generally think my squirt has a pleasing, light, musky smell, being nose to liquid was too much. I flipped the shape over again. When anal wouldn’t work, he fucked my pussy again for a while and then we tried anal with us laying on our sides. (I mention these sorts of things because this shit happens to us all. Sometimes sex doesn’t work the way you want it to. You just move on and try something else.) He got his cock in but it wasn’t the ideal position. Of course even in non-ideal positions I often come like a porn star in heat. This was no exception.

Soon after, he wanted to fuck me again and I couldn’t believe my incredible luck. He kept making me come so much! Four times in an afternoon! (And my orgasms are long, extended, multiple affairs usually.) MasterDoc got on top for a fuck after I placed a towel on top of all my squirt on the throe.

This sex was transcendent. I actually managed to open my eyes a few times to look into his. I’m sure the look in my eyes was one of helpless lust. He made me come for a long time. I have no idea how long it actually was, but it was much longer than most fucks last. My body turned into jelly and I actually stopped holding up my legs at one point – somehow my joints were suddenly more flexible than usual. I couldn’t feel anything but him fucking me.

While I recovered, for sex like that requires recovery, I was near tears of happiness from having so many overwhelming orgasms. I admitted that if MasterDoc said, “I’m worth it, aren’t I?” (when I’m faced with some pesky chore around his place) over the next few days, I couldn’t give any answer but an unqualified YES. (Depending on the task and the day, I sometimes grumble a bit, although I usually admit he’s worth it.)

I think he should start giving classes. More women need to enjoy the level of sex I do.

Awesome, Awesome Night

Published on May 4, 2011 in bdsm, bisexuality, blow jobs, bondage, couple, cunt, D/s, dom, embarrassment, exhibitionism, flogging, forced orgasm, foursome, horny, humiliation play, kink, lesbian, masochism, masturbation, non-monogamy, orgasm on command, restraints, sex, sex parties, sex toys, shio, slut, spanking, squirting, submissive, swinging and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

On Monday night we went to the swing club since I had off the next day. On the way there, MasterDoc pulled the car over by a porn store, the type with the porn booths that MasterDoc likes taking ladies to. I was feeling easily embarrassed somehow and hoped that perhaps this wasn’t happening. But he dragged me in, I felt super shy as we nodded hello to the guy working behind the counter. We got to the booths and I figured I was in the clear when there were no people there, but he walked me back out into the store where the employees were. He stood me in front of him, ostensibly looking at a display of porn box covers and started caressing my shoulders and grabbing hold of my hair. Fuck. He knows me. He knows the slight humiliation of getting turned on in public, and how he can do that to me effortlessly, would turn me on. My body twitched a bit, giving away my increasingly aroused state.

Thankfully, we were only there a short while. In the car as we continued to the club he said, “I should have a least let the guy who works there have a grope.” I’m sure I blushed at this. At the club, we met one of our usual pals there and had a nice chit chat. Veronica is the bartender but she also amuses the single guys. After the chat, MasterDoc went to use the restroom, and I felt shy while waiting alone. If guy comes over to me, I’m never sure if flirting is okay as MasterDoc decides who I play with. I probably seem like an aloof bitch sometimes. I assure you, it’s shyness rather than bitchiness. It also stems from knowing that giving some guys the least bit of polite attention will have them pursuing you all night long.

I watched the porn on the big screen. “Hey, is that Paris Hilton?” I thought. I usually disdain Ms. Hilton, but I gained a smidgen of respect (!) as I watched her blow her boyfriend. The girl’s got skillz.

I ask for a cuddle when MasterDoc gets back and he agreed we could use a cuddle. We hadn’t seen each other in a couple of days and therefore hadn’t cuddled. The cuddle turned into a little making out and him caressing my body. It amazes me still how, with him, simply having my breasts stroked (the top part mind you, not the nipples) I can get turned on tremendously. You know, being his trained monkey who gets turned on and comes at his command isn’t such a bad thing.

The room with the king bed was busy, so we headed to the chilly back room. I was very horny already and soon didn’t notice the cool air. We cuddled, caressed each other and kissed. I love feeling his body under my hand. He had me go down on him and I enjoyed every second. He managed to truly fuck my throat at one point. It was pretty awesome. He thrust in, I could feel the ridge of his cock head press pass some spot in my throat and I have trained my gag reflex pretty well by now – I didn’t start gagging until a few deep thrusts had been achieved. A guy came in to watch sometime during this. MasterDoc had me get on hands and knees so my ass was facing the room. He showed me off, using a flashlight to highlight my pussy. I felt thrilled and embarrassed (and thrilled to be embarrassed) by the attention. He used clothespins on my labia, but I was so engrossed in being a slut on display that I didn’t pay much attention to them. He inserted the anal beads. I’ve found though that I can’t often tell exactly which toy is up my ass. I don’t seem to have the right amount of sensation for details there, but I knew I was being filled with something, He flogged me a bit, telling the guy how much I love being shown off. He had the guy hold my butt cheek out of the way one time and I could never be sure exactly whose hands were touching my cunt (I think it was always him other than the butt cheek thing). He made me come for an extended period of time and I was exhausted. Or so I thought.

