Archive for the 'sex parties' Category

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Rethinking Service

Published on March 14, 2011 in anxiety, bored, D/s, emotions, horny, libido, musings, non-monogamy, orgasm on command, poly, sex, sex parties, slump, stress, submissive, swinging and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

On Saturday night MasterDoc and I went out to the swing club. We rarely go on Saturday nights, and it’s a couples-only night. The vibe is completely different than the “single guys allowed” nights we usually go to. On our usual nights, putting on a show and indulging our exhibitionist tendencies is mostly what we do. We wouldn’t object to a couple to swing with, but we realize it’s less likely on those nights. We noticed that on couples’ night the couples are “better” (to our perception at least) than the couples who come on singles nights. (What does that say about us? Heh. We like to put on a show and have me groped by random guys.)

Early in the evening, while I was feeling distinctly in the mood for some Dom/sub type of play, I focused on being the loving girlfriend in the swing situation. We had a lovely time making out for a bit. I did my best to show off how good he makes me feel in case I could pique some lady’s interest.

It was nice, but we didn’t talk to any couples and none of them spoke to us. We’re both shyer than you would think. (Not shy about nudity, shy about talking.) I started to get rather bored. When we finally went off to fool around, I found it hard to get fully aroused. I enjoyed the sweet kissing and touching, but when MasterDoc tried to make me come I had to struggle to come a while after he gave permission. I had a bout of crankiness. I just couldn’t get into the evening and my inner brat came out. I wanted rough sex when gentle sex was on the menu. I was bored and totally didn’t handle the accompanying frustration well. MasterDoc gave me a stern talking to, and I did my best to refocus and enjoy the evening. I didn’t want to ruin it for either of us.

I struggled. I was disappointed that my evening was fairly sex-free when I was craving lots of bdsm and sex goodness. I wanted an evening of fucking – wherever we were. But the sex was slow to come. When MasterDoc did fuck me, I just couldn’t get into it. He was frustrated because he thinks that I mentally set myself up to not come. I don’t think I did that, at least not consciously. The sex hurt, which seems to happen now and then lately if my cunt isn’t well warmed up first, and my cervix in particular was hyper-sensitive. I did my best mentally to get into it, and I asked him not to go too deep, but there was no way in hell I could get aroused enough to come. He told me that in swing situations I can come at will, but even after hearing his voice tell me to come, I couldn’t. I couldn’t even get close. It was a miserable experience for both of us, not because I didn’t have an orgasm, but because fucking was downright unpleasant. Our fucking is rarely short of spectacular.

The next day we discussed things, and I was feeling self-righteous and angry over my perceived reduction in sex lately with MasterDoc. (He had spent the night before with a playmate of his. They went to the club and she slept over his place.) He explained that I don’t get less sex. I’m not entirely sure that’s true, at least not back in the days before he started seeing DeeDee and his current plethora of playmates. The discussion left me depressed (just mood-wise, not illness-wise), but I did try to not let it get to me. Over time, I had to admit to myself that it was bratty of me to have a fit the night before. I started to examine my attitudes towards service to my Dom. I started looking at how I react when I don’t get what I want right away. Delayed gratification has never been my strong point.

It’s easy to serve when it’s kinky and stimulating for me. It’s much harder to be patient when he goes off with others or the goal seems to be a swap rather than sex together. I’m all for serving when and how it suits me – but I struggle with other types of service. I’m probably not the first sub to have this problem, and if any of you have suggestions let me know. I struggle with things that seem to “take away” from my time with him. I found myself craving sexual submission on Saturday night, but that’s not what my Dom needed from me.

I need to find a friend with benefits for regular fucking to augment what I get with MasterDoc. And/or a service top to play with. MasterDoc is polyamorous and will always be, so if my 38-year-old libido needs more fucking, then I need to get additional fucking elsewhere. Perhaps if I was getting laid more often then I wouldn’t get so insecure, needy and cranky.

At any rate, I realized that I needed to work on my submissive service. I need to work on submitting when it’s hard. I did my best tonight to make things easier for DeeDee who just came home and has a bunch of furniture to move in. I made dinner and cleaned up so MasterDoc and DeeDee could get stuff done. It’s a small step, but I’m going to continue to examine my service skills.

On Sunday, we had sex twice and it was just as wonderful as usual.

Public Play #267

Published on March 9, 2011 in bdsm, blow jobs, cunt, D/s, exhibitionism, humiliation play, kink, masturbation, orgasm on command, piss play, sex, sex parties, sex toys, shio, spanking, squirting, submissive and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

I’m feeling back to normal again – hooray! When the depression finally lifted, I realized that it was as if I could suddenly feel the happiness in my life again. The happiness wasn’t gone last week, I just wasn’t capable of feeling it for a while. It’s a tremendous relief to be able to appreciate my life again. Mental illness can be debilitating in its own way.

Since I was off Tuesday, MasterDoc and I went out to the swing club Monday night. DeeDee was going to join us (and it’s been a long time since the three of us have been out together) but she felt more like staying in. I would have been happy for her to join us, but goodness knows that I love time alone with MasterDoc too.

We did our usual surveying of the scene when we got to the club, and I think we got busy pretty quickly. A couple of guys followed us into the room with the king bed and asked about our case of toys. Apparently at least one of them had heard about MasterDoc. He’s becoming quite a legend at the swing club. MasterDoc took the opportunity to put on a show – he explained the various toys, and ceremoniously put my collar on my neck. He then slowly stroked my face. I closed my eyes, focusing on his touch, my body twitching with pleasure every now and then. He showed off the control he has over me, and I was thrilled to let myself slip into subspace.

