Archive for the 'foursome' Category

Awesome, Awesome Night

Published on May 4, 2011 in bdsm, bisexuality, blow jobs, bondage, couple, cunt, D/s, dom, embarrassment, exhibitionism, flogging, forced orgasm, foursome, horny, humiliation play, kink, lesbian, masochism, masturbation, non-monogamy, orgasm on command, restraints, sex, sex parties, sex toys, shio, slut, spanking, squirting, submissive, swinging and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

On Monday night we went to the swing club since I had off the next day. On the way there, MasterDoc pulled the car over by a porn store, the type with the porn booths that MasterDoc likes taking ladies to. I was feeling easily embarrassed somehow and hoped that perhaps this wasn’t happening. But he dragged me in, I felt super shy as we nodded hello to the guy working behind the counter. We got to the booths and I figured I was in the clear when there were no people there, but he walked me back out into the store where the employees were. He stood me in front of him, ostensibly looking at a display of porn box covers and started caressing my shoulders and grabbing hold of my hair. Fuck. He knows me. He knows the slight humiliation of getting turned on in public, and how he can do that to me effortlessly, would turn me on. My body twitched a bit, giving away my increasingly aroused state.

Thankfully, we were only there a short while. In the car as we continued to the club he said, “I should have a least let the guy who works there have a grope.” I’m sure I blushed at this. At the club, we met one of our usual pals there and had a nice chit chat. Veronica is the bartender but she also amuses the single guys. After the chat, MasterDoc went to use the restroom, and I felt shy while waiting alone. If guy comes over to me, I’m never sure if flirting is okay as MasterDoc decides who I play with. I probably seem like an aloof bitch sometimes. I assure you, it’s shyness rather than bitchiness. It also stems from knowing that giving some guys the least bit of polite attention will have them pursuing you all night long.

I watched the porn on the big screen. “Hey, is that Paris Hilton?” I thought. I usually disdain Ms. Hilton, but I gained a smidgen of respect (!) as I watched her blow her boyfriend. The girl’s got skillz.

I ask for a cuddle when MasterDoc gets back and he agreed we could use a cuddle. We hadn’t seen each other in a couple of days and therefore hadn’t cuddled. The cuddle turned into a little making out and him caressing my body. It amazes me still how, with him, simply having my breasts stroked (the top part mind you, not the nipples) I can get turned on tremendously. You know, being his trained monkey who gets turned on and comes at his command isn’t such a bad thing.

The room with the king bed was busy, so we headed to the chilly back room. I was very horny already and soon didn’t notice the cool air. We cuddled, caressed each other and kissed. I love feeling his body under my hand. He had me go down on him and I enjoyed every second. He managed to truly fuck my throat at one point. It was pretty awesome. He thrust in, I could feel the ridge of his cock head press pass some spot in my throat and I have trained my gag reflex pretty well by now – I didn’t start gagging until a few deep thrusts had been achieved. A guy came in to watch sometime during this. MasterDoc had me get on hands and knees so my ass was facing the room. He showed me off, using a flashlight to highlight my pussy. I felt thrilled and embarrassed (and thrilled to be embarrassed) by the attention. He used clothespins on my labia, but I was so engrossed in being a slut on display that I didn’t pay much attention to them. He inserted the anal beads. I’ve found though that I can’t often tell exactly which toy is up my ass. I don’t seem to have the right amount of sensation for details there, but I knew I was being filled with something, He flogged me a bit, telling the guy how much I love being shown off. He had the guy hold my butt cheek out of the way one time and I could never be sure exactly whose hands were touching my cunt (I think it was always him other than the butt cheek thing). He made me come for an extended period of time and I was exhausted. Or so I thought.

We dressed and MasterDoc noticed a couple with a hot woman. He started chatting up the couple, and I joined him in being friendly. I didn’t have a problem with the guy as sometimes happens, and I was doing my best to help MasterDoc get in the hot woman’s skirt. We ended up showing them our bag of tricks. They were from out of town and friendly in that southern way. I really think I’d have better conversational skills had I been raised in the south. The woman was shy and quiet, but her man was very talkative. They seemed quite nice. MasterDoc made me come via magic wand and fingering when it came out that the guy in the couple had never seen a woman squirt. Of course I did. He thought it was awesome.

We rested on the bed, chatting with the couple as she stood against the wall and her guy sat on an ottoman. MasterDoc was doing his best to be charming and get the lady’s attention. The guy was fascinated by our toy bag and I ended up in the behind-the-back restraints. After he got them on, he told me to kneel in them, and I’m sure my struggle to get myself upright was fun to watch. He had me lean forward so that I was resting on my head and shoulders. I told him that was very uncomfortable (as ending up with a neckache is not a desirable outcome) and he told me I just had to do it for a little while. I think I was the definition of helpless with my ass in the air and hands behind my back. He let me sit, and I stayed there for a while sitting next to him with my arms behind my back. MasterDoc spread my legs and played with my cunt. He made me come again through slapping my cunt – I think he really enjoyed showing off that he could do that. The sheets were pretty damn wet by now.

I’m slowly starting to realize that a woman like me can be intimidating for a man. I don’t think of myself as intimidating, but being so in control of my sexuality (and choosing to hand that control over to MasterDoc) and so comfortable with having sex in front of people does intimidate guys. I tell you, if a slutty woman is interested in playing with you, don’t be intimidated – go for it! We love sex. Even if it’s not the most amazing sex we ever had, odds are if we’re mutually interested in fucking you we will enjoy it too. I don’t think loving sex is at all a bad thing. Religion doesn’t know what it’s talking about.

I stripped the wet sheets from the bed and we went to the main room. It seemed like the woman in the couple wasn’t too interested, but soon the guy from the couple came over and asked if I wanted to make his wife come. I’m certainly game to make an attractive woman come, and I’m sure our men would enjoy watching. Also, perhaps if this woman was warmed up MasterDoc might get somewhere with her. MasterDoc gave his assent (I’m his slut, he decides) and we adjourned to the king room again. We had to find someone to put new sheets on. There was initial awkwardness as her shyness continued and MasterDoc talked about how I’m not the aggressive type – the problem was she’s not either. She got undressed to try to move things along and I felt freer to start playing with her. Her body was perfectly toned, her augmented breasts standing up perkily. Her husband suggested I use a toy and I used my siri on her clit then worked my fingers inside. I made her come pretty damn quickly and it was fun to watch, she just about did a crab walk backwards on the bed because of the intensity of the stimulation. I totally understand why MasterDoc sometimes chuckles when I’m coming like crazy.