We dressed and MasterDoc noticed a couple with a hot woman. He started chatting up the couple, and I joined him in being friendly. I didn’t have a problem with the guy as sometimes happens, and I was doing my best to help MasterDoc get in the hot woman’s skirt. We ended up showing them our bag of tricks. They were from out of town and friendly in that southern way. I really think I’d have better conversational skills had I been raised in the south. The woman was shy and quiet, but her man was very talkative. They seemed quite nice. MasterDoc made me come via magic wand and fingering when it came out that the guy in the couple had never seen a woman squirt. Of course I did. He thought it was awesome.

We rested on the bed, chatting with the couple as she stood against the wall and her guy sat on an ottoman. MasterDoc was doing his best to be charming and get the lady’s attention. The guy was fascinated by our toy bag and I ended up in the behind-the-back restraints. After he got them on, he told me to kneel in them, and I’m sure my struggle to get myself upright was fun to watch. He had me lean forward so that I was resting on my head and shoulders. I told him that was very uncomfortable (as ending up with a neckache is not a desirable outcome) and he told me I just had to do it for a little while. I think I was the definition of helpless with my ass in the air and hands behind my back. He let me sit, and I stayed there for a while sitting next to him with my arms behind my back. MasterDoc spread my legs and played with my cunt. He made me come again through slapping my cunt – I think he really enjoyed showing off that he could do that. The sheets were pretty damn wet by now.

I’m slowly starting to realize that a woman like me can be intimidating for a man. I don’t think of myself as intimidating, but being so in control of my sexuality (and choosing to hand that control over to MasterDoc) and so comfortable with having sex in front of people does intimidate guys. I tell you, if a slutty woman is interested in playing with you, don’t be intimidated – go for it! We love sex. Even if it’s not the most amazing sex we ever had, odds are if we’re mutually interested in fucking you we will enjoy it too. I don’t think loving sex is at all a bad thing. Religion doesn’t know what it’s talking about.

I stripped the wet sheets from the bed and we went to the main room. It seemed like the woman in the couple wasn’t too interested, but soon the guy from the couple came over and asked if I wanted to make his wife come. I’m certainly game to make an attractive woman come, and I’m sure our men would enjoy watching. Also, perhaps if this woman was warmed up MasterDoc might get somewhere with her. MasterDoc gave his assent (I’m his slut, he decides) and we adjourned to the king room again. We had to find someone to put new sheets on. There was initial awkwardness as her shyness continued and MasterDoc talked about how I’m not the aggressive type – the problem was she’s not either. She got undressed to try to move things along and I felt freer to start playing with her. Her body was perfectly toned, her augmented breasts standing up perkily. Her husband suggested I use a toy and I used my siri on her clit then worked my fingers inside. I made her come pretty damn quickly and it was fun to watch, she just about did a crab walk backwards on the bed because of the intensity of the stimulation. I totally understand why MasterDoc sometimes chuckles when I’m coming like crazy.

I took my bra off and even though this woman was pretty much our society’s ideal (except she wasn’t young) she sounded envious when she commented on how big my breasts are and how they’re real. It’s terrible how nearly all women seem to have body issues these days. She made me come next, using just her hands and MasterDoc lent a hand. I squirted again.

I felt pretty damn tired, but MasterDoc wanted to fuck and I did want his cock. I sucked him til he was hard. He played with my pussy which of course was sopping wet. He fucked me from behind while at least one guy watched and he pushed me over the edge (orgasm-wise) with relative ease. (Remember, I don’t just get to come, I need to hold back as long as I can but if he drives me crazy he won’t get mad if I come before he’s said the word.) I was totally lost in lala land during orgasm after orgasm. I can only imagine what my face looked like. I think sometime I need someone to film me coming so I can see it.

It was an awesome fuck. He kept going and going, and guess what? I squirted again. A whole lot. It was just as well I hadn’t taken the last sheet off but instead suggested to MasterDoc that we use the same room because I had already besmirched the sheet.

I was so tired (having worked all day, exercised in the evening and then came, and came and came) that I just lay there after. He had me spread my legs to show guy my pussy to the guy there while I rested. He gave guy the flashlight to get a better look.

MasterDoc nearly had to cart me home. I slept like a proverbial log that night.

As an aside, in the midst of our trying to flirt with the couple, a guy from Spain (he told us he was from Spain) appeared with two hot Mexican chicks. The guy was aggressive in trying to set something up with the couple. The women looked eager to play. I later caught sight of them making out with each other – I wanted to be in the middle of that! Sadly, this was not to be.