MasterDoc had me suck his cock, and he gave a flashlight to one of the guys so he could put me in the spotlight. As I licked and sucked, MasterDoc ordered me around in his best domly voice. “Oh yeah, that’s it. Suck it bitch!” I was glad to be his slut. I like how he gets to show off his control over me in front of other men. In a way, being a submissive lets me be just as slutty and dirty as I want to be, because it appears that I’m not the one deciding what I do. Let me clarify, while MasterDoc determines what and when we do things in a scene, he wouldn’t make me do something I can’t handle or wouldn’t consent to anyway. He certainly pushes my limits and gets me to do some things I don’t initially think I can handle, but my submission is given willingly. If I didn’t want to be a dirty slut sucking his cock in public I wouldn’t be with him and be his sub. Being a sub lets me be dirty under the guise of being “forced” to do it.

I love how vocal he is in public – I get much more feedback and dirty talk when people are around and he wants to emphasize the good job I’m doing. After some serious cocksucking, he had me take my pants off and kneel facing away from everyone. He toyed with my cunt. He spanked my ass. All the while, he was highlighting how I react to his touch. He told the guys that he takes me to the edge of coming, and then holds me there. He demonstrated, explaining that he could make me come at any time. I worried that I wouldn’t come on command. I’ve been struggling lately with my arousal ebbing more than it used to. Holding myself on the edge is not as easy as it was. I find myself not ready to come sometimes when he tells me to.

Luckily, at that moment I could tell when he was going to have me come, and I relaxed and let my body get worked up as he talked up my arousal. I came hard as he fingered me, and after what must have been a good solid 30 seconds of coming, I squirted all over the bed. The guy still had the flashlight, so I’m sure whomever was around could see quite well.

We cuddled and relaxed, arcing our bodies around either side of the puddle I left. It took a while for the guys to get the hint that the show was over – for now. I think MasterDoc intended to get up and walk around, but I stroked his face as we leaned our heads together, and we both got worked up again. I was on my knees, ass in the air, MasterDoc was ready to fuck me when… a guy walked in with a slice of cake. MasterDoc got distracted. He got the guy to get him cake (and a fork when he forgot the first time), and he started eating it while using my ass as a table. I craved some cake myself, plus my knees were starting to bother me. I asked if I could get up and I was allowed. MasterDoc fed me the bits of cake he decided to give me. The guy jokingly commented on “hey, who’s the dom here?” as MasterDoc fed me, but I pointed out that indeed, his feeding me was a dominant act since he controlled the food.

I wanted more cake and so I begged like a puppy, hoping the cuteness would get me some more cake. (I panted, holding my hands up like front paws. I eyed the cake and whined a little.) He had me beg some more, and then let me have a little cake. He was suddenly inspired to put the empty plate on the bed, and have me lick it clean like a dog. It’s funny since there was an audience, but I had no problem doing it.

We later walked in on one of the regular ladies playing with a new toy she just got (the cake was for her birthday). She declared that hooking the small vibe’s tip into her clit hood ring felt so good. A crowd formed to watch her masturbating while two guys stroked her body. MasterDoc had me get out the flashlight. He held it in his mouth so it shone on her pussy while he massaged her thighs. (The other guys were fairly clueless as to how to touch a woman, but MasterDoc said the guy on her other leg followed his lead well.) I didn’t see her coming head-on as my back was bothering me so I sat down on the other end of the bed. But I enjoyed watching MasterDoc work his skills. The lady came and squirted. We left when she started playing with one of the guys who had been touching her.

At one point in the evening, MasterDoc suggested he could piss in my mouth right there in a public area. My eyes got so wide! I was clothed, and I fretted as to “what if I spilled any?” MasterDoc assured me he’d let the urine flow slowly. I was freaked out. He teased me, but ultimately didn’t make me drink his piss there. (I’ve never actually drank it. There was just the one time he pissed in my mouth but he let me have it just flow out. But I know him, he’s working up to it.)

We played some more in the so-called “exhibitionists’ room” (now partially obscured by gauzy drapes). MasterDoc made me come with my Soraya vibe. I took over fucking myself with it so I could press the little “arm” into my clit. MasterDoc seemed to like how I took over fucking myself and coming. There was a crowd watching and again a guy to hold the flashlight. MasterDoc got hard and decided to fuck me. I got on top for a ride. I was feeling tired but I did my best. I focused on him feeling good, plus he gave my ass a few hard spanks that were hard enough to distract me from building my arousal. Sadly, I had a hard time coming when he told me to. Being miles away from orgasm when commanded to do it is such a disappointing experience. But then we started up fucking again soon after, and I did my best to focus and get into it – and I came hard the next time he gave the command.

(The number in the title is totally random, in case you were wondering.)

MasterDoc and Nadia Go Out

Published on March 2, 2011 in bdsm, blow jobs, cunt, D/s, dom, exhibitionism, forced orgasm, horny, kink, orgasm denial, orgasm on command, sex, sex parties, shio, spanking, squirting, stupid people, submissive and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

After a quiet week sexually (a bad cold for much of the week curbed activity), I went out to the swing club with MasterDoc last Friday. I was ragingly horny before we even headed out. I was ripe for all sorts of (consensual) sexual violation. As we got ready, I snuggled up to him and grabbed his ass.