I took my bra off and even though this woman was pretty much our society’s ideal (except she wasn’t young) she sounded envious when she commented on how big my breasts are and how they’re real. It’s terrible how nearly all women seem to have body issues these days. She made me come next, using just her hands and MasterDoc lent a hand. I squirted again.

I felt pretty damn tired, but MasterDoc wanted to fuck and I did want his cock. I sucked him til he was hard. He played with my pussy which of course was sopping wet. He fucked me from behind while at least one guy watched and he pushed me over the edge (orgasm-wise) with relative ease. (Remember, I don’t just get to come, I need to hold back as long as I can but if he drives me crazy he won’t get mad if I come before he’s said the word.) I was totally lost in lala land during orgasm after orgasm. I can only imagine what my face looked like. I think sometime I need someone to film me coming so I can see it.

It was an awesome fuck. He kept going and going, and guess what? I squirted again. A whole lot. It was just as well I hadn’t taken the last sheet off but instead suggested to MasterDoc that we use the same room because I had already besmirched the sheet.

I was so tired (having worked all day, exercised in the evening and then came, and came and came) that I just lay there after. He had me spread my legs to show guy my pussy to the guy there while I rested. He gave guy the flashlight to get a better look.

MasterDoc nearly had to cart me home. I slept like a proverbial log that night.

As an aside, in the midst of our trying to flirt with the couple, a guy from Spain (he told us he was from Spain) appeared with two hot Mexican chicks. The guy was aggressive in trying to set something up with the couple. The women looked eager to play. I later caught sight of them making out with each other – I wanted to be in the middle of that! Sadly, this was not to be.

Brief Update

Published on March 6, 2011 in anxiety, bdsm, bondage, crazy, D/s, depression, emotions, flogging, foursome, kink, mental illness, non-monogamy, orgasm on command, sex, shio, spanking, squirting, stress and Uncategorized. 2 Comments

I’ve been struggling with depression this week, something that seems to happen all too often lately. This week the excuse was my turbulent hormones pre-period. Going on birth control a few months ago was supposed to help this, and it did, for a while. But I struggled a great deal this week. I’m not pleasant to be around when depressed, I see everything through a darkened eye and find negative things to dwell on. (I think my subconscious makes things up too.) Bless MasterDoc for handling me. Also, I tried hard to deal with things more calmly than I would in the past. I keep working on myself.

As a consequence, when I have had hot sex I haven’t felt like writing about it. Sorry to disappoint you all, but this will probably be just a short summary of the adventures I had this week.

Sunday and Monday nights I got to spend alone with MasterDoc. I was thrilled since recent weeks have yielded minimal time alone with him. The first night, I was struggling with insecurity as big as a football field. After sobbing that I was afraid that MasterDoc no longer had interest in sex with me – I’ll wait while you laugh at that – he fucked me three long times. And each time he pushed me over the edge of orgasm – and kept me going!

Monday night he noticed himself falling into the whole “let’s watch porn, masturbate then fuck” thing he does when he feels lazy. He decided to put more effort into that evening and soon I was laying on the bed blindfolded, with a bondage tape gag. He got good and rough with me. There was lots of biting, slapping, fingering. While fucking he made me feel like a piece of meat in that particular way that makes me love it. I loved the sensory deprivation of having most of my head wrapped up.

I went without sex for a few days. (When will I take the time to find a suitable friend with benefits?) On Friday afternoon, MasterDoc lined up this Dom and sub who we’ve played with before – for the life of me I can’t remember what I’ve called them here. We met them at a hotel and played together. With my depressed mood I had a hard time getting into things, but I did my best. Funny how even when I struggle with arousal I still end up coming and squirting a freakin’ river. Thank you, MasterDoc! After the couple left, we hung out for a little longer and he gave me a beating – something I’ve been in need of but I wasn’t quite in the headspace to enjoy. He then fucked me and I squirted yet again.

Hopefully my mood will continue to improve and I will have more adventures to share and will actually take the time to write detailed entries on them!

Sunday Swing

Published on February 20, 2011 in bbc, bisexuality, blow jobs, cunnilingus, foursome, lesbian, non-monogamy, pillow princess, sex, shio, slut, squirting, swinging and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

Sunday night I was slated to hang out with MasterDoc while DeeDee had a date over. I looked forward to a quiet night alone with him in the playroom, but he was searching craigslist for something interesting. We found a younger couple looking to swing – mid to late 20s – and fairly good looking from their pictures. She’s very chubby but I often go for chubby women who are chubby in all the right places. I love curves, breasts, hips, thick thighs. The couple was nice, but not close friend material. I doubt we had a lot in common beyond swinging, but they were nice to hang out with and fuck. She was a sexy, white bbw. He was a fit black guy with a bbc. When my profession got mentioned, the guy perked up. It’s amazing how often guys have librarian fantasies.

Even I, the woman who is notorious for not being able to get things started was trying to push things along. We showed them the couple of sex toys we brought in a little case and I brought my Lelo Siri over to show the woman how strong the vibration was. She liked it. We managed to get them into the bedroom and MasterDoc started off kissing me. He had me suck his cock hard and I somehow ended up using my Lelo Soraya on the woman. The guys remained half dressed while she and I started fooling around.

MasterDoc took over the toy, and the guy came over to eat me out. I’m always pleased when a guy goes for that first, often guys who will go down on me first are better lovers. He licked my pussy while I leaned over to suck her large nipples. She was soft and lovely to kiss and we made out often in the midst of things. Neither one of them turned out to be particularly knowledgeable about fingering, but in all fairness they are in their 20s still. They both did the basic in-out-in-out I remember from sexual experiences in my early 20s or so. If we see them again maybe I can offer a tutorial. They were both enthusiastic about oral so that helped. As often seems to happen, she went down on me but I didn’t end up going down on her. (This is how I get accused of being a pillow princess sometimes, I think.)