MasterDoc, the Cure for What Ails Me

Published on April 25, 2011 in anxiety, bdsm, bondage, caning, crazy, D/s, derangement, dom, emotions, forced orgasm, gags, kink, libido, masochism, neurosis, restraints, sex, sex parties, shio, spanking, squirting, trust and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

The rest of the weekend was uneven in quality. On Friday, I hung out with Blondie in SoHo and the east Village. I had a great time but carrying a too large, too heavy purse screwed up my back. MasterDoc was planning on schtuping me that night, which hadn’t happened since the previous Monday due to various plans and time constraints. With my back bothering me so much, I wasn’t up for it. I was frustrated to no end, but I couldn’t manage the pain of the back and staying in a sex position for too long. I tried to write it off considering the next evening I was going to be his date to a kink party. DeeDee was going with her other boyfriend.

MasterDoc did massage my back (isn’t he a nice Dom?) and cuddle a little, but PMDD was setting in and I felt abandoned when, my eyes closed while resting, he left me alone in the bedroom. The madness that can come with a particularly bad bout of PMDD was strong, and I started thinking… no, I started being convinced that MasterDoc was bored with me and/or no longer attracted to me. This resulted in a heavy depression on Saturday. I took a trip downtown to get my hair cut and found myself not having any impetus afterward to do anything but wander around in the rain until I could catch the next express bus. I tried to perk up in time for the party. MasterDoc was concerned about taking me out because of the depression, and unfortunately that proved founded.

All night, somehow our wires crossed and things ended up badly. I just kept longing for him to hug me, to cuddle me, to touch me and tell me everything was all right. I wanted him to play with me since it had been a little while and reestablishing that connection would feel so good to my depressed, insecure brain. On his end, he says that I put up walls and made it impossible to connect with me. I felt like he wasn’t really trying. Oy. We did connect for just long enough for him to make me come, and squirt a little, but when he became engrossed with watching another D/s couple play, I felt ignored and threatened because the other woman had a much hotter body than me. Meanwhile MasterDoc was enjoying watching the connection of the other couple because they seemed to have the sort of unspoken connection he and I so often have.

Please allow me to say, I don’t like myself when I’m depressed. I don’t like being depressed. With many people, I can hold off on getting downright hysterical, but I think because I trust MasterDoc so much I often suddenly direct any sadness and rage at him. I hate when I do this. At the time, the idea of being no longer attractive or interesting felt entirely real to me. I’m sure anyone reading this can see that it was just the PMDD.

The following morning was tearful. But thankfully I was ultimately able to realize that he wasn’t shunning me the night before (even if that’s how I felt) and I was probably putting up walls (even if I didn’t think I was) and that we love each other very much. My intense feelings of anger and sadness came out of worrying that he didn’t want me anymore. As ridiculous as that sounds it was insanely intense.

The depression lasted the rest of the weekend, but I was able to reconnect with MasterDoc. Having him cuddle me soothed my crazy brain. He took me into the bedroom and employed playing techniques that I had been clamoring for. Like the couple we saw the prior evening, he cuffed my hands behind my back, and he used a strip of duct tape to gag me. I lay over the Liberator Axis and he gave me a good caning. My pain tolerance was lousy and I wished I could move out of the way – but with my hands behind me I couldn’t push myself up. I couldn’t even wiggle out of the way. I had to trust that he would judge the right amount of pain to induce an endorphin rush. While the caning hurt like the dickens, I think it had the right effect on my brain chemistry.

He told me to get up on hands and knees, and I mumbled through the gag that I couldn’t get on my hands with them behind my back. I was still gagged, and struggling to breathe slowly through the one clear nostril I had. (You see, if you breathe in too sharply your nasal passage narrows.) He slipped a condom on and fucked me with my arms secured behind my back. It was so worth waiting for. He fucked me long and hard. I know that phrase is totally overused but it’s the best description. He kept pounding me until I couldn’t hold back and I came. It was a magnificent orgasm, but I felt like I was suffocating and that abruptly stopped my body and compelled me to manage to move my arms around to the side just enough to rip off the duct tape. MasterDoc joked that he’s a doctor and wouldn’t let anything happen to me. If I passed out he’d be there. I know breath play can be hot but it often just makes me anxious. He understood that the anxiety was too much. He fucked me again, with my wrists released and the tape off, and that time I had every possible orgasm wrung from my body.

My depression was lifted for the entire time I was fucking and coming. Hey, how could I feel depressed mid-orgasm? (Although if it’s possible I’m sure I can do it.) After cuddles to further soothe my savage soul he had me get on top. We tried doing it with my cuffs linked but I couldn’t lean forward onto my hands and as a result my hips and thighs got such a workout that I was promptly exhausted. MasterDoc put me on the bottom, and he fucked me silly again. I’ve always loved sex with MasterDoc, but holy fuck now that he gets testosterone supplements and he’s lost some weight he can fuck harder and longer. It’s wonderfully bewildering to have a Dom in his mid-50′s fuck better than guys half his age.

I felt better having reconnected and gotten fucked. My hormones still raged and I found myself feeling teary, but thankfully I was no longer aiming my mad and sad feelings at MasterDoc. (He should be made the first Jewish saint for dealing with my anger when I’m depressed. It hurts him, even if he knows it’s just the chemical imbalance talking.) Feeling his skin pressed against me is soothing. While he can’t magically cure my PMDD, he has the capacity to make it better, even if only for a little while.