I felt excited and proud to be his slut. I dressed in lingerie that had just come in the mail – a chemise of black lace over hot pink. The back was entirely mesh. I combined this with my over the knee boots for walking around the club. New panties – pink mesh on the back, purple nylon for the front – were taken off and put on repeatedly through the night.

MasterDoc took me into the back room by the St. Andrew’s Cross. We had brought my cuffs for use with it, but in the end they never got used. I held myself up, leaning against the cross. He spanked me a little, then got down and dirty with my cunt. As he made me come I struggled to remain standing. My hands nearly dug into the wood in an attempt to counteract my knees going weak. It was wonderful to come for the first time in a few days, but I really didn’t have the strength to stand up for it. I told MasterDoc the trouble I was having and he got me to lay down on a bed to rest.

A short while later, he made me come in front of a couple of guys who had come into the room. I was a little (ok, a lot) annoyed by these guys’ unasked pressing against me. MasterDoc shooed them back a few inches. As MasterDoc’s skilled hands did their thing he gave me permission to come. I squirted, which the guys seemed to enjoy. In the aftermath of such pleasure, I sucked MasterDoc’s cock for a while. Worked up, he had me get on all fours and he fucked me but good – making me scream as I came and he continued to pound me. It was a truly epic round of sex. I got annoyed by a couple of guys talking near me, it distracted me from my orgasms. I really wanted to tell them to shut the fuck up. Someone else came in and talked with us which was bad timing as well. I really miss how considerate kink people are about scenes than swingers. I hate when my subspace is broken by some idiot trying to chat us up at a clearly (to me anyway, to anyone with half a brain) intimate moment.

Still, that fuck was amazing. I think if I had met MasterDoc 10 years earlier I’d have had a heart attack from the sex. We recovered as the older couple who seems to ALWAYS be there started fooling around on the bed across the room. There’s definitely an interest on their side, but I’m really not into the guy (not much into the woman but the guy creeps me out somehow).

We took a break and ended up talking with a guy in the smoking area. He had seen MasterDoc at the club before with other women. (I felt pride at how my unassuming Dom is “the man” at the swing club. Guys call out, “Hi Doc!’ to him, probably in the hopes of getting in on his action.) The guy we chatted with was nice and displayed a genuine interest in kink.

Next, we took over the king-sized bed. MasterDoc spanked me and made me come, for a change my ass was towards the door rather than my face. He did this floppy hands thing he’s done various times lately. (He slaps and rubs my cunt in a very general fashion, not targeting my clit or other desirable bits.) It drives me bonkers at it makes it hard to come. I spoke to him about it afterward, and he said that he does it intentionally to make me really work for the orgasm. Argh. Frustration. But in light of our discussion, he conceded that maybe he’s done it too much lately.

I got to suck his cock some more. (I love it!) If my damn mouth and jaw didn’t get tired I could suck his cock for hours.

After another break, we set up in the exhibitionists’ room. MasterDoc handed the flashlight to the guy we spoke to earlier. He held it shining at my pussy while MasterDoc fingered me to fabulous orgasm. Damn, I’m one lucky slut.

The club was busy by the time we thought about leaving. MasterDoc was considering staying to get into the act with an attractive Asian lady who was doing four guys. I would have waited patiently for him (probably watched as well!) but he opted to take me home.

A Little Public Humilation

Published on February 19, 2011 in bdsm, blow jobs, cunt, D/s, embarrassment, exhibitionism, happy, humiliation play, orgasm on command, sex, sex parties, sex toys, shio, slut, spanking, squirting and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

About a week ago, we went to the swing club for the first time in a while (at least, it was the first time in a while I was able to go with him). As soon as we walked in the door to the main room, he grabbed me and grabbed my crotch in front of everyone. I don’t recall his words but I think he said something about me being ready to get fucked loud enough for others to hear. It was the start of what has been a streak of kinky humiliation. I buried my face in his shoulder in embarrassment but at the same time I was smiling, and oh so turned on.

As usual, we hung out for a bit in the lounge area of the club. I enjoyed watching guys try to start up a conversation with MasterDoc by asking about our case of toys. I felt proud to think that my Dom was the envy of other guys there. He was there with an attractive woman, a bag full of sex toys and clearly he was going to have a good time. The single guys hoped to get a chance to be a part of that.

That night, I thought about how getting the librarian-looking, average girl to do hot nasty things has a certain cachet to it. Slutty-looking women are expected to be slutty (whether they are or not, sadly) but average-looking women aren’t expected to be wildcats in bed. Often something being sexually hot has a lot to do with how taboo or contradictory it seems. The nice, respectable, educated woman you can bring home to mom isn’t expected to be your fucktoy in public at a swing club. I enjoy being that unexpected woman.

We spoke to the bartender, who was serving as eye candy too in her little bikini. In the midst of this, MasterDoc grabbed me and made me come standing up, right there, as he continued talking. He grabbed me by the hair and placed his hand under my slip and firmly on my cunt. I can’t remember how many people saw, but I was reduced to quivering orgasm in less than a minute. This was more hot humiliation. My panties ended up soaking wet. I love when he takes control of me like that.

When we got down to business on a bed I enthusiastically sucked and savored his cock. Single guys watched of course. I love helping make MasterDoc the envy of all the single men there.