His cock was big and he’s a fit young man – so the fucking was good and energetic. I made out with the woman while MasterDoc fucked her and her boyfriend fucked me. This is the sort of decadence I love. I’m all for pleasure. No wonder I’ve turned away from religion. I don’t think pleasure is a sin.

I sucked his cock for a long time while she went down on me. MasterDoc was disappointed that the woman didn’t seem much into it. I know how that can really put a damper on things. The guy on the other hand was quite eager to fuck me and put his cock in my mouth. Since it was a Sunday night, and I had work the next day, the evening ended fairly early. But since they lived maybe 20 blocks from us it wasn’t a long drive home. I had been in the mood for having MasterDoc alone, but I was glad that I just went with his idea to swing. I had fun.

Thankfully, we had brought the throe as I squirted all over the damn thing. I think over time I squirt more and more often. Not all the time, but frequently now.

Kinky Foursome

Published on September 23, 2010 in bdsm, bisexuality, bondage, D/s, foursome, gags, horny, kink, masochism, masturbation, orgasm on command, restraints, sadism, sex, sex toys, submissive, swinging, Uncategorized and wax play. 2 Comments

It’s taken me a couple of days to sit down and write more than just notes about the kinky foursome we had on Tuesday. The featured guests were slave amber and her Master from this little nugget of a blog post.

Her Master arrived first, he and MasterDoc talked a bit about what they were planning to do (as they had done online earlier). With two diabolical minds at work I was nervous, but I needn’t be. MasterDoc would take care of me.

MasterDoc thought of the behind the back restraints I’m so hot for using, so I went to get them from the play room. However, this train of thought was distracted by amber calling up needing direction assistance. Later, when she had arrived, I had to remind MasterDoc that we were going to use them. Being bound and somewhat helpless turns me on tremendously. We don’t do enough bondage. My earliest bsdm fantasies consisted of being kidnapped, tied up, gagged and played with. Make me come when I’m helpless and I turn to mush.

MasterDoc made me come by touching me and commanding. Our guests were pretty impressed by how easily he could make me come. I have found, however, that if I’m not worked up mentally beforehand, while I still orgasm (uterus contracts and all) it’s not nearly as satisfying as an orgasm with more foreplay to it. Even if that foreplay is just mental.

Of course being a couple of days late writing this I’m bound to leave something out. Speaking of bound – amber’s Master likes to play with rope (one of MasterDoc’s few weaknesses). I was told to get on all fours and he bound my tits. Then he had me kneel up and he extended the tie into a crotch rope. Initially I wasn’t into it, but after I lay down on the mat in the living room and the dental gag was put in my mouth, and the Wartenburg wheel run over my body, I started to change my mind. The wheel tickles much of the time – I had to try to explain this with my mouth held wide open. With more pressure it “hurts better” as MasterDoc put it. Indeed. It felt good on my sensitive bound breasts.

After that, there was talk of hot wax. I was surprised that I was the intended victim, but of course amber was told to lay beside me (cheap shower curtains are great for easy clean up!) and both of us had hot wax poured over our fronts. I was yelping quite a bit, and wondered if I was a wimp. But thankfully MasterDoc suspected that their candle was much cooler – and so the two Doms switched candles. Totally different using their candle. No more yelps from me but plenty from amber. The two of us were waxed on front and back. We scraped off as much as possible before leaving the shower curtain, and towards the end MasterDoc realized that this textured rubber glove he has is just perfect for wiping the wax off (and providing some sensation play at the same time.)

The next scene required wrist and ankle cuffs. I was overjoyed to use mine. I bought them long before I met MasterDoc and we haven’t gotten to use them much. The other Master bound amber and I to each other. I’m taller so my arms were wrapped around her upper back. He also attached our ankles together. Next, we were wrapped in plastic cling wrap. I was concerned about this beforehand because I had a boyfriend wrap me once before and I panicked when I couldn’t breathe. This time, however, it was totally cool. They men ordered us to make out with each other while bound together. Being pressed up against a woman and kissing her with my Dom watching is pretty damn hot.

The day became physically wearing as the two Doms had loads of ideas of things to try with two subs/slaves present. amber’s Master brought a brand new double-ended dildo. I had used one before and found it lacking, but of course I could give it a try again. (I have yet to find a silicone double ended dildo – use condoms with the ones out there as they’re usually made of a porous material, not to mention they have nasty pthalates in them.) We were positioned on our hands and knees on the mat, our asses pointing at each other. I felt the dildo slide in and it wasn’t unpleasant, but it wasn’t thrilling either. MasterDoc gave me a vibe to use on my clit. amber’s Master ordered me to move on it, but it’s pretty hard to get any thrust from such a flexible dildo. MasterDoc stepped in and moved it back and forth so both of us were getting fucked alternately. This enabled me to come. And with the vibe on my clit I came pretty damn hard. I think having someone move the dildo is the secret.

I was exhausted. Holding yourself on hands and knees or kneeling for extended periods of time takes energy. I lay spent on the mat while MasterDoc started showing the Gigi to amber. I gushed about Lelo toys and explained how it’s stronger than battery-operated vibes because it’s a rechargeable. MasterDoc toyed with her clit while her Master kissed her. I joined in first by sucking on her nipple, and later by by wetting my finger and stroking her clit. I played with her clit while MasterDoc fucked her with the Gigi.

Our guests left after this, and it was a fun afternoon albeit a joking one. But hey, I like people with senses of humor. It just might have been more sexually stimulating with less joking. Oh well, there’s always next time.

MasterDoc and I had dinner and rested for a while. I still wanted his cock inside me though. (This was during the 4 days a month my birth control takes a rest, so I was feeling lots of menstrual symptoms such as rampant horniness.) My back ached and MasterDoc was kind enough to massage it for a bit. (Not only do I massage him, he will do the same for me. And as a doctor he puts his knowledge of anatomy to good use there as well.) For fucking, he put me over the Liberator axis which was just perfect because I could rest my full weight. It had the effect of making me feel a bit like an object, and lately I’ve been into that

My incredible horniness still wasn’t sated after our fuck. I figured MasterDoc would have no problem with me using one of my weekly masturbation sessions, and so I grabbed the Hitachi and went to town. MasterDoc came in to join me just in time to see me to come and lend a hand a little. I was happy after, and boy did I sleep well that night.