Heh. Saint MasterDoc, patron saint of wayward women. (By the way, I managed to leave out of the flow of the story that I blew him for a while, and then later in the evening I helped him come with prostate massage. So my Sir did get direct appreciation shown for him putting up with me.)

Just the Two of Us

Published on April 6, 2011 in anxiety, bdsm, blow jobs, caning, cunt, D/s, kink, masochism, needle play, orgasm denial, orgasm on command, sadism, sex, shio, spanking, squirting, submissive and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

Monday night, MasterDoc commented on how I seem to skip blogging about sex when it’s just him and I lately. Now, this is probably true only for last week, and on some level he was teasing me with the guilt. But I’m sure there was a smidgen of hurt there. It’s certainly not due to our sex as a couple being any less interesting (although I suppose multi-party sex is more uncommon and therefore more interesting in general).

When I hang out at MasterDoc’s for the evening, I try not to assume I’m getting sex. After all, DeeDee needs time alone with him and sex alone with him too. Nearly every evening I’m up for sex, but I try to be patient until I find out what he has in mind. I’m welcome to suggest sex, I just can’t assume that asking for it means I’ll get it. Monday night was one of those evenings when I was hoping but being patient. I was thrilled when he asked me if I wanted to fuck.

We were soon tucked away in the bedroom and he had me suck his cock, which he often does first. He says it’s a good time for him to plot out what he’s going to do that evening. As I sucked on his firm cock flesh, I thought to myself that the problem therein is that he goes from getting warmed up and naughty ideas to wanting to fuck right away, and I’m not always warmed up from just cock sucking. I love it, but it doesn’t always make me adequately wet. (Yes, lube comes in very handy. I kinda suspect some medication I’m on has decreased my wetness as I used to get wet much easier (and more consistently) than I do lately.) If I’m horny but not quite ready I will often just go with the flow and slap on some lube. He’s gotten really good about slowly penetrating me until my vagina opens up for sex. (Did you know that during arousal/foreplay the vagina lengthens and widens to get ready for sex? The kinky librarian is also educational!)

While he told me to get on hands and knees, and he slapped some latex on his cock, he took his time playing with me a bit. He swabbed the left side of my ass off with alcohol.

“I like these needles better than acupuncture needles. Maybe it’s because of my background,” he said as he grabbed a chunk of my flesh and slid a hypodermic needle through the skin. He generally does two needles and this time was no different. I wasn’t initially in a needle mood – I felt afraid of the pain and my ability to deal with it. My pain tolerance varies. I had a hard time eroticizing the pain like I usually do. He took a cane to the needles after they were stuck in my ass and it hurt! It reminded me of my very first needle play experience at a class during Floating World (east coast kink convention) a couple of years ago. The “mean lady,” as I dubbed her, who was teaching the class stuck my upper arm viciously even though I had said it was my very first experience. She then slapped on the needles and I shrieked in pain.

This wasn’t as bad. I have a level of trust with MasterDoc far beyond that of some woman I’d never met who was giving a class. I think I’ve explained here before that this masochist (for I can’t speak for all masochists) experiences a couple different types of pain – there’s the pain that’s distracting and keeps me from thinking about anything other than what hurts. The good pain is pain that feels more like a general sensation rather than what I recognize usually as pain – or – it hurts but I can breathe through it and the energy seems to turn into an endorphin rush soon enough. Unfortunately, the kind of pain that comes from a backache or illness doesn’t turn into endorphins. It just sucks.

But I digress. I continued to feel anxious that he was going to mess around with the needles in my ass and how that would feel. But he fucked me and I tried to put that out of my mind. And I would, until he poked at the needles again. He commented on how I was bleeding, which is usually quite minimal. I felt him wipe at the blood with his finger a little. He continued fucking me. As a doctor, he is not the least bit squeamish about blood. I soon forgot about the needles and focused on his cock. I’m not even sure when he pulled the needles out, it was just an undefinable pain and I assumed it was the needles being struck.

He fucked me until I was whimpering from the desire to come, and then pressed on further. I wondered if he was going to push me into coming. A moment later he gave me the order to come. No pushing necessary. I came and it was an absolutely stellar experience. While every orgasm is pretty damn amazing with MasterDoc, this just seemed like it was more affecting somehow. He kept me coming for a long time, as always. I don’t think anyone has pushed me to come for as long as he does. How marvelous to be with a man who makes you come longer, harder than anyone else has ever bothered to try!

Apparently I’m in a gushy mood tonight. Motion sickness bags can be found in the seat-back in front of you.

I squirted when he exchanged his penis for fingers in my cunt for a little while. The throe was soaked. He fucked me some more, and then fingered me for a bit, and then fucked me some more.

Finally, we collapsed.

I was a very happy puppy.

The Key to a Good Evening

Published on March 27, 2011 in bdsm, blow jobs, caning, consensual non-consent, cunt, D/s, DeeDee, exhibitionism, forced orgasm, humiliation play, kink, masochism, masturbation, orgasm on command, sadism, sex, sex parties, sex toys, shio, slut, spanking, squirting, submissive and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

DeeDee opted to stay home when we went out Friday night. MasterDoc had made her come so hard in the afternoon (while he was fucking her up the ass and she was using the magic wand) that she developed a terrible sex headache. He later bragged about this to one of the porn stars visiting the swing club.

