Archive for the 'masturbation' Category

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Fantasy Vignettes

Published on January 4, 2011 in bdsm, blow jobs, bondage, caning, consensual non-consent, D/s, edge play, exhibitionism, fantasy, gags, gang bang, horny, humiliation play, kink, masochism, masturbation, piss play, restraints, sadism, sex, sex parties, shio, slut, spanking, squirting, submissive, swinging and Uncategorized. 2 Comments

Scene 1: I’ve been kidnapped and I awaken tied up, naked, wrists and ankles bound, duct tape across my mouth. He teases and tantalizes my body despite my protests. My nipples receive the clover clamps. He grabs me by the hair and makes me suck his cock after he rips the tape off. He makes me come over and over despite my fighting it. He fucks me while I’m unable to get away because I’m bound.

Scene 2: Struggling with him, fighting him off. Him calling me a whore and other degrading things. Him slapping me around. Him spanking me even when I start getting desperate for him to stop. He could just gag me with duct tape and go to town on my ass with the cane. I could lay over the axis for the beating, and then be in just the right position for a fucking.

Scene 3: He fucks my mouth as I hang my head off the end of the bed. He gags me repeatedly on his cock. At the end, he comes all over my face.

Scene 4: He blindfolds me and lets all sorts of people at the swing club play with me and fuck me. I don’t get to know who fucked me.

Scene 5: I’m intoxicated to the edge of sleep and then fucked repeatedly by a group of men, all orchestrated by MasterDoc. This would be videotaped so I could fully enjoy after.

Scene 6: I have to do my best to move around and do things like suck his cock while my arms are restrained behind my back.

Scene 7: I become his slave for a few hours. I have to sit at his feet. I have to be always respectful or I get the cane. He would use me as he likes sexually. He can make me sit in the corner or tie me to something at a whim. I’d have to get his permission to use the toilet. He would make me wait until I was desperate and begging for it, and then he’d bring me (by leash perhaps?) into the bathroom, where he’d let me pee in the tub through my panties.

Scene 8: I ‘m bound at a party at his place (possibly just hands behind back or perhaps some ankle restraint as well so I have to shuffle along as I walk) and the guests get to play with my naked body as it pleases them. My hands are released for dinner but I have to eat mine out of a bowl on the floor, seated next to his chair, while the guests eat at the table. He later makes me masturbate to orgasm in front of the crowd. With a little luck, I squirt when I come.

Solo

Published on December 2, 2010 in D/s, dom, masturbation, porn, sex toys, shio, squirting and Uncategorized. 1 Comment

I’m to report my masturbation sessions to MasterDoc. He has also recently mandated that I masturbate at least once (preferably twice) a week since I wasn’t doing much solo exploration. I’m not sure why I’m off masturbation lately. When I was a teenager without a partner I would masturbate a few times a day sometimes! I would make dates with myself to spend a long time masturbating.

Perhaps it’s because I get so much fantastic sex now that I don’t need to masturbate? I don’t know if that’s entirely true since I do get horny when I’m on my own. I’m just not usually willing to take the time to set up the scene when it’s just myself. And being a squirter, I do have to “set up” before masturbation. Throe. Lube. Vibe of some sort. Possibly porn.

Tonight I made a point of masturbation and took some time to watch porn on theupperfloor.com. I had my first orgasm, via my Siri buzzing my clit, while I watched Cherry Torn beg for orgasm. Whew. I think a part of me was glad it was her and not me. But another part reminisced about being in that situation myself and that part was triggered, so I came.

It was a lackluster orgasm. The type I generally have when I masturbate lately. It’s part of why I don’t masturbate more. It just can’t compare to an orgasm with MasterDoc.

I continued masturbating, and continued to watch the porn. A short time passed before I was able to come again. But this time – this time – I thought of MasterDoc telling me to come. Holy fuck I came hard! I squirted almost immediately (and the throe saved my couch which is why I set up before masturbation!) And I kept coming as I imagined him continuing to tell me to come. It was hot.

I’m thinking that instead of porn, I should re-read this blog when I masturbate. If I can’t be with MasterDoc, I can fully imagine I am with him, and get myself off. (Hell, you all read this blog and get yourselves off. Why shouldn’t I?)

Brat

Published on November 25, 2010 in anxiety, bdsm, blow jobs, caning, D/s, dom, edge play, embarrassment, emotions, gags, horny, humiliation play, kink, masochism, masturbation, musings, non-monogamy, orgasm denial, orgasm on command, piss play, sadism, sex, shio, squirting, submissive and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

While emotional outbursts, for me, are often caused by depression or anxiety issues, sometimes I’m just being a spoiled brat. Last Saturday I got cranky and pouty because the evening I thought I was to have alone with MasterDoc got changed around when DeeDee didn’t leave for her Thanksgiving trip for an extra day. So of course since she’s away this week, MasterDoc opted to spend time alone with her that night.