He had me get on all fours facing towards the door and then proceeded to make me come with a vibrator. I keep coming harder and harder lately. Orgasm has becoming something transcendent.

We took a break, but when we got back to bed later he fucked me from behind after giving a spanking. (A lady later commented that she enjoyed the show but not the hitting. MasterDoc pointed out that he only does that with women who like it.) As always he made sure my head was pointed towards the door, and whomever may be watching. He told me to do something he doesn’t do often – I was instructed to come as soon as he put his cock in me. This was easy to accomplish and I squirted again. Don’t worry, out of proper etiquette I took the wet sheets to the hamper afterward so no one else would have to deal with my come. I could hear men murmuring their appreciation of the scene while MasterDoc fucked me silly.

He had me suck his cock some more and this just made me want more cock. I asked nicely if I could have more, and he let me get on for a ride. Again, the crowd seemed to like it.

This evening was an amazing ending to what had been a day of dissatisfaction and depression. After our night out I was so very happy, and so very sorry for always finding fault and something to bitch about. MasterDoc was perfectly charming from the start of the evening. As we waited for the elevator when we got there, he turned on his silly, charming side and danced around me, saying he was spinning his web around me. Sometimes he just is so cute and turns me to mush.

Fantasy Vignettes

Published on January 4, 2011 in bdsm, blow jobs, bondage, caning, consensual non-consent, D/s, edge play, exhibitionism, fantasy, gags, gang bang, horny, humiliation play, kink, masochism, masturbation, piss play, restraints, sadism, sex, sex parties, shio, slut, spanking, squirting, submissive, swinging and Uncategorized. 2 Comments

Scene 1: I’ve been kidnapped and I awaken tied up, naked, wrists and ankles bound, duct tape across my mouth. He teases and tantalizes my body despite my protests. My nipples receive the clover clamps. He grabs me by the hair and makes me suck his cock after he rips the tape off. He makes me come over and over despite my fighting it. He fucks me while I’m unable to get away because I’m bound.

Scene 2: Struggling with him, fighting him off. Him calling me a whore and other degrading things. Him slapping me around. Him spanking me even when I start getting desperate for him to stop. He could just gag me with duct tape and go to town on my ass with the cane. I could lay over the axis for the beating, and then be in just the right position for a fucking.

Scene 3: He fucks my mouth as I hang my head off the end of the bed. He gags me repeatedly on his cock. At the end, he comes all over my face.

Scene 4: He blindfolds me and lets all sorts of people at the swing club play with me and fuck me. I don’t get to know who fucked me.

Scene 5: I’m intoxicated to the edge of sleep and then fucked repeatedly by a group of men, all orchestrated by MasterDoc. This would be videotaped so I could fully enjoy after.

Scene 6: I have to do my best to move around and do things like suck his cock while my arms are restrained behind my back.

Scene 7: I become his slave for a few hours. I have to sit at his feet. I have to be always respectful or I get the cane. He would use me as he likes sexually. He can make me sit in the corner or tie me to something at a whim. I’d have to get his permission to use the toilet. He would make me wait until I was desperate and begging for it, and then he’d bring me (by leash perhaps?) into the bathroom, where he’d let me pee in the tub through my panties.

Scene 8: I ‘m bound at a party at his place (possibly just hands behind back or perhaps some ankle restraint as well so I have to shuffle along as I walk) and the guests get to play with my naked body as it pleases them. My hands are released for dinner but I have to eat mine out of a bowl on the floor, seated next to his chair, while the guests eat at the table. He later makes me masturbate to orgasm in front of the crowd. With a little luck, I squirt when I come.

School Girl Night

Published on December 22, 2010 in bdsm, bisexuality, blow jobs, cunnilingus, D/s, exhibitionism, illness, kink, masochism, orgasm on command, sadism, sex, sex parties, sex toys, slut, spanking, swinging, sybian, threesome, Uncategorized and wartenburg wheel. 1 Comment

I went out to a fetish party Friday night with MasterDoc. I should probably have stayed at home since I was mildly sick, but I went just the same and have some fantastic memories. The memories will have to sustain me while I recover from getting more sick. Hopefully I haven’t gotten more people ill! It has taken me days to complete this post because I’ve just been too tired to think.

It was the usual monthly fetish party we go to, we’re gradually getting to know people and become more friendly with others which definitely improves the party. Blondie came too, and didn’t bring a play partner along like she was going to initially. I got to play with her while MasterDoc gave sybian rides and that was great. Sitting around bored sucks, having fun at a party is much better.

Also, a woman I had been talking to for about one day on a dating site mentioned going to a fetish party, and upon asking I found it was the same one I was going to. I invited her to say hello which she did. Turns out she’s quite the enthusiastic slut but I didn’t do anything with her. Unfortunately she distracted me from playing with Blondie’s tits while MasterDoc gave her a sybian ride.

I flirted some more with Sofija (as I always do at these parties) and yearned for her strap on. I grabbed at it and played around with it. I manage to flirt openly with her because the flirtation is always returned. As she hung on the shoulder of an older guy, someone different than the many other people I’ve seen her flirting with and hanging on, I told her I think she’s an even bigger slut than I am. She couldn’t deny it. Of course it’s frustrating to know this sexy woman is a slut and yet she still hasn’t done me!

Or, hadn’t done me. I’ll get to that in a bit.