While we were walking to his car, I realized that I didn’t have a spare key for his new-to-him car. He said that’s right, because right now there’s only one key. He has to get copies made.

Yes folks, this is foreshadowing.

We rode to the swing club in his car. I’m pleased to say it has a much better ride than his old one. It was terribly cold last night because apparently winter decided to turn around and come back to the northeast for a while. I scurried to the club since we parked down the block. Once inside, I stripped down to the mesh/lace/satin camisole I was wearing under my street clothes. I was cold still, so I kept my black cardigan on. Yes, I’m that woman who is dressed semi-sexy at the swing club because she’s cold.

We settled in, those details are pretty mundane. As we scoped out a room to play in, it was kinda odd to walk by a guy standing just inside the room we prefer with his shirt off, dick out and stroking his hard cock. He was reasonably attractive and quite fit but, uh, this struck me as creepy. I don’t know if it would strike anyone else the same way though. We laughed about how we needed to push past this wanking dude to get to the king size bed. MasterDoc ultimately decided we were just simply going to do that.

We got settled on the bed, and I was very much in sub mode. I felt even more shy than usual and avoided all eye contact with others. I scarcely knew how many guys were in the room at any time. MasterDoc had me suck his cock and he got into being quite rough and dominant – more so than he usually is at a swing club. He choked me on it a few times – holding my head down long enough that a bit of panic would set in. I’d pull away when I could, take a deep breath, and then he’d put me right back on his cock. I loved it.

The cock sucking, with occasional choking, went on for a while. My mouth was watering and nose a little sniffly by the time we were done. He had me kneel and face the doorway. I still had my sweater on, and while he did things to me I pretty much buried my face in my arms. It’s strange how I was so much more self-conscious than usual. I mean, I don’t like making eye contact to start with, but I really didn’t want to see or be seen (facially anyway) at all. A bit later I felt concerned that people might think we shouldn’t be naked (cuz we don’t have hot bodies) which is odd since I didn’t worry about this when I we were both about 50 lbs heavier! I ultimately told myself that it didn’t matter since I was having such amazing sex with a man I’m totally hot for. Who cares what other people think? I had a great time.

MasterDoc spanked the shit out of me. He caned me a bit, it sounded like there was at least a small appreciative audience. I was bewildered a little because he’s never quite that rough with me in public. He fingered me for a while, and while initially his fingernail scraped inside a bit uncomfortably, I was able to move past that. When he told me to come, I came. It was hard to keep coming when he’d hit my ass really hard again, but I came for a while.

He turned me around, and fucked me from behind. Tabitha, the porn star we’ve seen at the club before, came in and said hello. As I started getting distracted by the conversation between her and MasterDoc, MasterDoc would start pounding my cunt hard with his cock. Fuck. It was so hot the way he had me there moaning, incoherent, while he casually carried on a flirtatious conversation, trying to line up a fuck for later in the evening.

After Tabitha left, he really went at me and made me come til I squirted all over the bed. When we were finished and I got up, I found that the front hem of my chemise was soaked; totally soaked with my juices. I was happy but so tired. We cuddled a bit – I found that I was thrown off a little by such rough usage in a club. (He called me a bitch at lot. He told me to choke on his cock several times. It was hot but intense.) I felt like I needed to reconnect with the loving Dom after having spent time with the rough, mean one.

After a bit, we were both horny again from touching each other. He was stroking his cock and I was getting antsy for more fucking. We put me on my back and he went at it. He asked a guy to hold my leg and the guy did. An elderly guy reached out to touch the other but MasterDoc told him not to touch since he hadn’t told him he could touch. Trouble was, the bed (which is really an unfolded futon on a frame) started sagging towards my head and I started slipping that way. It was too uncomfortable for my back so I had to speak up. We regrouped, and he fucked me some more from on top.

This time another guy (at least, as far as I know it was a different guy – but I’m not sure) held my other leg but he pissed me off by yanking it too far outward. I told him not to do that as it hurt. Then he shifted to stroking my leg but the guy had the finesse of a spastic child. In the end, there was no way I was going to come with that dude touching me and totally distracting me.

We rested a bit, and he had me masturbate to another orgasm – which was pretty damn hot. But I realized that I was so, so tired. Since the time change I’ve been waking up too early and have been more tired than usual. All the fucking and coming had worn me out too.

We ended up sitting out in the social area, and we watched Tabitha flirt and let guys grope her. They were drawn like bees to flowers. On the sofa across from me sat this positively beautiful young man. Blond, fit, dressed well. I told MasterDoc that if I wasn’t so damn tired I’d want to fuck the guy. I kept looking at him. So perfect. He reminded me a little of Prince William when he was a very young man, before his hair started thinning and he started to look so much like his father. But I suppose this guy was better looking. MasterDoc teased me that he thought the guy might be underage. I figure since ID has to be shown to get in, that I’d be able to argue that even if he *was* underage that it was entirely reasonable that I would expect anyone I meet in there to be of age.