I think the pouting worked in some way for me growing up, otherwise why do I default to it so often? It’s immature and pretty counterproductive. (Especially with MasterDoc, he likes things to be calm and me having a childish fit doesn’t help that.) He spoke with me that day and while I cried over some things that bother me, I ultimately left his place feeling happy. I had plans to see him for definite on Sunday afternoon, and Monday evening AND Tuesday evening. He was right when he pointed out, “What’s one evening’s delay?” Nothing really.

When I saw him Sunday I got a lecture about my behavior and while I agree that I was certainly being a brat, I don’t think all my displeasure was unfounded. But I’ll leave those details between myself and my Dom. He tossed out the theory that since I was an only child (for nearly 11 years), and developed that sense of entitlement many only children develop, that having it taken away so abruptly (at the dawn of puberty no less) has left me feeling the need to count every minute, every task I do, etc. and demand as much time and as much recognition for my work as possible. It’s pretty obnoxious when I think about it. But there was always this, “Hey that’s not fair!” thing going on with my brother and me. Becoming a sister was a far rougher transition than I had thought it would be. But what did I know at 10 years old? I resented my poor brother for many years, and only as we’ve both become adults have I taken the time to apologize.

I really can be a dysfunctional shit sometimes. I’m lucky my friends love me despite my flaws.

So it’s time for me to refocus on my attitude and my service. This is something I’ve decided in light of my recent behavior. I will try to not mentally keep tabs on all tasks I do versus what DeeDee does. I will try to be more gracious when plans change. I will try to be a better submissive.

After our discussion, there was much pleasurable cock sucking and choking. I enthusiastically blew him for as long as possible. When we lay close to each other, he made me come on command a few times. When he brought up the idea of piss play, he really hit the nail on the head when he pressed me to admit I want him to piss on me. I couldn’t deny it, although I really wanted to. The humiliation that came with it was hot, however.

He didn’t piss on me that day, but I did ride his cock for a good long time. It was quite a full-body exercise! It seemed like he drew out the teasing phase before each orgasm, and I just loved it. While I am desperate for release, I’m also enjoying how it feels to be brought to the edge of orgasm. Stimulation feels good!

Monday and Tuesday evenings were spent with MasterDoc as well. There was some really hot sex Monday night and MasterDoc talked me through being able to handle a ball gag without gagging. The trick is to breathe slowly through the nose. If you breathe too quickly it narrows the nasal passages and you get less air. I also found that having my head tilting down or to the side helped too – the saliva didn’t pool at the back of my throat so much as dribble out, so I didn’t feel like I was drowning in spit. The gag is pretty loose and at one point while tantalizing me, MasterDoc pulled on it. It fit snugly in between my lips and the very act of him doing that made me so hot as my head was pulled back. (I’m twitching right now in remembrance.) There was more marvelous fucking – this time with him on top.

I am a damn lucky bitch.

Tuesday was quieter, but he made me come like crazy after I warmed myself up with masturbation. I think there was also quite a bit of caning. After two consecutive days of great sex, I was feeling pretty content and doing less on Tuesday wasn’t a big deal.

I’m sure I’m leaving stuff out or have changed the evenings when a particular activity occured. This is what comes of not having as much time to write lately. I get to see MasterDoc tomorrow and after just a day away from him I’m ready for nooky again.

Endlessly Horny Slut

Published on November 17, 2010 in anal, analingus, bdsm, D/s, edge play, embarrassment, happy, horny, humiliation play, kink, libido, masturbation, orgasm denial, orgasm on command, piss play, porn, prostate massage, sadism, sex, sex toys, shio, slut, squirting, submissive, trust, Uncategorized and wax play. 0 Comments

I often think that time spent alone with MasterDoc in sexual situations can’t get any better. And then they do.

Early in the evening he was talking about how he canceled an “orgasm on command” demonstration he was planning at a party we’re going to Friday. I spoke up, saying that I really think it wouldn’t be a problem him making me come with just a touch and a word – even in front of an audience. He turned towards me on the sofa and said, “Oh really?” His hand caressed my face and he twined his fingers in my hair. “So you think you could come just from my command?” I was twitching a little and breathing heavy by this time and I answered, “Yes, Sir.”