I had a particularly good time since I got attention from both MasterDoc and Blondie. The two of them had me bend over a sofa in my schoolgirl outfit (there was a schoolgirl/littles kind of theme) and gave me a joint spanking. MasterDoc slipped his hand between my legs so he could hold my Lelo Siri by my clit. All the stimulation got me worked up in no time, and when MasterDoc gave me the command I came. The orgasm came to a bit of a premature end because the spanking I was getting from Blondie hurt just a little too much. While I’m a masochist, I don’t have a high pain tolerance.

I watched MasterDoc give a few sybian rides. The party host wanted one of his ladies to ride it but face the crowd. MasterDoc likes the intimacy of giving a face-to-face sybian ride, but, ever the gentleman, he did as asked. Luckily I had a stroke of inspiration and started sucking his cock while he ran the controls. Picture a hot lady riding the sybian on the floor, while MasterDoc and I sit behind her on a sofa, and I reach over to pull his cock out of his pants and start sucking it. He’s running the sybian controls over my head as I blow him.

Blondie was interested in playing and MasterDoc was happy for me to be kept busy. She took me off to a dark corner and sat me down in a wooden chair. She unbuttoned and opened my white blouse and took my tits out of my bra. (I wore white lace underwear in keeping with the schoolgirl theme.) She has a bit of a fetish for breasts hanging out of a bra that is otherwise still on. It’s certainly an easy fetish to indulge, and I find being half-dressed to be pretty sexy as well. She used our toys and ran the wartenburg wheel over my tits. Gently and then pressing hard now and then. She is definitely capable of giving more pain than I can handle. I’ll be happy for her to use that sadism on men (or women) other than me! As she touched and ran the wheel over me I twitched excitedly. She asked if I had something inside me but no, I was aroused by just the non-genital stimulation I was getting. She tucked the Siri snug into my panties so it buzzed against my clit. MasterDoc joined us and I got to come again. Lucky me!

Blondie and MasterDoc placed me over a spanking bench (unfortunately not padded!) and she started in on role playing, something MasterDoc and I don’t really do much of. She took up the naughty school girl theme, telling me she saw me on the playground lifting my skirt and showing myself to those men. She gave me a spanking for being such a naughty girl. MasterDoc, meanwhile, got the host to snag Sofija – finally she was going to use her strap on on me! I was placed kneeling on a bed, and Sofija fucked me with the dildo, first in her strap on harness, then when it came out of the harness (it’s my pussy of steel ya know) she fucked me with it using her hand. Blondie meanwhile sat in front of me with one of my dildoes and told me to suck it. MasterDoc orchestrated the whole thing and I came so hard when he told me to. I kept coming and coming and couldn’t stop. My abdominal muscles were sore after! I lay on my back to recover and I twitched for a while at even the most innocuous touch.

Blondie had to get going, so MasterDoc walked her to the subway. When he came back the party host had two, hot 18 year old women ready to ride the sybian. One went on the sybian while the other sat in front of her on a chair. The woman on the sybian ate the other girl out. Needless to say, the young hotties garnered much attention. Later, they switched roles. I marveled at how being young and in shape enables a woman to hold her legs up for a long time. I would have had to put mine down much faster. Both of these ladies were adorable and the stuff of porn movies. Seriously, it should have been filmed.

We stumbled out of there late, and I was more exhausted than I’d ever been. The next morning when I woke up to body aches in addition to the runny nose I had the day before, I knew that I had pushed myself too much by going out. But so long as I haven’t done any harm to anyone else, it was worth it.

Being the Out-of-Towners

Published on December 10, 2010 in anal, blow jobs, D/s, exhibitionism, musings, orgasm denial, orgasm on command, sex, sex parties, shio, squirting, swinging, Uncategorized and vacation. 2 Comments

If you follow my twitter you know that MasterDoc and I went away on our first vacation together this week. We had a blast at Disney World and even managed to visit a local swing club while in Orlando.

I don’t think I had been to a swing club outside of New York City before, so the differences are interesting to me. In NYC, clubs are small because real estate is so costly. The club we visited last night was in an entire house. The privacy was great since it was down a lonesome road, and the driveway is gated off unless they’re open – not to mention the driveway from the road is long-ish. The first room you enter is a bar area with a pool table, stripper pole and seating. Soft drinks are provided as are cups and ice (unlike NYC you just serve yourself). There’s a sign telling you what your cup color means there – clear means you’re just mingling, red means you’re looking for a couple and orange means you’re looking for singles. It’s a nice way to communicate what you’re looking for on a given night.

The club was huge being the whole of a one floor house. The kitchen had snacks (very little since it was a weeknight – more on weekends), each room had clean sheets and towels handy (and a laundry basket for you to put used ones in). In NYC we usually have to get a staff person to change soaked sheets, but this place was more down to earth. I was concerned that no condoms were available – MasterDoc pointed out that condom use isn’t necessarily universal. I don’t like that notion. I hope it was just that they expected people to bring their own. We had brought our own condoms and lube. There were many rooms, many beds and three hot tubs (two outside on back deck and one interior tub), a sex swing, and two sybians. The guy working that night was very nice and gracious in that Southern way. I have to confess that like some Yankees, I have a stereotyped view of Southerners much of the time. I know it isn’t fair because the stereotype – ignorant, redneck, racists – is only going to be true a small portion of the time. Interestingly, there was far more interracial porn (and black porn) showing there than in the club we frequent in NYC (where there’s usually only white porn.) While the guests were predominantly white, there was an Asian guy, a south Asian couple and a black guy. Everyone seemed equally welcome.