Kinky Foursome

Published on June 6, 2010 in bdsm, bisexuality, bondage, caning, cunnilingus, cunt, D/s, DeeDee, dom, fantasy, foursome, kink, non-monogamy, restraints, sex, sex toys, sexuality, shio, slut, spanking, squirting, swinging, sybian and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

So our new friend – I didn’t get into the blog thing much so I have no idea what alias she’d like – and I prefer giving people the choice of their blog name. So I think I’ll still refer to her as “new friend” until (if) I can suss out what she wants to be called here.

She wrote a sexy, smart, fun ad on craigslist looking for a couple to Dominate her. She sent MasterDoc a picture – and is really cute. And while I so often feed on other people’s insecurities, I didn’t get the feeling from her that she had any issue with what she was doing there with us – and it was easier for me to join in than it usually is. (MasterDoc indicated that on the surface it didn’t look too different, but I really felt a difference in my comfort level.) Also, I worry that cute, young, thin people will look at me, or MasterDoc or DeeDee, and think one or more of us is too old, fat, unattractive, etc. I not only sell myself short, I sell my loved ones short too. (Horrible isn’t it? I mean, if I find them to be fucking hot why don’t I believe others will too?? Again, I buy too into the narrative that says you have to be young, thin, beautiful to be sexy. Dammit Nadia, stop that!)

I actually agreed, pretty easily too, to wear the maid costume yesterday. It seemed like it would fit the situation and indeed it did. DeeDee was in Domme mode and had on a fabulous outfit. (A red and black mesh fishtail sort of skirt and her black corset. Nice!) While there were times when it felt like we were playacting, I think that’s really what we wanted – to fulfill our fantasies. To not be totally “ourselves” the whole time. We clicked well on an “ourselves” level, but we also had great fun indulging our perversions.

As I said earlier, with this woman somehow I picked up that she was keen to fuck and be kinky like I so often am. I didn’t have doubts about her desires like I do around so many women. MasterDoc and DeeDee said they had a hard time reading her and seeing her get aroused initially, but I picked up on the subtle changes in her breathing or reactions. (MasterDoc is usually the master at this, but I guess I just clicked with her in that way a little more.)

MasterDoc got her on the bed and spanked her for a bit. He caned her a little too, something she hadn’t experienced before, and he of course kept it to a minimum. (She also mentioned that her non-kinky boyfriend wouldn’t like seeing her really marked up. He doesn’t get the sense of it being sexy like us kinky freaks do.) At some point he ended up spanking DeeDee and making her come.

We had put the underbed restraints on the bed before she got there, and MasterDoc had me help put her in the restraints. This makes me think back to the first time I played with MasterDoc alone, and I ended up restrained on his living room floor thinking, “Gee, I hope my impressions of him being safe are spot on, or I could be in deep shit!” Thankfully they were spot on, and maybe my presence and the trust I so clearly have for him can help convey this level of safety to other women who come play.

The details of this interlude are fuzzy like intense sexual experiences often are. I know that I used the gigi vibe on her body – teasing her breasts, belly, and pussy. I allowed myself to get into enjoying playing with her, and as a result this was probably far hotter for her than me being shy would have been. I can’t recall if we made her come with the toys just then – or after a short break. MasterDoc left her bound in the bedroom for a few minutes and spoke to DeeDee and I out in the living room. Then he and I went back in.

I went down on her, and I think I’m finally getting over my stupid hangups about giving oral sex to women. It’s so sad that I haven’t let myself enjoy it because I’ve been fed the notion that women’s genitals are “smelly” or “dirty” my whole life. Fuck that. Eating pussy can be really fun and hot.

Perhaps this is when we took over really working her body over – MasterDoc lubed up the gigi and put it inside. I used the magic wand on her clit. We took turns pounding her with our fingers (not an easy thing to do, but she reacted the most to that). Ultimately we made her come as she lay tied down on the bed.

I was feeling patient and secure for once – while I was horny and wanted orgasms I was truly able to trust that MasterDoc would see to me sooner or later. I immersed myself in enjoying the hot perversity going on around me, and didn’t require the focus to be on me.

I teased MasterDoc at one point and he decided to cane me. Once his attention turned to me, he realized that I hadn’t come yet, and before putting our guest on the sybian, he gave me a ride. Yummy! The unyearned for orgasms are sometimes the best – the surprise satisfaction you’re given while you’re being patient and not self-centered. I squirted like a fountain, came violently, and I’m sure impressed our guest. I had to lay down after, and DeeDee was so very kind to clean up for me.

I felt fucking great. It was time to get our guest on the sybian. MasterDoc gave her a ride while DeeDee spanked her (though MasterDoc didn’t think it was hard enough) and pressed against her. (I forgot to mention that DeeDee did the same to me – it was really hot but nearly anything could have been done to me at that point and I would have found it hot.) It took a while, but she came hard and came away from the experience agreeing that the sybian is fucking awesome. She even squirted for the first time!

She and I hung out chatting while DeeDee and MasterDoc ended up in the bedroom again. We could hear DeeDee coming, and while I’m usually an insatiable slut at that point in time I was ready to hang out and chat. That’s the type of friend with benefits I want – one I can hang out with and have intelligent conversation with – not just fucking.

Our new friend had to get going, so we said our goodbyes. I let her know that I hoped she comes back. We’ll see what comes of it. Although MasterDoc is concerned we focused too much on her pleasure and not enough on her use.

A little later, I was still sooooo horny. And this week I’ve only just come to realize that I repress a certain percentage of my horniness because once MasterDoc is done having sex, I figure I should be happy with what he gives me. But this isn’t the smartest move as I’ve started feeling resentful that a man with three girlfriends isn’t giving me as much sex and play as I’d like. It’s truly okay that he sees other women and has fun with them, but my sexual needs aren’t being met 100% – despite sex with MasterDoc being the best fucking sex I have ever had in my life. I’d be thrilled to have even more sex with him, but since he is so very poly, I realize that I need to find another person to help finish meeting my sexual needs. It’s definitely not that MasterDoc is inadequate – I repressed so much because I love him and last thing I want him to feel is inadequate. But like him, I like fucking a variety of people. Plus I’m in my late 30′s and like most women my age I’m phenomenally horny. When he was younger he did some weekends of just fucking, eating, sleeping, repeat, but I don’t think it’s where he is in his life just now. But it’s where I am. And I’ve realized I should find that – the wonderfulness of being poly is that I don’t HAVE to rely on MasterDoc to meet every single little need or desire I have.