“Then you can come.” The full-body cascade came over me and my left hand shot out and impotently grabbed at his nearest thigh. I was still dressed in my work clothes, and we hadn’t any foreplay whatsoever. Even as he gave me the command a small part of me doubted I could come, but I am so conditioned now that not coming wasn’t an option. Thankfully I didn’t squirt in my work pants (although many of you pervs out there would have loved reading about that!).

A phone call came in for him immediately after, and I caught my breath, stunned, while he spoke on the phone.

Later, after we had both had dinner, bathed and gotten ready for sex, I put on a video from theupperfloor.com. (Thanks again to the person who shared their password with me! Hawt stuff!) He had me plug in the HDMI cable so we could see the porn on the big screen tv. Just watching the goings on of training the house slaves got me so hot. We both loved a scene where Cherry Torn had a knife handle (dinner knife) slid up her ass, and then the magic wand was vibrated against the part sticking out. I thought to myself that it would be super hot for me to disappear to the kitchen and return with a table knife, but something in me prevented me from just doing that. I really need to be more proactive.

He had told me minutes before to get an ass toy that he could use to warm up my ass. Earlier I had pointed out it was a long time since we had anal sex, and he took that under consideration. I returned with an ass toy – silicone, sorta rippled, with a handle to press against the perineum.

With lube and toy in hand he had me get on hands and knees. I leaned against the sofa arm. He worked the toy into my ass and I was moaning before much really started. The idea of him violating my ass was just too, too hot. I wasn’t quite sure what was going on at various times, but fuck, it felt good. He teased me and my whole body tingled with excitement. Satisfied that he had heated me up, we adjourned to the bedroom with the porn.

I’ve been feeling extremely horny and slutty in recent days. I’m sure many of you are saying in disbelief, “Only in recent days?!” Since the feeling of shift I wrote about last week, I’ve felt like some blocks about doing things MasterDoc wants me to do are starting to disappear. (Not all of them sadly, but a few key ones.) On some levels, I live for pleasing him. I’m starting to fantasize about him doing things I formerly thought of as hard limits.

In the bedroom, he told me to get a toy that’s larger than the first one for preparing my ass for fucking. I used a slender, red-sparkle silicone dildo to work my ass and soon I was fucking myself with it like a bitch in heat. He really enjoyed watching this and let me come after a while.

He was ready to fuck my ass himself, and we tried to figure out the best position. Unfortunately this hesitation led to difficulties getting it in (a cock needs to be super hard for anal) so we took a break. (Note to gentlemen of a certain age: As this entry will demonstrate, you can still satisfy and drive a woman wild even if your cock isn’t cooperating. Seriously, as much as I love cock it is not the only thing that will get me off/make me happy.)

He made me come a ton of times via command and molesting my body. He decided that it would help him get hard for me to lick his ass. Normally I’d have been hesitant to get there, but that block I mentioned that seems to have moved? I didn’t really have a problem getting my tongue into his asshole as best I could. I really tried very hard to make him feel good. I’m enjoying more and more feeling like he’s in control and that makes it easier to do things I don’t like to do. By verbal command, he made me come TWICE while I licked his ass. As I started to come the first time I thought to myself, “Damn you!” because of the embarrassment of orgasming while my tongue was on his asshole.

At this point, is there anything this man can’t do to make me come?

During one of our interludes (while I tried to recover from so many orgasms), he declared that everything points to enforced exercise. Fuuuuuck! He’s decided that if I do squats I’m allowed to come when I can. He emphasized that the point wasn’t doing squats until I’m sore and exhausted, just a few until I can manage to come knowing he’s given me permission to come. I cringe at the very idea of coming from exercise. But if anyone can make me do it, he can. We shall see.

We fooled around for two hours or so, and a couple of times he kept making me come long past the point where I thought I could. In my exhaustion, I nearly begged him to stop. Nearly. I’m digging this forced orgasms thing though.

His cock cooperated towards the end of the evening, and he fucked me up the ass. I didn’t hear him give me permission to come so I rode the edge the entire time. It felt pretty damn amazing. (Note to Doms: Please give commands to come loudly and clearly, because if the sub has to ask, “What did you say, Sir?” it decreases the arousal just enough to limit the ensuing orgasm.)

More porn was watched. I fantasized about him pissing in my mouth as he went off to use the bathroom. I started masturbating before he came back. Since it seemed pretty clear we were “done” as far as getting me off, I considered my clit tickling to be masturbation and came at will. He joined me again on the bed, and a few moments later told me to come after I had already started, and I just kept coming and coming. I had squirted even before he gave me the command to come. It’s amazing how fast I can rub my clit when I’m aroused.

He wanted a prostate massage, so I worked his ass over for a while. I was really getting into it. We heard DeeDee come in during this, and MasterDoc decided to delay his orgasm. We said hello to DeeDee, heard about her date, and I voiced a need for cuddles and aftercare.