Despite my stupid stereotyped idea of Southerners, (which IS totally stupid as I’ve known and adored various Southerners who are not anything like that stereotype) I have to admit that I do admire the southern hospitality and graciousness. Manners were far better and far more adhered to in Florida than they are in New York. I certainly had to look at my stereotypes and look at how culturally the region is different from where I’ve always lived in the northeast. Not better or worse, just different.

One nice thing was that the single guys were far more polite than in NYC. There were few couples there, and unfortunately the only couple that seemed interested was a couple MasterDoc wasn’t interested in. We ended up making our own fun, which you know we’re quite good at. Early in the evening, MasterDoc fucked me doggy style in one of the rooms. While I was busy being fucked a couple came in to watch appreciatively. MasterDoc teased me like he’s been doing lately – fucking me hard and pushing me towards orgasm. While I don’t ever want to give in and come without permission, part of me hopes that it accidentally happens since I’m so desperate for release by the time he lets me come. I came hard, and squirted all over the sheets. I could feel myself drench MasterDoc’s hand after he switched to fingering me while I came. I changed the sheets after.

A little later, when it was becoming more apparent that we weren’t likely to swap that night, MasterDoc decided to fuck me up the ass – something we haven’t done often in recent months. He lubed me up and talked dirty to me the whole time. He emphasized that he was going to fuck me up my tight asshole like the whore that I am. *swoon* He managed to push past my sphincter and gave me a good fucking. I needed extra lube (remember kids, you can never have too much lube during anal). Again he teased me, pushing me towards orgasm through fucking my ass. He let me come and it felt great to come again (and again). A little later he fucked me vaginally again and let a couple of the single guys touch my upper half while he did so. I was lost in pleasure. I love when I’m getting fucked (cock, fingers, dildo, or otherwise) and I lose track of everything around me. He fucked me into a state of frenzy again and let me come. What a fabulous night!

I sucked his cock a lot and seemed to be doing a really good job of it. I love making him twitch with pleasure. I deep throated him a lot and the blow jobs got all nice and wet. I’m getting much better at controlling my gag reflex. I can feel his cock head at the back of my throat and I focus on relaxing and leaving it there pressed against my throat. At those moments MasterDoc seems to be overcome with feeling good.

I was tired before it was all that late – having done so much walking and standing the past few days left me wiped out. (Wednesday night I was too tired for sex. Yes, you read that right. I crashed early and slept a long time. We fooled around a little on Tuesday night but I was pretty damn tired so I had to collapse and sleep before we had really done what we wanted to.) I felt satisfied and not interested in more sex, but I kept my opinion to myself and kept blowing MasterDoc on command like a good submissive. I did admit I was tired, but he wanted to come and I was happy to help him get there. I whispered in this ear about hot things we had done that night and I played with his groin and inner thighs. I licked his thighs for him and kept on going until he came. It was fantastic.

We bid the kind swingers of Orlando good night, and headed back to our hotel room. MasterDoc had hoped for more debauchery during our time away (like meeting a couple for a swap) but between fatigue and the constraints of time we didn’t get a chance. Still, it was a good vacation.

Super Slut

Published on December 6, 2010 in bdsm, blow jobs, bondage, D/s, DeeDee, exhibitionism, kink, non-monogamy, restraints, sex, sex parties, sex toys, shio, slut, spanking, squirting, swinging and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

DeeDee was out for the day, helping a friend. So I got some alone time with MasterDoc. I was horny and hoping for a fucking, but I have to admit I was pretty damn happy with what I got. I just got a magic wand controller for review (a rheostat) and we tried it out for its first run. (Review to come later. ) MasterDoc delighted my bondage-loving self by securing me to the bed with the under bed restraints. He teased me for a while considering the controller gave him even more fine-tuned control over the magic wand. (But it doesn’t dial up to the highest wand setting. Totally weird.) When he first pressed the wand to my cunt, I wasn’t wet yet so it hurt sometimes. He tried to push me to coming but I wasn’t ready when he gave permission. I kinda looked at him hopelessly, as if to say I wanted to come but just couldn’t. He pressed on (literally) and before long he had me coming hard. He made me come over and over (squirting like crazy) and left me exhausted after. I was in a happy place and he let me know that it’s good I found my happy place that afternoon as DeeDee was going to be his focus at the party we were going to that night. (She had been away recently and he and I were leaving shortly for a trip together.) I negotiated with him what I could do at the party. I made the point of saying that if I had freedom to go and make my own fun, I don’t mind not being his focus. He granted me permission to fuck without immediately getting his permission before doing so. I pointed out that I would be going in a different head space than usual – instead of docile sub looking to him for all the decisions, I would be in charge of myself and my safety. I would be in charge of speaking up if I didn’t want to do something. Armed with the right mindset I didn’t mind being there semi-solo.

Sometimes I forget the early days when I went to my first sex parties. I went as a single woman and had a fabulous time just fucking as much as I wanted to. While I love being MasterDoc’s sub and slut, I do like having the autonomy from time to time to grab my sexual desires by the lapel. As I got dressed I felt like I was totally hot shit with the weight loss (and my new over-the-knee boots). I’m not usually confident like that, and it felt good.