So we had a little libido dissonance – MasterDoc was ready to relax after having a whole long sexual interlude. This was not unreasonable. But I was still insanely horny. I still crave a lot more involved and creative sex than he’s been up for lately. (I’m dying for bondage. I seriously need someone to make me feel helpless and come. I was craving intoxication play last night – anything to make me feel helpless. That’s one of my many kinks – feeling helpless and having someone fuck me in that state (when it’s consensual) makes me really, really hot. I want someone to do a big elaborate scene Domming me. I crave this. I don’t crave another D/s relationship – I crave a playpartner. I’m happy with MasterDoc as my Dom. But I want to be doing more.

He likes to make sure I’m satisfied, so he did eventually get in the mood and he fucked me. I loved it. I went to bed so very happy.

(I had a lot of struggle with whether he was doing it just to make me happy. I never want a partner to have sex with me solely because I want it – I’d rather be horny and frustrated than feeling like I pressured someone into something. He had to convince me he WANTED sex too. He just wasn’t starting from the same horny spot I was in.)

Revelations (Of the Feminist and Slut Kind)

Published on June 6, 2010 in anxiety, attraction, bisexuality, emotions, Feminism, foursome, libido, musings, neurosis, random thoughts, sex, sexuality, slut, swinging and Uncategorized. 1 Comment

This is going to be a long entry. Not only did I have hot, kinky sex I want to share with you, I also had some realizations that I’m excited about too. (Ultimately, I’ve decided to make my brains’ masturbation one entry, and the actual sex another.)

I had a wonderful time yesterday – and had some revelations on what polyamory is to me. MasterDoc is poly in the sense that he likes having multiple romantic relationships concurrently. I’m poly in the sense that I prefer having one main emotional, romantic relationship and lots of friends I hang out with and fuck. Neither way is wrong, they’re just two of the many ways a person can be polyamorous. I would certainly feel affection for and care about my fuck buddies, but it would be without the intensity of a full-time relationship. I need a way to get my insane sexual needs/desires met, but I’m not really looking for another relationship. I’ve been going about things all wrong. I’ve been looking on okcupid for a woman to date. I should be looking on craigslist for a woman to FUCK.

I think I hesitate to admit that sort of thing, because then I come across as a stereotypical bisexual woman. But fuck that, I may be a bit of a stereotype at times, but I should go for what I want. (And like most stereotypes, I’m not 100% of the stereotype anyway. I can fall in love with and have a relationship with a woman, but I’d much prefer a female friend who loves to fuck and hang out with me.) I worry that I make other bi women look bad by fitting the stereotype – but there are plenty of bisexual women who can have romantic, emotional relationships with women (monogamous ones even!) but I’m not one who wants that.

Kinda hard to admit what you want is what has been vilified. It’s really hard to know that the lesbians who won’t date bisexual women will look at me and say, “See! She’s why I won’t date bi women!” I am not, however, all bisexual women. I am just me.

Yesterday we had over a woman MasterDoc found on craigslist. Just reading her ad made me think she’s a kindred spirit – and meeting her cemented that. I found myself feeling so excited to meet her, but I didn’t want to show it because while here she told us about a woman who got too clingy and she had to stop seeing because that’s not what she wants. The thing is, I’m so excited about meeting her BECAUSE she doesn’t want a relationship with a woman. To have a partner in crime who is bisexual, horny, kinky and adventurous would be fabulous. She’s smart, has an offbeat sense of humor – definitely the kind of person I want to be friends with. I’m hoping she’d be up for the same, but I realize that I have to be laid back about it lest I come across as wanting more than I actually do. But I would just like to be able to call on her and say, “Hey I have a night alone, want to come over, hang out and fuck?” And if she’s free that night (she does have boyfriend, and I think that should come first just like my relationship with MasterDoc comes first for me) then she can come over, chill out and get freaky.

It was so exciting to have that epiphany. I hold back from dating others for many reasons despite feeling frustrated and like I need more sex and more companionship, and I’ve realized that one of them is that I don’t want another emotionally intense, romantic relationship. I want a fuck buddy, a friend with benefits. Time to re-evaluate my dating strategy.

My other grand epiphany has been developing over the past week or so. We’re all so mired in the “stories” that society tells us, that even progressive feminists can fall prey to the narratives we’re told – despite them not being true. I’m often intimidated by thin women. (And I started feeling that way with our guest – she’s quite slender.) I think that thinness is so beloved in our culture that why would someone who has that want me? But that’s bullshit. I like a lot of different people – and someone being smart, funny and sexually adventurous is FAR MORE important to me than them fitting a societal body ideal. And why the fuck can’t I accept that there are thin women who feel the same way? I have such terrible self-esteem most of the time, that it had never occurred to me before – I am one of those smart, kinky, adventurous, fun people I think are so fucking sexy. Why the hell wouldn’t other people find me sexy? Sure, no one is ever going to be attractive to everyone, but I don’t give myself enough credit for my good points.

At one point I was chatting with our new pal (I’m hoping she’ll come back, she was loads of fun) while MasterDoc played with DeeDee in the next room. And I told her about the realization I had recently through a thread on fetlife and talking to someone on twitter – misogyny and the hatred of women’s bodies is so widespread that thin women deal with tons of shit about their bodies too. In the feminist movement these days we focus a lot on fat positivity, but we often do it in a way that reacts negatively to our sisters who more closely fit the “perfect” body. I forget, however, that the “perfect” body is so fucking specific that even someone who seems to fit it more closely than me can suffer from worries that they’re not the “perfect” one. Sure thinness is desired, but so are big boobs – and plenty of thin women have smaller breasts. We want this “perfect” combination of ultra thin yet curvy – and that’s not a look most people’s bodies fall into naturally. Also, I lose sight of the fact that even if someone does fit this norm, it doesn’t mean they buy into it, it doesn’t mean they can’t like me. Sure, some people are body conscious and only want to fuck other “hot” people, but I can’t assume because a woman is hot that she won’t find me to be very sexy or she can’t struggle with her own sense of body-positivity. (I need to realize this about men too.)