We cuddled. And just being close to him turns me on so very much. It gives me a helpless feeling, the way I get wildly aroused around him. Soon I was licking his “spot” and realizing that indeed, “spot worship” has become a fetish for me. Yes, I will admit, the middle of his hairy chest turns me on. I talked about how I would love for him to come in my mouth and then I’d play with rubbing his come all over my chest. The fantasy was so strong! It wasn’t in the cards though.

He still wanted to come so he had me help by giving him an ass massage as he jerked off. I tried my best to tune in and notice his reactions. To press firmly against his asshole and perineum in a way that would feel good. My fingers made him twitch for a while after he had shot his load. Even though I was tired by this point, my submissive nature helped me focus and enjoy making him come. Even though there were so many delicious orgasms last night, I wanted to be his endlessly horny slut. I’d certainly stop playing when he asked me to, but I aimed to be eager and ready at all times. Accomplishing this wasn’t too hard.

Is it any wonder I hesitate to try to fuck another guy? Without MasterDoc taking control how can another guy fucking me be anywhere near as hot as when I fuck MasterDoc? But if he told me to fuck a roomful of strangers it would be the hottest thing ever, and I would do it under his watchful eye. I am his slut. There is no denying that.

Of Threesomes, Masturbation and Friends with Benefits

Published on November 15, 2010 in anxiety, bdsm, bisexuality, D/s, dating, DeeDee, libido, masturbation, musings, non-monogamy, poly, saajan, sex, sexuality, slut, submissive, threesome and Uncategorized. 1 Comment

As I dried off from my shower this evening, I could hear the rhythmic sounds of DeeDee getting a spanking from MasterDoc in the playroom. As you would expect in a poly household, there are times when she and MasterDoc have time alone, times when I have time alone with him, and time that we spend together (or completely on our own). Time spent alone with MasterDoc in the playroom means cuddles at minimum (and some spot worship (see para. 5 of that post), but usually orgasms, or a beating, or a good fucking or any combination thereof with things like nipple clamps, hot wax, needles, and the like thrown in sometimes for variety.

MasterDoc also uses those moments of post-orgasmic glow to address any concerns he has about your behavior as a sub. My latest lecture was how I need to be agreeable to threesomes with him and DeeDee (or any other woman for that matter) – not doing so is not an option. And I’ve been trying to sort out why over time I’ve gotten to feel uncomfortable with threesomes with MasterDoc and DeeDee. When DeeDee was new I was more able to play my part and not have any hang ups. But since becoming good friends, and her living at MasterDoc’s, I’ve come to feel awkward. Moody. Odd. I think it’s because DeeDee is, in my mind, a friend of mine and not a lover. I love her as one loves someone dear to you, but I feel strange getting into sexual situation with her there. I dunno. I also find that my insecurities are so great that if he’s paying attention to her first, I worry that I’m going to be left out completely. I tell you, threesomes are not all they’re cracked up to be. They can be hot, but sometimes one of you gets stuck diddling yourself in the corner while the real action goes on between the other two. I realize that for many that’s hot in and of itself, but I seldom diddle myself even when I’m alone these days. (That’s a contemplation for another paragraph.)

I don’t know that I have the answer, but apparently I have to find it. I do understand that sometimes a perk of being a polyamorous Dom should be getting pleasured by more than one of your subs at a time. When we’re both busy with him I suppose it’s not a bad thing as I enjoy making him feel good. Do any sub-types reading this have suggestions on getting into sexual situations (that you’d rather not get into) because your dominant orders you to? And do any of you have an idea on how to play with your dominant’s ass while he fucks someone else? The butt clenching that comes with fucking makes it pretty friggin impossible to get my fingers in there.

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Masturbation is something I did at an early age (I had my first orgasm before leaving elementary school) and did often when I was in high school. In the college dorm I got fewer opportunities, and once I was working full time I found I just didn’t have the energy to masturbate as often. With regular sex in my life, I’ve had even less interest in masturbation. A few weeks ago MasterDoc ordered me to masturbate at least once a week (preferably twice) and report back to him on it. The first two weeks I managed to remember and report in on the one time I did it each week. Last week I totally forgot. I often intend to masturbate as I’m horny a lot, but I put it off so I can do things like blog, watch a dvd, play a game on my phone. By the time I put all that away and get to bed I’m too drowsy to rub one out.