At the party my usual social anxiety turned up as my being negative about the party. I complained that I was so much younger than most people there. I try not to be ageist (I will be in my 50s + soon enough!) but I mostly go for people my own age sexually. As you know from my relationship with MasterDoc, however, everything has an exception. It’s a matter of clicking with someone and feeling safe around them. After I had a few drinks I loosened up. I got flirty with a guy I was eying since I walked in and he had immediately introduced himself (and got me a drink). We popped down to the basement to see if the violet wand play was still going on. It wasn’t and he and I started making out. (Funny story: MasterDoc went to the basement at the same time to give a sybian ride to someone. He saw this couple making out and thought “Rowr! She’s hot. I gotta get Nadia and DeeDee so I can set up a swap and get with her.” Of course, that “her” was me. Since losing weight I suppose I looked different. It’s incredibly awesome to know that the regular man in your life still thinks you’re hot.)

The guy I was with suggested going upstairs to find somewhere to sit. I suggested we find somewhere to lay down.

Yes, I’m a huge slut. What of it?

As we started making out on the mattress laid on the floor in one of the bedrooms, I discovered his leanings are dominant. Oh boy, we know how weak dominant sex partners make me! There was hair pulling, kissing, fingering me good and hard. I came over and over and over. I’m pretty sure the whole house could hear me (if not the whole neighborhood). He encouraged me to scream. I don’t need much encouragement.

He was good at making me come just as long as he wanted. I’m sure MasterDoc’s work on sensitizing me has a lot to do with it, but I was somewhat dismayed to find there’s more than one man who can force me to orgasm. Why, you may ask? Because as much as I love coming being pushed to the ends of my endurance and be so difficult.

After a million orgasms for me, and a quick cuddle, I gave this guy the best blow job I could and he loved it. When he said he was ready to come I finished him off with my hands (I don’t let guys come in my mouth until I know them really well.) It was a successful interlude I must say.

I got a break from coming and got more food. I ended up chatting with a variety of people (particularly about sex in the library) and then again with the guy I had fooled around with. He seemed smitten. It was nice to experience. He suggested going upstairs to watch whatever might be going on. Alas, DeeDee was resting and MasterDoc was in the loo. But after a bit MasterDoc could be found spanking and fingering the hostess. I watched some and got really hot again. The guy told me to get on my knees and like the slut that I am I knelt and blew him in the hallway.

I said good night to that guy a little later, and started flirting with the hot young guy there (who has a big cock. His scene name reflects his cock size.). I was relaxing on the bed in the next bedroom and the male host of the party started my stroking thighs. He did that dom sort of feeling out a situation by starting to play with my thighs. When I didn’t object he went further. He finger fucked me and jeez my pussy was sore the next day. He fucked me, and the hot guy with the big cock came up behind my head on the bed. I got to enjoy cock choking as my head hung off the bed with him sliding his cock deep into my throat. I was doing so much choking that my nose was runny, my eyes tearing, and my hair a complete mess. I certainly looked like a used slut. Mr. Big Cock fucked me from behind, until I apparently got dry. “Dammit just use lube,” I thought.

I had a great time. MasterDoc came in and fucked me at one point, doggy style, and I loved having him join in. I sucked the host’s cock while stroking Mr. Big Cock with one hand. I was the epitome of slutiness. And I was enjoying every second. I got to come some more with MasterDoc’s permission, and the guys by my face wouldn’t let me get away with sliding off into orgasm and forgetting to suck cock. That in itself was pretty hot.

I wanted Mr. Big Cock to fuck me again, and he had me blow him. The blow job seemed to go on and on and he didn’t get around to fucking me again. He spanked me, it was lacking a little finesse but it made me come. By this time I was thoroughly exhausted. I was so glad to go home. The next morning my stomach muscles were sore from coming so much.

I had a great time.

Happy Birthday and then the Rest

Published on November 21, 2010 in anxiety, bdsm, bored, caning, D/s, DeeDee, depression, exhibitionism, happy, humiliation play, kink, musings, orgasm on command, poly, sex, sex parties, sex toys, slump, spanking, sybian, Uncategorized and venting. 0 Comments

I had a wonderful birthday. Well, maybe not the time spent at work (this week sucked in that area), but MasterDoc really put effort into my birthday this year – something he usually doesn’t make a priority. (That’s everyone’s birthdays, not just mine. He’s not into birthdays or holidays.) Since he knows a little special treatment on my birthday means a lot to me, he went out of his way to make me happy. And I really appreciate it.

He took some time off from work to spend with me that evening, and then took DeeDee and I out for dinner at a nice Indian restaurant. (I voted to have her join us when he asked if I wanted that.) After dinner, we went back to his place and DeeDee settled down with the tv while I got some alone time with MasterDoc.

He had bought me a present and as soon as I saw the box – a Lelo box! – I was bowled over. I got the widest grin on my face and held the box close to me. He got me the Siri that I’ve been going on about wanting. He paid attention and got me something I so very much wanted and this touched me. (I LOVE the toy so far. Will keep me busy while I send my Gigi off for repair. It has suddenly started vibrating really loud and rattling.)