I’ve been so fucked up by the pervasive culture we live in that I have lost sight of these things. And when I told our new pal this yesterday she enthusiastically agreed with me that thin women get all sorts of shit about their bodies too. Misogyny is an attack on women, and part of the attack strategy is to make chubby women think that thin women are the enemy. I’ve often rejected a thin, pretty woman before she had a chance to reject me – and stupidly have ruined chances with women I might have had a great time with. I have no concept of a hot woman wanting to fuck me, but Jesus, aren’t I selling myself short? I’m buying into the societal narrative too much myself.

We had such a wonderful adventure with our new friend yesterday (I keep hoping friend is the right word – it could turn out to be a one-off but I’m hoping it’s not) that it merits its own entry. Coming up next: the hot sex foursome.

The Professor and Alexis

Published on November 8, 2009 in bdsm, blow jobs, bondage, caning, cunnilingus, D/s, dom, flogging, foursome, kink, masochism, orgasm on command, restraints, sadism, sex toys, shio, spanking, squirting, submissive, swinging and Uncategorized. 3 Comments

Saturday afternoon, a Dom and his submissive came over to MasterDoc’s place. He’s going to be known as the Professor and she is Alexis. MasterDoc connected with the Professor via Craigslist (thus prompting my tweet, “Craigslist: Bringing perverts together since 1995″) this weekend. The main plan was to give Alexis a sybian ride, but they brought some toys as well. (canes, flogger)

After they arrived, we chatted briefly. I had been made to answer the door in my maid costume, complete with fishnet stockings and high heels. MasterDoc is quite fond of it. After I tweeted that he’s “inordinately” fond of it, he’s threatened to send me to the corner store in it. I really, really, really hope he’s kidding.

Alexis knelt on the floor next to the Professor as he sat on the sofa with MasterDoc. I sat in a chair, as my relationship with MasterDoc does not have me sit on the floor (a big part of this is probably because of my knee problems). We chatted a bit. I was fairly quiet, Alexis was almost totally quiet.

When things got started, Alexis went off to the next room to change. She came back in bra and panties and thigh high boots. In the meanwhile, I went and got all the restraint pieces that go with my Liberator scoop. It took a little time, but ultimately Alexis was arranged laying over the scoop (rounded side) with her wrists and thighs cuffed to the scoop. (It comes with thigh cuffs.) The initial angle wasn’t right for MasterDoc and I to watch so he and the Professor shifted Alexis around, as if she were part of the furniture.

The spanking started, Professor taking one side, MasterDoc the other. It was a little tough since both of them are right-handed. Her ass was rosy before too long. I was asked if I wanted to give it a go, and I think I surprised MasterDoc when I said yes. Of course, I got teased for hitting her too lightly at first, so I picked up the intensity a bit. I didn’t do it for long though. Next, the Professor got out his flogger and used it on her ass. She would yelp after a particularly sharp hit. MasterDoc flogged her as well. Next came the canes. Yikes! He had a fairly thick cane (I think a bit thicker than the thickest one we have – and we’ve never gone as far as that one with me). Wow, did he leave stripes! He started out tapping it on her ass, but moved up to some sharp strikes. She would leap up as far as the restraints would allow her and cry out. He’d order her back down and she’d lay down for more caning.

MasterDoc had me get the magic wand (and the throe) so that he could tease me on the sofa while Alexis got caned. As he started teasing me, the Professor came over to get a better look. I closed my eyes and felt the thrum of the wand against my pussy. MasterDoc moved it around, teasing me. He’d put it right on my clit but move it before I could get too worked up. It was decided that the Professor was going to give Alexis six more cane strikes, and that when he got to the sixth, I was allowed to come.

MasterDoc teased me all along, and the caning seemed to take forever. When the Professor got to number six though, I came in my usual hard, screaming, writhing and squirting fashion. The Professor came over for a closer look, and I squirted a huge puddle as he watched and held my legs apart. Thank goodness we put the throe down! The couch would have been soaked with my juices. I grasped wildly at MasterDoc as I came.
Alexis’ ass was red, striped and even had a bit of flayed skin. For the rest of the afternoon, if her bottom was touched she’d yelp and wince. I don’t doubt she is still having trouble sitting. After her calmly taking the caning, it was time to make her feel good. The Professor bound her wrists with rope with a good length between them, and the men got her on the sybian. MasterDoc worked the controls (something he has gotten really skilled at) and soon she was coming very, very hard. At one point the Professor made her look at him, and then look at me. I feel awkward keeping eye contact as I know it’s something that’s very difficult for me.

After Alexis had enough, she had a rest and a cuddle with her Dom. I cuddled with MasterDoc.

Next, I was ordered on my knees in front of MasterDoc and I had to suck his cock. He ordered me to look at the Professor as I did so. I felt pretty comfortable with him, so it wasn’t quite as hard as it sometimes is, but I still had trouble keeping eye contact. Alexis was on her knees by this time sucking the Professor’s cock as he sat on the couch as well. After a bit, the men had us change places and I went right over and started sucking the Professor’s cock. Alexis started in on MasterDoc’s. The Professor asked me to lick his nipples and I did so. It was hard from that position to reach them, so he suggested I lay on the floor next to him. He lay down and I went for his nipples – something he quite enjoyed. (MasterDoc’s nipples are super-sensitive, so I have to leave his alone.) Alexis took over sucking his cock, and the Professor asked if I could straddle his head. MasterDoc was fine with this and so I did. The Professor licked at my clit and pussy and I was soon moaning. MasterDoc came over, and started slapping my face and calling me whore – and as usual that got me really hot. I moaned even more. While it’s often difficult for me to come from cunnilingus, I was on the verge of orgasm in no time. I asked MasterDoc for permission to come, and he granted it. I came hard, the Professor had a finger inside me as my muscles did their extreme clenching. Wow. I was quite happy after. I lay down to rest.

Alexis had the Professor on the verge of orgasm and he had her place her mouth firmly over his cock as he came. She swallowed every last drop of come. MasterDoc was a little bummed that she swallowed right away as he likes seeing the come in a woman’s mouth after.

The Professor and Alexis had to get going, so that was about the end of our afternoon together. It was a lot of fun and hopefully we will see them again. After that, I was itching for a beating of my own.