I find that I’m generally horny at the most inopportune times – like at work. Or when I have stuff to get gone at my place or MasterDoc’s. I’m already dedicated to carving out time for exercise again, so finding time for one more thing seems like too much. I don’t think I could ever have imagined that I could think of masturbation as too much work. I find that getting worked up is difficult by myself these days (not always, but often enough). Plus with the mind blowing orgasms I have with MasterDoc, why wouldn’t I prefer that? And if it seems like sex isn’t in the cards that night I think I subconsciously shut my horniness down.

Also let’s face it, sex by myself isn’t as interesting as with a partner.

I’ve kept my feelers out for more lovers to spend time with, but I spend a lot of time at MasterDoc’s and prefer it that way. I’m happy to be seeing Blondie, and for a while I was seeking a friend with benefits on a dating site but I got fed up with constant emails from guys I was totally uninterested in. Today I chatted up my old friend Saajan online. If you ever read my first blog he featured in it often. While I was in graduate school he and I were pretty regular friends with benefits. We fucked a few times after I moved in with Davey, and he came to my birthday gang bang a few years ago, but we’ve mainly lost touch. Since he is my idea of the ideal friend with benefits I decided to say hello. Why is he ideal? Well he’s extremely smart, funny, nice and someone I enjoy spending even non-sexual time with – but there has never been even the whiff of romance between us. He can fuck like a jack-hammer and is aggressive in bed. He’s the first man who made me squirt.

I don’t have a date set for a fuck with him but he was up for it. He just may be the extra cock I’m searching for right now. The orgasms won’t have the blinding quality I get with MasterDoc – orgasms with MD are kinda like an old television losing reception – my brain goes totally fuzzy and I lose all ability… to do anything really, other than come that is. I’ve gotten spoiled.

Piss and Come

Published on November 3, 2010 in anal, bdsm, cunt, D/s, embarrassment, humiliation play, kink, masturbation, orgasm on command, piss play, prostate massage, sadism, sex toys, shio, squirting, submissive and Uncategorized. 3 Comments

I have a new toy to review! Lelo, maker of most of my favorite toys, sent me a Soraya. It’s part of their new Insignia line. It looks like the buttons are less likely to get pushed during critical moments, which has always been my only real complaint about their toys. A formal review will come once I’ve used it more. But the other night I settled down in the playroom at MasterDoc’s with my soraya. I used the vibe on my clit, warmed myself up, applied some lube and used the toy in all sorts of ways. I pressed the nub against my clit while the toy buzzed away inside too. MasterDoc joined me and helped spur me on by talking to me and touching me. I made myself come for a long while, and had to let the toy out to let the squirt out.

I was settling in to help MasterDoc come, when I got a call from my friend Divasub. She was heading over (as I had invited her to do) after coming back from a weekend away. MasterDoc decided that he might as well come out and be social too, and in typical “MasterDoc’s Halfway Home for Wayward Women” fashion, he came out naked. Well she’d seen him naked before. Of course the hard on was perhaps a bit much, but Divasub can take it in stride. The three of us chatted on the sofa. DeeDee wasn’t feeling well so she had gone to bed. During our talk, MasterDoc reached over to stroke my face, grab my hair and gave me the command to come. Fuck. I did come. It was embarrassing despite the fact that I know Divasub is a big pervert too. This was followed by both of them coming up with devious things that could be done to me. (Any suggestions on how I can get back at Divasub for this, let me know. It wasn’t just things I found hot but things I’d hate too – like getting peed on by a bunch of guys after a gang bang. Eww. Some friend!)

Divasub headed home after a bit and MasterDoc was inspired by the conversation to piss on me. He took me into the bathroom and ordered me into the tub. He did the face stroking/hair pulling thing that helps get me in the mood so quickly and told me I could come when I felt his piss hit me. Fuck. I came again, feeling humiliated as his piss ran down my body. I ran out of orgasmic steam before he had finished though, since my orgasm was completely spurred on by thoughts rather than physical stimulation. I got lost in the humiliation sensation which can be hot in and of itself. To drive home his Dominance or play with more humiliation (I’m assuming) he rubbed wet cock on me right after he finished. I showered off.

After my shower I finally got to help him come. I played with his ass while he jerked off – the usual. I felt a chunk of poo in there, and I was glad he agreed to using a toy next. (Poo happens to everyone from time to time.) I slid the Lelo Liv in his lubed up ass and pressed it against his prostate. (They’ve created a new one, the Billy, for ass play – it has a ridge to keep the toy from slipping in which the Liv doesn’t.) As I mentioned before, the vibrator controls got hit and the vibration pattern changed mid-wank. But he decided he likes the different patterns. (I never bother with the patterns. A nice, steady, strong vibration does it for me.)