MasterDoc had me get on my knees and suck his cock for a while. It was a hard position to hold my back in, so I didn’t last long, but I think when I got up the cute young guy must have been looking since it appeared he was in the process of looking away.

The hot guy joined the throng around Tabitha for a bit. A nice looking couple sat in his place and MasterDoc and I both ogled the woman. She was hot, kinda nerdy, dressed more conservatively than you’d think someone would dress in a swing club. When her guy went to get them drinks, MasterDoc tried to strike up a conversation with her, but to no avail. I tried making eye contact too, but I think there wasn’t any interest.

I was incredibly tired. It was early still, around 11:30, but I just didn’t think I could do any more activity. MasterDoc agreed we could go home. (But of course he asked me a few times, “You’re sure you’re too tired, right?”) We got dressed, got our stuff out of the locker, and got our coats. But when MasterDoc checked his coat, he couldn’t find his keys. He had been concerned when he didn’t find them in the locker, but we figured they must be in his jacket. Nope.

I had my keys with me, but you have to remember that his was the ring with the only copy of the car key on it. Oy.

He tore the club apart looking. He offered to get me a cab to take me home while he waited for AAA. I decided I wasn’t tired enough to ask him to spend that money. I settled on the sofa in the social area, right near the bar, and lay down for a while. I figured no one would fuck with me there, plus I was fully dressed anyway. I rested the best I could although fatigue and the loud music was starting to give me a headache and even a bit of teeth-grinding. But somehow I stayed patient. I just reminded myself that the situation was what it was and getting upset wouldn’t change it.

MasterDoc came in and found me, and told me the good and bad news. Good news was he found the keys. The bad news was they were locked in his car in the ignition. Well at least he wouldn’t have to pay for locks on his car to be changed. We just had to wait for AAA to send someone to get into the car. MasterDoc wondered aloud if he could go fuck while he waited, and I told him he was certainly welcome to as far as I was concerned (not that he needs my permission!). I had a place to lay down and there was no reason he shouldn’t enjoy himself. He went off but soon came back as there was too long a line around Tabitha. He checked again later but I don’t think he got his extracurricular fuck that night.

AAA called MasterDoc’s cell phone and he went out to the car to meet them. I used the loo one last time and joined him after. They were just getting the car door open when I got there. It was freezing (I am so sick of the months of cold weather we’ve had around here!) but MasterDoc started up the car to warm me up while he settled with the guy who got the door open. Happily, over an hour after we tried to leave, we got on the road and went home.

Feel the Beat

Published on March 19, 2011 in anal, bdsm, blow jobs, caning, cunt, D/s, flogging, forced orgasm, happy, horny, kink, masochism, masturbation, orgasm on command, sadism, sex, sex toys, shio, spanking, squirting, submissive and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

MasterDoc wasn’t sure that he’d have time for me Friday, my day off. But I lucked out and all the horniness and desire for kink that was stoked by #fucktoyfriday on twitter got an outlet. (Fuck Toy Friday is a hashtag created by Saynine. Each Friday kinksters share naughty tweets and photos relating to being or using a sub as a fuck toy.) We didn’t have a long time together, but MasterDoc was in the mood to give an ass whuppin’ and, damn, did he! He used, among other implements, the heaviest cane and the evil strap. He was trying to leave marks but it’s gotten so hard to leave marks on my butt. The next day, there was nothing whatsoever in the way of marks.

But it hurt. He really made me hurt. And I did my best to breathe slowly and go with it. He would intersperse slapping or running a vibrator over my cunt with more hard slaps to my ass. He took the floggers to me and I can’t tell you how long the beating went on for. He’s not usually quite so sadistic (not a physical sadist anyway) but I knew that if I rode the pain out that a yummy endorphin rush would follow. He asked me if I’m a very lucky girl as he smacked my ass. I struggled but replied, “Yes, Sir!” between cane strikes even though I wasn’t feeling so sure I was lucky in the midst of this particular beating. I cried out and cursed more often than I usually do during a beating, but I managed to not pull away from the blows as much as I usually do.

When he took up the small flogger, I had to move my feet as far out of the way as I could. I hate when my feet get smacked as collateral damage during a flogging. I end up in this awkward position – on my knees, feet out as far to the sides as I can manage. After a good, long beating, he inserted my soraya vibrator but it wasn’t working at that angle – I think it pressed too hard into my pubic bone from that position. He removed it when I said it hurt (and not in a good, kinky beating sort of hurt). He put an acrylic dildo in my ass and the end hung out like a tail. It felt great. I haven’t had nearly enough ass play lately. He talked about maybe fucking me up the ass, but in the end he didn’t.

He praised me for starting to play with my cunt as he got a condom and put it on. I figured I could do my part to ensure I was warmed up adequately for fucking, although the beating seemed to do the trick quite well. He tried to fuck me with the toy in ass but it hurt so he removed it. He fucked me but good. He would intersperse caning and slapping my ass with fucking me hard.