Swinging in the Suburbs

Published on June 22, 2009 in bisexuality, blow jobs, cunnilingus, foursome, masturbation, sex, sex parties and Uncategorized. 1 Comment

Saturday night MasterDoc and I went out to a swing club in the suburbs. He had been there the night before with S., and found it to be a good crowd. But wouldn’t it figure that the night he takes me the crowd turns out to be older? Average age – 60? 65? I was by far the youngest person there with the exception of the couple that ran the place.

Mostly I wasn’t attracted to who was there, although there was one alluring Latina (in her 40s maybe?) in a wrap dress. So I pointed her out to MasterDoc and we smiled at her and her guy. She smiled back and MasterDoc said, “Looks like we’re in.” We went over to talk with them. The lady got up, had me sit down then she sat on the arm of the sofa right by me. I ran my hand along her hip and she said that she likes that, and suggested we go into the other room. As she took my hand and we went into the next room she told the men that we were going to “talk.” Yeah, right. They didn’t believe that for one second.

So she led me into the play room – which is mostly sofas (which suck for playing on) but there’s a bed in a dark corner. She led me right over to that and started to take off her wrap dress. I took off my blouse and started touching her smooth skin. Soon, I was naked but she opted to keep her underwear on. The men came in just a couple of minutes after we went back there. Of course they wanted to watch.

I stroked her body and reached into her bra to find her nipple, which I sucked on. She sucked on mine as well and she did it with the right amount of roughness – not too hard, not too soft. She clearly liked hers sucked hard so I did so. She had me lay back on the bed, and soon the guys were getting closer to be able to see what was going on – or to be able to join what was going on – probably a bit of both. I reached into her panties and played with her clit, making sure to keep it moist with her wetness from below. Her guy reached his hand over and took over. I played with her breasts some more. She declared that she wanted to get fucked.

MasterDoc was keen to oblige but first he had me suck his cock. I got it hard and then the lady wanted to have her turn, so I let her in and as she sucked I stroked his inner thighs, the places that I know make him feel good. Unfortunately, she was rough with him, and MasterDoc has an exremely sensitive penis head. This was not a good thing.

They ended up fooling around and I think he fingered her a bit. The guy (who I wasn’t into – it’s nearly inevitable that if I meet a couple and like the woman, I’m not that into the guy) played with me a bit, and he clearly had the goal of kissing me on the mouth. I wasn’t feeling it but eventually he worked his way there. She and he took turns going down on me, and he slid a finger inside. I wished that he moved his finger a bit as I really like getting fingered. His licking didn’t do much until I spread my lips apart and made my clit more accessible. I gradually reached orgasm, and when I came I came much harder because MasterDoc said, “That’s it. Come cunt,” which sends me further over the edge.

The interlude didn’t last long, and it was early yet so we got dressed and hung out in the lounge area again. There were slim pickings for the most part. There was one woman MasterDoc was interested in, and I wasn’t too keen on either her or hubby, but of course as submissive I was up for anything he wanted. It didn’t come to pass, however.

We spent some time in the play room because it was much quieter in there, and we watched porn while cuddling. He had me suck his cock a bit, and he spanked me a bit. I’m really craving some Domination and pain lately, so the spanking was divine. We fucked in the corner of the sofa a bit later; they had a velvet sofa that lined one wall and extended around the corners to cover part of the side walls. The corner gave us a chance for me to get on my knees and have MasterDoc fuck me from behind. The position was great for me, but difficult for MasterDoc as he had to bend his knees slightly. After that, he fucked me with me laying on the sofa and this position wasn’t so hot for me. Sofas are not good fucking places. Beds, people. If you own a swing club invest in some beds, futons, what have you (and not air mattresses!). A good mat on the floor is also preferable to the narrowness of a sofa.

We didn’t end up playing with anyone else, but when we got home we fucked some more. I also used a new butt plug on him as he brought himself to orgasm. (Oh so many reviews coming down the pike!) I’ve been so focused on not pushing MasterDoc’s cock out when I come lately that I haven’t been coming hard. So even though I loved the sex we had, I still felt unrelieved at the end of the evening. I asked if I could masturbate, and MasterDoc was surprised. I explained why, and he pointed out that he had only ordered me to not push his cock out that one time – I’m not expected to worry about it every single time we fuck. So now I know better for next time. He let me masturbate and he lent a hand to stroking my body and slapping my face. I felt so much better after I came.

Davey’s Birthday

Published on February 9, 2009 in blow jobs, flogging, foursome, gang bang and sex parties. 0 Comments

This past week Davey had a birthday, and besides the usual taking him out to dinner and giving him a couple of gifts and a card, I participated in something he put together – a “reverse” gang bang. I don’t know that “reverse” is truly accurate, it’s a gang bang, but merely one where the women outnumber the man. He invited myself, S. and a new woman he’s been seeing who we’ll call Raven. This brings the number up to three, which is more than last year’s threesome S. and I gave him for his birthday. I wonder if next year will bring the number up to four women. *grin* Of course, leading up to this I kept saying to Davey that I had no idea what he was going to do with three of us at once. Certainly, he wanted us taking turns blowing him. And he wanted to fuck each of us. But how do you rev up and keep warm three women at once?

At some point on Friday night either MasterDoc or S. came up with an idea – MasterDoc could be fluff boy! He would warm us up and keep us warm for Davey. It turned out to be a brilliant idea, especially since I react far more to kink than vanilla sex these days. MasterDoc gave me a flogging to start the whole thing off. Soon, the ladies were in bed with Davey, taking turns going down on him. Now, he hadn’t had any luck finding a female condom (believe me, he searched all the local stores on Sunday morning) so it looked like he was going to end up only being able to fuck me up the ass. (He didn’t seem THAT disappointed.) But while we were getting things going, somehow the idea of the avanti condom came up – it’s a male condom made of the same polyurethane as the female condom – ergo, it does not break down when it comes in contact with oil. Amazingly, S. had one at her place. Hooray! Davey would get his wish to fuck all three of us after all.