I had mentioned earlier that I wish he’d come in my mouth more often. He said he’d take it under advisement. When he was ready to come he had me jump around to his front to have him come on my face. (I opened my mouth eagerly but he told me, “No, not in your mouth. On your face.”) He told me to come at the same time, and for the third time that night I came without physical genital stimulation. Some of his come ended up on the throe but some was clinging to my chin. He said I looked cute like that and told me I could clean it off or leave it on as I wished. I used a tissue to clean it off and then cleaned up the toys.

Fucking Back to Health

Published on November 2, 2010 in anxiety, bdsm, caning, cunt, D/s, DeeDee, emotions, kink, masochism, masturbation, nipple clamps, orgasm on command, porn, sadism, sex, shio, spanking, squirting, submissive and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

The weekend was pretty mellow since I wasn’t feeling well. Before I came down with something, I was feeling needy Friday night. DeeDee had just come back from a few days away, so of course intellectually I realized she should get more of MasterDoc’s attention. But probably because I was starting to feel ill, I became easily cranky when I thought I was being left out. Internet porn was put up on the big, flat screen tv and MasterDoc stroked his cock and DeeDee’s pussy. I took up rubbing my own, but my discontent at what I perceived as being ignored prevented me from getting into it. Ironic thing is that as soon as I stopped, MasterDoc asked why because he had been watching me play with myself. So the feeling of being left out or disconnected to what was going on was merely my perception. But the perception is enough to make me feel like it’s real.

I had a bit of a meltdown and MasterDoc hurried me off into the playroom. He gave me a quick beating, followed by a really hard finger fucking. He made me come over and over, and I was left exhausted. He’s figured out that my anxieties over being left out or ignored can easily be fixed by making me come. I don’t need a ton of attention, once I’ve come I’m much more mellow and able to enjoy watching. He invited me to join him and DeeDee, but I was feeling like I wanted to be alone rather than part of a threesome. I went to bed early that night and woke up sick early the next morning. You know I’m sick when I don’t have the energy to even consider fucking.

The following day I had hit that point where I’m still sick, but I have just enough energy to be horny. I didn’t have energy to be much of an active participant, but MasterDoc handled that by putting clover clamps on my nipples. It hurt like crazy, but I am getting used to them. I can wear them a while without freaking out over the pain. He told me to speak up when the pain got too much. He then proceeded to fuck me silly from on top. I’d notice the pain in my clamped nipples now and then but then I’d get lost in the pleasure of being fucked and the pain would register as pleasure for a while. This reminds me of a bdsmer I dated briefly years ago. He played with my nipples on a deserted Manhattan street – twisting them for the longest time. I remember the sensation would hurt, then go slightly numb and then turn me on totally. This wasn’t just one cycle, but over and over the cycle would go while he continued twisting.

After fucking and making me come over and over, MasterDoc took the clamps off quickly to try to reduce the length of the worst pain. When you remove clover clamps they hurt even more than when you were wearing them. The blood rushes back into the compressed nipple and is agonizing. My nipples were tender for the rest of the day.

I was pretty worn out, but we still had bdsm porn playing on the laptop. I started masturbating and MasterDoc gave me the order to come, stroking his cock while watching me. I could feel liquid squirt out of my cunt and splash my hand. I left a wet spot on the throe.

He had mentioned recently that watching a woman lick/suck the pussy juice off her fingers is hot, so I made a display of licking my soaking wet fingers clean. He suggested I do that next time we do a show.

He asked if I was ready to be fucked again and despite some fatigue I was happy to get more. He fucked me from behind, hard and for what seemed like a long time. He had me tilt the laptop so he could watch the porn. Think about it guys – kinky porn right next to the shuddering form of the woman you’re fucking, who is moaning in delight and eager to come. He made me come for a long time again. I think I squirted some more. I moaned incessantly as my face pressed into the mat. I was a little sweaty and a lot tired after, but oh so happy.

I Like It Rough

Published on October 25, 2010 in bdsm, caning, D/s, horny, kink, masochism, masturbation, orgasm denial, orgasm on command, porn, sex toys, shio, spanking, squirting, submissive and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

After my vacation started off fairly “MasterDoc-free,” he made up for lost time this weekend. He stayed at my place (first time I’ve had someone sleep over in the new place) and we found that sharing my full-sized bed is tough, but we can manage it.