The fucking put me into a lovely headspace as I moaned with each thrust. It wasn’t easy to take the extended beating, but I managed it just fine. I was soon moaning, wanting to come. When he gave permission, I had no trouble coming. He kept fucking me through lots and lots of orgasms. At that point I felt like the lucky girl I had declared I was earlier!

After the long beating, followed by the long fucking, I collapsed on the bed, exhausted. A short while later he wanted to fuck again. He asked if I could get on top for a ride, but unfortunately my knees were sore from having knelt so long. I was glad he opted to get on top of me. He drove me crazy, teasing me with just a little of his cock inside me, the head of his thick cock pressing against my g-spot. He made me come again, and squirt a bit, and then come again. He kept using his big cock to plow me. He’d move his hips around to make his cock move around inside. He demonstrated his ability to make me come as long as he wants to.

Damn, writing this is making me horny!

We had some cuddles after. (I had been in a more cuddly mood to start with, but I think the beating was fabulous too.) I was so happy and feeling so lucky. I tried to soak up the feelings since I probably won’t see him next until Monday night. But the lonely mood that had been brewing that day was gone, and I walked home happy.

Private Play

Published on March 12, 2011 in bdsm, cunt, D/s, forced orgasm, libido, masturbation, orgasm denial, orgasm on command, sex, sex toys, spanking, Uncategorized and wartenburg wheel. 0 Comments

After our night out, MasterDoc got busy with work and spending time with DeeDee before she went away for a few days again. Thursday evening I got him to myself, and to my delight we were both in playful moods.

Our sex isn’t always a serious, Dom/sub affair. MasterDoc has a sense of humor, a sense of silliness (as do I) and sometimes passionate touches can be followed shortly after with a silly face designed to make me laugh. While I like when he’s rough with me, I also treasure the times when he feels affectionate and sweet.

We fooled around a bit, and I played with my cunt as he watched closely. There’s something so hot about him laying at the end of the bed, perched in the perfect spot to see my spread legs and watch as I rub my cunt. His piercing gaze makes me feel so exposed. I was so horny that when he said, “I just wanna fuck,” I replied enthusiastically that that’s what I wanted as well. I wanted his cock inside me. I wanted to be fucked. I could dispense with the other trappings of bdsm for the evening.

Of course, he still spanks my ass a bit while fucking me from behind. But he fucked me so long and so hard that I couldn’t help but come – even before he gave permission. It was another in an ever-lengthening line of phenomenal sex we’ve had. I collapsed when he was done with me and was probably incoherent for the better part of a few minutes.

I was still randy, but MasterDoc had just worked a tremendous amount of hours over the past couple of days, so while I couldn’t hide my disappointment at not having more sex, I did acquiesce and try not to make a big deal out of it. The man is human and totally has a right to be too tired for extra sex after working so hard.

The next day he ensured I went home feeling content. He had plans in the evening with his playmate, so we didn’t fuck, but he made sure I came like crazy. He used the vampire gloves, the textured rubber gloves and the Wartenburg wheel on my body. I loved the sensations, but when it came time to come, I had a hard time doing it. The textured or spiked gloves can feel sensual, or they can feel uncomfortable. And since these sensations alternate, my trip to orgasm is not a straight line while playing with those toys.

But MasterDoc made sure I had some amazing orgasms before I left. He had me select a dildo for him to use on me, and he gave me the magic wand. I wasn’t allowed to turn the wand on at first, and he took to my thighs with a wooden ruler. He lubed up the dildo and slid it in to me. I was worked up by the time he let me switch the wand on (I like it on low most of the time.) As he fucked me with the dildo, and the vibrations danced on my clit, he reminded me that I had to ask permission to come. I tried teasing myself a little bit, but soon begged for orgasm. He made me hold off as I moaned in frustration. When he did let me come, it was a tremendous orgasm. I love when I lose all control while coming – I lose any sense of worrying that I may look stupid. I lose track of everything except my orgasm.

I went home feeling great.

Public Play #267

Published on March 9, 2011 in bdsm, blow jobs, cunt, D/s, exhibitionism, humiliation play, kink, masturbation, orgasm on command, piss play, sex, sex parties, sex toys, shio, spanking, squirting, submissive and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

I’m feeling back to normal again – hooray! When the depression finally lifted, I realized that it was as if I could suddenly feel the happiness in my life again. The happiness wasn’t gone last week, I just wasn’t capable of feeling it for a while. It’s a tremendous relief to be able to appreciate my life again. Mental illness can be debilitating in its own way.

Since I was off Tuesday, MasterDoc and I went out to the swing club Monday night. DeeDee was going to join us (and it’s been a long time since the three of us have been out together) but she felt more like staying in. I would have been happy for her to join us, but goodness knows that I love time alone with MasterDoc too.