There was a rotating parade of women for Davey: going down on him, licking his neck (where he’s so sensitive), licking his balls, caressing him. He was in heaven. Raven rode him for a while. Next he took a turn fucking me. (MasterDoc had warmed me up with a little bit of flogging and oral sex – yay!) We had to make the round with me count as we only had one polyurethane condom. (BTW, my vagina should be latex-ready again at this point.) Davey gets really excited at sex with me and he had a great orgasm.

We took a break, MasterDoc and I went out to get dinner while the other three played around from what I understand. After dinner, it was time for round two and Davey fucked S. this time. She squirted a river (when doesn’t she squirt a river) and bathed his balls in her come. He got cleaned up after and Raven rode him again (that girl has energetic thighs!) MasterDoc headed out early. S. and I got to chatting while Davey fooled around with Raven, so she and I went into the living room to leave them alone. From what I hear he had a good time. (There was loads of new relationship energy going on between those two.) Davey slept like a log last night and had a hard time getting up in the morning. We ladies succeed in what we should have done for him – we exhausted him. He is a very happy man.

Sexy Evening

Published on September 21, 2008 in bdsm, bisexuality, D/s, foursome, orgasm on command, sex and threesome. 0 Comments

It took me a while to write this entry, as so much went on last night. I hope I remembered it all!

Last night a couple I’ve gotten to know on fetlife came to see us. The wife had come on her own before and this time her husband came along as well. They’re both fans of this blog. Max, the husband, brought me a book on karate because he said he saw some parallels to it and bdsm. He inscribed the book to me. I was really touched.

We all talked for a while, sipping wine, and MasterDoc came over to sit next to me to try to get things started. He had me take my pants off, get on my knees in front of the sofa and bend over. He demonstrated some spanking and I felt pretty sensitive, I think from having been spanked so much over the weekend already. He encouraged Max and G. to come over and try spanking me. They both did a little, thankfully much softer than MasterDoc does it. (Yeah I know, I shouldn’t complain, most of the time I love it.) I got to enjoy being the center of attention as the three of them took turns spanking and caressing me. MasterDoc gave the nea to Max and he started playing with my cunt with it. He buzzed it around my clit and hole. He tried using it penetratively, which doesn’t work so well, so I told him that it’s best on my clit. I was the only person who was half naked for a while.

Next, MasterDoc had me sit on the sofa, legs spread, one leg over his lap. He took a glass toy that the couple had brought and slipped a condom over it. He slid it in me, exploring how it felt. I had never used a glass dildo before and I was glad to get to try one (although I should have one on the way from Babeland to review). The bumps in the glass were nice and the shape of the dildo let it bump against my g-spot quite easily. MasterDoc teased me with it, getting me breathless and wanting to come. He switched to his fingers when it turned out that the glass toy was a bit too much when it hit my cervix (used shallowly it works quite well). He fingered me and had me begging to come. He decided to have Max and G. take turns fingering me. (Max hurt his hand this week and ended up taking a break to get something to drink and take some pain medicine.) G. fingered me, and MasterDoc told me to come and I came at his command. I grabbed tightly onto him as I rode the waves of orgasm. He slapped my thighs while I was coming – which really friggin hurt! (Funny how sometimes it’s, “Yes, yes, hurt me!” and other times I wish I could say, “Bloody hell, that hurt! Cut it out!”) G. stopped fingering me and MasterDoc got her to do it some more. He told me right away to come as quickly as possible. It took a moment but soon I did again, and hard.

We had been enjoying some chocolate for dessert and a piece left on the dvd player melted somewhat. MasterDoc dabbed some of the melted chocolate on my inner thighs. G. licked the chocolate off and it felt heavenly. She’s very sensual and sexy and I loved having her tongue slide across my thighs.

We moved to the bedroom. Max had wandered off outside to get some gatorade to have with his pain meds. (He sliced a tendon in his hand the other day. Ouch). That left me, MasterDoc and G. alone. They lay on the bed on either side of me and played with my breasts and took turns playing with my cunt. It felt wonderful. I just closed my eyes and laid back and enjoyed the sensations. MasterDoc took off my collar so I could feel less subby and be more active. It was hard to get out of the mindset, however.

He had me put G. in between us and we each took a side, playing with her breasts. I stroked her clit, which seemed to really turn her on. He fingered her for a bit, and then I took a turn, then he took a turn again. I’m not sure if we made her come, however it’s really beautiful to watch a woman’s face up close when she’s experiencing pleasure. The way her facial muscles tense up, the sighs she lets out. It’s a delight.

Eventually Max made his way back to the apartment and joined us on the bed. He got naked and pressed up close behind me. He slid a hand between my legs and I enjoyed the sensation of being played with. MasterDoc was getting ready to fuck G. and I tried to watch as much as possible as I find it really hot to watch him with someone else. Max kept murmuring in my ear how happy he was to meet me. It’s kinda funny having a fan, I didn’t expect to be looked at as a minor (very minor, lol) celebrity for my blogging. I’m just some kinky girl who likes to blog, and yet there’s a few people out there who think what I do is great and feel a little star struck around me. It’s sweet and a strange feeling at the same time. It’s a nice feeling, very flattering, but it makes me wish I was the “being worshipped” type of gal as I’d really get into it then. (It’s a pity. I know various bottomy-type men who are wonderful, who I’m very fond of, but in bed I just want to be taken and used so we’re not really sexually compatible. I’m really glad I met MasterDoc because he can use me roughly and yet still be wonderful.) I ended up going down on Max a bit, he went down on me and I continued to watch MasterDoc play with G. I guess sometimes I am a little voyeuristic.

It was getting late and MasterDoc decided he was going to bed. Max had gotten a late start and we ladies couldn’t just leave him hanging, so we took turns going down on him, giving him handjobs, playing with his ass. He was in heaven having two lovely ladies playing with him. He had me straddle his face for a while. We played for quite a while but an orgasm didn’t seem to be in the cards for him. Pity. He fucked G. for a bit and I watched. Then MasterDoc came in to ask everyone to be a little more quiet so as not to disturb the neighbors, and we all decided to call it a night at that time. I cuddled up to MasterDoc for a few minutes before we went to sleep and reflected on the fun evening we had had. I just know I’m leaving little tidbits out of this entry, but I don’t want to make it longer than it already is. I think you get the idea that it was a very sexy and sensual evening with a really nice couple. (And now two blog readers have become part of the story here.)