Friday I had a hard time getting into the sexual mood. When I haven’t seen much of him for a period of time, I feel like I need to reconnect first. Any attempts at sex on Friday fizzled. But by Saturday I was in a better mood. We watched a video from kink.com’s “The Upper Floor” (many thanks to the person who shared their password with me). It got me so hot and wet! But MasterDoc decided we should exercise and get errands done first. Phooey. So I not only did yoga (when I was already sore from the day before), we also walked to the thrift store and got him some “new” pants since his old ones are too big now (yay weight loss!). By the end of the walk I was in pain – my legs from working them too much, and my shoulders from working them (downward facing dog anyone?) but also carrying around a heavy purse when we went shopping. Many varieties of pain relievers were taken Saturday night to combat my extremely sore shoulders.

As part of our errands we went back to MasterDoc’s place. DeeDee was out, so we got in some play time (I have most of my toys at his place). He flogged, spanked, caned and paddled me roughly. This was perfect because I was thinking to myself as he set up, “I want him to hurt me. I really want him to be rough.” He pushed my limits of pain and left welts on my ass that I could feel a few minutes later. (Frustratingly, the beating left nothing but one small bruise.) Watching the porn earlier had put me in a very distinct mood for pain and roughness. I love when he grabs my hair, or puts his hand at my throat. I want to be slapped across the face. I was also thinking how I love it when it feels like he’s molesting me. I like the porn from The Upper Floor because much of it was the stuff of my fantasies. Being a slave/sub being manhandled and used as your “betters” see fit. If you haven’t been exposed to that site at all, the theme is that it takes place in a bdsm household where the slaves are trained and used. The women in it are younger and in much better shape than me, I couldn’t possibly hold some of the positions they managed to hold for extended periods of time. Sometimes there’s parties and the slaves are used sexually by a variety of dominants. Fucking hot.

He made me come, partly after the caning and partly during the caning. He’s good at making me come then inflicting pain so that the pain becomes part of the pleasure. Despite my sore body it felt so good to come hard again after a few days of abstaining. (Silly of me to hold back though, I really should have made a point of masturbating.)

We headed back to my place for dinner and I hoped that wasn’t all the sex we were having. I was so horny! After dinner, we checked out more porn on The Upper Floor. We ended up on my bed, both playing with ourselves while watching. I think it’s true that men are more visually-oriented than women. While I get hot watching porn, I crave physical contact. I craved him being rough with me. I didn’t just want to watch someone else get roughed up – I wanted it too. I stopped masturbating at one point because my desire was fizzling by the minute. I reached out to stroke his chest, hoping that initiating touch would lead to me being touched. We ended up talking a little and I raised the issue of my desires with him. He lent a hand making me come and slapping my thighs. He grabbed my throat and held me firmly, but not too tight.

Since there are times when I seem to want more sex than MasterDoc does, he’s decided that if I want more after he’s made me come I should let him know I’m going to go masturbate. This way he can gauge just how much coming I crave. I took him up on this and got hold of the Hitachi a few minutes later and put the porn back on. He joined me on the bed for more hair grabbing which helped me come super hard. I squirted all over my throe and just kept the Hitachi buzzing at my clit for the longest time.

That felt good. No, great.

Sunday, we watched more porn which of course led to more fooling around. He massaged my sore shoulders for me, but spanked my ass hard in between. I tried very hard not to cry out too loud, as my apartment is small and I’m sure sound must travel into the hallway a bit. (At least enough to hear as you walk by. That’s all I’ve noticed from other apartments in my building.) He’d grab my cunt and slap and rub it roughly. The shoulder massage turned into part of the bdsm by how much it hurt when he massaged them deeply.

He had me flip over, and asked me what insertables I have around. I think I only have one of my favorite silicone dildoes at my place and I got that out. I also grabbed lube.

He realized that the dildo could be used to beat me, and he went at my clit, thighs and nipples with it. He toyed around with it at the entrance to my cunt, and then slowly slid it in. As he fucked me with it, I so wanted to come! He’d intersperse hurting me with fucking me with the dildo. He used the Hitachi on me only momentarily, then he went back to the dildo. He told me to come and jesus, I not only came over and over again, I squirted the most I’ve squirted in a while. The throe was soaked! I could feel the liquid run beneath my thighs. I lay there spent afterward.

He gave me a new assignment. I am to masturbate at least once, preferably twice, a week and report to him on it. I should send him an email with when I did it, what I was thinking about (or watching) while I did it, and what did I use (my hands, vibrator, etc.).

Forced Orgasms

Published on October 17, 2010 in bdsm, cunt, D/s, edge play, masturbation, orgasm on command, trust and Uncategorized. 1 Comment

Before my work day from hell yesterday, MasterDoc and I had an amazing time Friday afternoon. With months of exercise behind him now, MasterDoc’s musculature becoming more apparent – his arms more defined, his thighs too. While I don’t generally go for muscular types, I do find the transformation in his body to be very sexy. I like feeling the muscles in his arms, particularly when he’s hovering over me during sex.