I got to use it that evening, and it is nice and intensely buzzy. He made me come a bunch of times – some by verbal command only, some by physical stimulation, some by fucking. He was very sweet and I found myself thinking, “Our dynamic hasn’t changed just because it’s my birthday. Make me suck your cock! Beat me!” I had asked specifically for a birthday spanking earlier in the day and I perked up when he gave me quite an intense spanking, one stroke for every year of my life and one to grow on. (Yeah, that was my idea when we had been talking earlier.) I really had a lovely time with him that evening.

The next night we went to the party where we were expected to do the coming on command thing. DeeDee was really nervous about doing it in front of a crowd, I was less so, but I can’t honestly say I wasn’t at all nervous. I know I’m incredibly conditioned at this point, but I was nervous nonetheless. MasterDoc got everyone’s attention. I had a blindfold on by then because I really just couldn’t look at the people. He explained what he was going to do, and then ran his fingers through mine and DeeDee’s hair as we sat on either side of him on a sofa. He gave the command, and despite our nerves we both came. I’m sure it was something to see. Even so, I’m glad I didn’t have to see the crowd around us.

Unfortunately, the party was uneven and I ended up feeling fairly frustrated and bored. The place was a decent space except it was freakin’ cold. I didn’t take my heavy cardigan off all evening. MasterDoc did cane, spank and make DeeDee and I come at the same time, our asses in the air. It was fun, but my mood was pretty dark.

I did manage to be a good sub for a change, and that night I kept quiet and positive as best I could. I felt tired and wanted to leave, but since MasterDoc brought the sybian (our entry fee) we had to hang out while the party host had various women take a ride. I was ready to leave a couple of hours before we actually got the chance to.

While my remembrance of that evening is pretty negative, I suppose there were many positives. I got to see someone very skilled do fire play. I was impressed by his focus and understanding of keeping the play safe yet stimulating. Our friend V. went to the party with us and she got the chance to do fire play with that gentleman a little later. I also had nice chats with various friendly perverts – the people who go to these parties are usually quite cool. I got to see Sofija a bit but she wasn’t feeling well.

But all in all, the party was a dud for me. I didn’t even want a sybian ride by the time it was offered. I just wanted something to eat and to go home.

MasterDoc treated us to the diner after, and this was a nice treat. V. came with us and it was definitely nice to hang out with her, even if the party wasn’t the best. I’m trying to be positive here. I was a total negative Nadia earlier today so I’m doing my best to perk up. But an evening alone wasn’t what was planned so I’m pretty bummed that’s how things ended up tonight. Shit happens, but it’s still frustrating and disappointing.

I wish this entry had more zing (and/or orgasms!) but I’m not feeling it tonight. Kinda like how we all felt at that party last night. I suppose not every day can be filled with magical bdsm orgasmic enchantment.

C’est la vie.

The Next Steps?

Published on November 11, 2010 in analingus, bdsm, bondage, D/s, dom, emotions, gang bang, humiliation play, kink, masochism, musings, piss play, restraints, sex parties, submissive, swinging, trust, Uncategorized and wishing box. 1 Comment

As my D/s relationship with MasterDoc develops, the focus can change over time. When I first met him of course the focus was teaching me precisely how he likes to be pleasured, getting me to remember to say “Sir,” and training my ability to come at his command. On the service side of things he taught me what chores he wants me to do, and how to prepare things how he likes them, etc.

Recently I’ve felt like there’s a shift – the shift hasn’t happened just yet but it feels like a new phase of our relationship is ready to begin. I’ve been contemplating for at least a week now telling him that if he wants me to lick his ass, then I would respect him even more if he made me do it despite my dislike of the activity. I think I’m at the point now where him making me do a few things I dislike (but know full well won’t harm me) is the way to go. Not so much to exercise power, but I think he, as the Dom, should feel free to engage in whatever experiences he would like to – and not give as much concern over what I like to do.* Of course, I’ve hesitated to say anything because I’m worried this is a case of “be careful of what you wish for!” But I feel like I need to take another step into being his submissive on perhaps a deeper level than before. We’re at a point where if he makes me lick his ass I’m not going to consider leaving him. If he pisses in my mouth I’m not going to leave him. I don’t like these activities and hope they don’t become frequent, but I feel like if he’s the Dom then he should use me as he likes.

We’ve watched a lot of porn on theupperfloor.com lately and it’s been giving him all sorts of ideas. The forced exercise I found too painful to watch. I hate exercise but can handle it better if I’m doing it by myself and of my own volition. But the scene where the slave was hooded (and therefore couldn’t see) and forced to scrub the floor while the dominant whipped or fingered her – that was damn hot. Just scrubbing a floor isn’t hot to me. But being in some sort of bondage/blindfolding/gagging and being watched over by the man who delivers such delicious torment to me, that would be hot.

The Upper Floor has also made me crave kinky parties where I could serve and be toyed with by the guests freely. Not only toyed with but perhaps also gang-banged.

MasterDoc and I talked briefly about the idea of things like positions the sub needs to learn and use in certain situations. He was never into that, but I’ve been curious about it and now feels like a time to maybe delve into some of that, to maybe have a little more protocol than we currently have? (We’ve never been big on protocol other than calling him Sir and being respectful and obedient.) I’m also wishing for more bondage in my life.

All this is dependent on what MasterDoc wants and thinks is right. I’m merely expressing my willingness and desire to go a little further into submission and service to him. I feel like I need to be pushed a little.

* This meaning that of course I hope my needs will still be met, but I think he should feel more latitude in making me satisfy his needs even if I find an act distasteful.