We did our usual surveying of the scene when we got to the club, and I think we got busy pretty quickly. A couple of guys followed us into the room with the king bed and asked about our case of toys. Apparently at least one of them had heard about MasterDoc. He’s becoming quite a legend at the swing club. MasterDoc took the opportunity to put on a show – he explained the various toys, and ceremoniously put my collar on my neck. He then slowly stroked my face. I closed my eyes, focusing on his touch, my body twitching with pleasure every now and then. He showed off the control he has over me, and I was thrilled to let myself slip into subspace.

MasterDoc had me suck his cock, and he gave a flashlight to one of the guys so he could put me in the spotlight. As I licked and sucked, MasterDoc ordered me around in his best domly voice. “Oh yeah, that’s it. Suck it bitch!” I was glad to be his slut. I like how he gets to show off his control over me in front of other men. In a way, being a submissive lets me be just as slutty and dirty as I want to be, because it appears that I’m not the one deciding what I do. Let me clarify, while MasterDoc determines what and when we do things in a scene, he wouldn’t make me do something I can’t handle or wouldn’t consent to anyway. He certainly pushes my limits and gets me to do some things I don’t initially think I can handle, but my submission is given willingly. If I didn’t want to be a dirty slut sucking his cock in public I wouldn’t be with him and be his sub. Being a sub lets me be dirty under the guise of being “forced” to do it.

I love how vocal he is in public – I get much more feedback and dirty talk when people are around and he wants to emphasize the good job I’m doing. After some serious cocksucking, he had me take my pants off and kneel facing away from everyone. He toyed with my cunt. He spanked my ass. All the while, he was highlighting how I react to his touch. He told the guys that he takes me to the edge of coming, and then holds me there. He demonstrated, explaining that he could make me come at any time. I worried that I wouldn’t come on command. I’ve been struggling lately with my arousal ebbing more than it used to. Holding myself on the edge is not as easy as it was. I find myself not ready to come sometimes when he tells me to.

Luckily, at that moment I could tell when he was going to have me come, and I relaxed and let my body get worked up as he talked up my arousal. I came hard as he fingered me, and after what must have been a good solid 30 seconds of coming, I squirted all over the bed. The guy still had the flashlight, so I’m sure whomever was around could see quite well.

We cuddled and relaxed, arcing our bodies around either side of the puddle I left. It took a while for the guys to get the hint that the show was over – for now. I think MasterDoc intended to get up and walk around, but I stroked his face as we leaned our heads together, and we both got worked up again. I was on my knees, ass in the air, MasterDoc was ready to fuck me when… a guy walked in with a slice of cake. MasterDoc got distracted. He got the guy to get him cake (and a fork when he forgot the first time), and he started eating it while using my ass as a table. I craved some cake myself, plus my knees were starting to bother me. I asked if I could get up and I was allowed. MasterDoc fed me the bits of cake he decided to give me. The guy jokingly commented on “hey, who’s the dom here?” as MasterDoc fed me, but I pointed out that indeed, his feeding me was a dominant act since he controlled the food.

I wanted more cake and so I begged like a puppy, hoping the cuteness would get me some more cake. (I panted, holding my hands up like front paws. I eyed the cake and whined a little.) He had me beg some more, and then let me have a little cake. He was suddenly inspired to put the empty plate on the bed, and have me lick it clean like a dog. It’s funny since there was an audience, but I had no problem doing it.

We later walked in on one of the regular ladies playing with a new toy she just got (the cake was for her birthday). She declared that hooking the small vibe’s tip into her clit hood ring felt so good. A crowd formed to watch her masturbating while two guys stroked her body. MasterDoc had me get out the flashlight. He held it in his mouth so it shone on her pussy while he massaged her thighs. (The other guys were fairly clueless as to how to touch a woman, but MasterDoc said the guy on her other leg followed his lead well.) I didn’t see her coming head-on as my back was bothering me so I sat down on the other end of the bed. But I enjoyed watching MasterDoc work his skills. The lady came and squirted. We left when she started playing with one of the guys who had been touching her.

At one point in the evening, MasterDoc suggested he could piss in my mouth right there in a public area. My eyes got so wide! I was clothed, and I fretted as to “what if I spilled any?” MasterDoc assured me he’d let the urine flow slowly. I was freaked out. He teased me, but ultimately didn’t make me drink his piss there. (I’ve never actually drank it. There was just the one time he pissed in my mouth but he let me have it just flow out. But I know him, he’s working up to it.)

We played some more in the so-called “exhibitionists’ room” (now partially obscured by gauzy drapes). MasterDoc made me come with my Soraya vibe. I took over fucking myself with it so I could press the little “arm” into my clit. MasterDoc seemed to like how I took over fucking myself and coming. There was a crowd watching and again a guy to hold the flashlight. MasterDoc got hard and decided to fuck me. I got on top for a ride. I was feeling tired but I did my best. I focused on him feeling good, plus he gave my ass a few hard spanks that were hard enough to distract me from building my arousal. Sadly, I had a hard time coming when he told me to. Being miles away from orgasm when commanded to do it is such a disappointing experience. But then we started up fucking again soon after, and I did my best to focus and get into it – and I came hard the next time he gave the command.

(The number in the title is totally random, in case you were wondering.)