When I mentioned this new turn-on to him, he said, “You like it because it means I can toss you around more.” I grew shy and laughed. He was dead on. Not only is my Dom mentally and emotionally strong, he’s becoming physically strong as well. His sexiness has entered a new dimension.

That afternoon, he made me come – repeatedly. There was the mental connection, coupled with the physical contact and him simply saying the word, “Come.” I thought to myself that he must have been trying to make me come til I pass out. He continued the stimulation fingering my pussy. I thought passing out could very well happen because mid-orgasm my breath was held. My body would pause a second to gasp when I really needed air, but his ministrations kept me coming long past what I thought I could handle. I couldn’t stop coming. My tired body would try to wind down but he kept on touching me and I kept on coming.

He did that a few times. One time he grabbed hair, slid his hand to my throat and made me come. He gripped my throat firmly, but not enough to cut off blood or air. It turned me on and scared me at same time. I’m sure he could have made me pass out if he wanted to but he knows my current limits. Part of me thrills to that idea now – the idea of him making me pass out somehow - it used to terrify me. But I know him for much longer now and have developed a deep trust. (Plus his being a physician who could take care of me if something went wrong is a huge factor.)

I love that I’ve found someone who I can express my darkest fantasies to; someone who may call me a “sick girl” but who means it with the utmost affection. I pointed out that he’s the sick boy who likes to dish it out. He agreed.

I lost track of how many times he made me come that afternoon. Each time I was surprised at my luck that I was getting more orgasms wrung out of me. I was amazed at how long he would go on stimulating me and making me come. With his newly muscled arms he finger fucked me good and hard – and for longer than he used to.

He was going to give me sybian ride too. (!) I marveled at my good fortune. I really am lucky. But instead of the ride he made me come manually all over again. No complaints here!

Saturday Interlude

Published on September 27, 2010 in bdsm, bisexuality, blow jobs, D/s, dom, humiliation play, kink, libido, masochism, masturbation, orgasm on command, piss play, sadism, sex, sex toys, submissive and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

I was just bemoaning how behind I am in blogging. MasterDoc laughed, saying, “Oh poor you, you can’t keep up blogging all the sex you have!” Yes, I’m fortunate to have lots of interesting sex. But sitting down to blog can require discipline I don’t always feel. I love writing and I love chronicling my adventures, but it is work.

Saturday morning, after googling Blondie (That’s not her porn name, by the way. I’m not sure she wants it mentioned here so I’m erring on the side of caution.) and handling other internet stuff, MasterDoc suggested sex. Hells yeah! We both bathed and got set up in the play room.

Over the past week or two I’m finally opening up to myself that I’m even pervier than I like to admit. I’m starting to admit I like humiliation play – a lot. I like him pissing on me as a humiliation thing. I love when he makes me feel totally in his control and uses me as he likes. I love being his dirty slut AND being made to feel like it.

I spoke up about craving roughness before we started. The action started with me giving him a blowjob. He choked me with his cock more than usual. Fuck, I found it so hot for him to choke me, my throat working to push his cock out as his hands held my head down. The struggle to open my throat. The saliva flowing. The gasp when I pull free and the enthusiasm with which I go right back to sucking his cock.

Blowing him is foreplay for me as well as him. Direct physical stimulation is sometimes needed to get me wet, but sucking cock is usually plenty to get me turned on. (Any other ladies find that being wet doesn’t always correlate to arousal? Near my period I’m wet all the time even without arousal, but I can be getting sexual with someone, really into it, and not that wet. Lube is invaluable.) When he gave me a rest, he made me come by command again with some slapping and getting me to focus my mind. I had been craving face slapping. My jaw felt a little sore afterward, but not for long.

He had me get on top and ride him. I loved sliding his cock into me but after holding myself up during orgasm the night before my legs were too tired out to do the thrusting. I did my best but I had to stop.

He took a moment to figure out a way to have me be reasonably comfortable, yet use me at the same time. He had me lay with my head over the end of bed. He fucked my throat and I loved it. The only bad thing was when his balls would fall over my nostrils. (I do need some air.) My hands were free so I just moved them out of the way. While fucking my mouth he slapped my pussy and made me come. Despite my little aside earlier in this post, I had no trouble getting wet during this particular interlude. I was very wet. Juicy.

I still wanted more. My already high sex drive has gotten higher lately. MasterDoc was done and ready to move on to other things, but I asked if I could masturbate. He granted permission and I quickly plugged in the Hitachi and masturbated while having fantasies about my date from the night before. The queer part of my heart is soaring to be seeing a woman for a change. A few more orgasms later I finally felt sated.