Archive for the 'bdsm' Category

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I got lost in my head during play Tuesday night, so apologies if this account is disjointed. I had been overdue for a beating, so MasterDoc took to my ass with the riding crop and cane. He started off light, and very gradually increased intensity. He did it in such a way that by the time he was whacking me hard he was able to tell me to come. I came from the pain. I came from him having control. For some unknown reason that still amazes me.

We watched some porn – and this time I actually watched instead of being distracted by him fucking me. I stroked his hair as we lay by each others side. As the porn turned me on I started touching myself. I played with my breasts and nipples, something I rarely do during masturbation. I shyly reached a hand down to my pussy and started playing there. Intermittently, I’d touch him, stroking his back.

Right before having sex with me, MasterDoc looked me in the eye and told me that I was to hold off coming indefinitely. I was not allowed to beg for orgasm like I usually do. Just him giving me this directive, with that firm look in his eyes, made me wet. I struggled to keep my arousal under control as he fucked me. But of course I just kept thinking about how hot it was that he could use my body for his pleasure. It seems as if telling me not to come makes me just want to come more!

We cuddled up after the fucking, and his phone rang. This distracted me so when he told me to come a moment later, I wasn’t anywhere near ready to come. He talked to me about keeping with where we are mentally. After all, the phone can be ignored. I’ll try to do better next time.

My memories of that evening are in bits and pieces, so forgive me if this isn’t as coherent as most posts.

As we cuddled I did some spot worship (see 5th paragraph in that post), and he called me the “High Priestess of Spot Worship.” Hee hee. I know how to play with his special spot really well by now. I stroke his chest languidly, focusing on “the spot” but also touching the rest of his torso – from tummy to collar bone. I’ve joked that I want a sex toy company to make a toy version of his spot so if I ever lose him I can stroke it for comfort.

He had me suck his cock for a while, and I struggled a bit with the reservoir tip of the condom tickling the back of my throat. That’s the only thing I truly hate about blow jobs with condoms.

At one point, I was laying down in such a way that I was looking up at him – and I mentioned that I loved the perspective. Having him above me like that felt so representative of the power dynamic between us. I thought about the idea of him being a god for the length of our scenes. The majority of the time, we’re two humans with strengths and weaknesses. But when we play we can be something else for a while. He can be a god to me, and I can feel safe in his arms. He can be in control, which he likes and I can give up control, which I like. (Of course, ever the irreverent Dom, MasterDoc made some funny noises and hand motions when I said I liked the perspective. Kinda changed the feeling!) Many times that night I felt like declaring I’m his, over and over.

He fucked me from behind a couple of times with that order not to come or ask to come still applying. His cock wasn’t cooperating as much as he would have liked, so the fucking didn’t last long. He had intended to fuck me until he came.

I was feeling really ready for limit pushing, and he had me give his asshole a big kiss. I still don’t like doing it, but it’s hot in the way that I’m being told what to do. Thankfully it is always freshly cleaned when he has me do it. I still pause a second and give him a “do I have to?” look before doing what he tells me to do.

We took a break, and he checked on DeeDee. (She struggles with depression like I do, and was having a tough day.) MasterDoc planned to fuck me later that night as I got so drowsy I was ready to fall asleep, but that got put off. (Something for the wishing box.)

The Mind is the Most Potent Sex Organ

In contrast to the other night when I was needing cuddles and reconnection with MasterDoc, last night I was feeling really subby and really eager to push limits.

We were getting settled in the bedroom when he received a phone call. I cuddled him for a moment, then he motioned to me to suck his cock while he talked on the phone. I slid my way down his body and worked his cock with my mouth. He was hard by the time the phone call was over.

He gripped my hair as I gave him head. And a while into the blow job I got a pervasive fantasy of mine fulfilled – he choked me on his cock. Truly choked me. I had his dick down my throat as he held my head down. My mind raced with the hotness of how much control he has. Even when I started to gag, I didn’t panic but found it highly erotic. It seems like my mouth will manage to push it out when it becomes physically vital to do so; there’s no real worry of actually suffocating. I rested on his stomach after, shuddering because I was so hot from what he did to me. He and I both agreed that it was super hot, and he did it to me again. Fuck. This turned me on so much that as I licked at the base of his cock afterward, he told me to come and I did. He hadn’t touched my erogenous zones at all by that time, so I came purely from being turned on by blowing him and being choked on his cock.

I realize that it can be hard for some people to understand why cock choking is hot. I didn’t get it for a long time – I used to feel uneasy watching rough porn where the woman is choked and ends up with drool all over her chin. Somehow that changed, perhaps because I’m with someone I trust? I’m with someone who I want to push my limits. It turns me on to take more and more kinky things for him. I like the feeling that he’s in control. (Granted this is not always easy when he wants me to do something I don’t really want to do.)

He made me come again verbally. I grabbed onto his thighs as I flailed about.

A little later, he put on some porn. As I spooned against him I watched only for a moment before I felt his fingers in my hair. He grabbed hold firmly (near the scalp) and slowly, gently tugged. Not enough to really hurt, but enough to show me who’s in control. This went on for a little while, and yet again I’m amazed by how easily he turns me on these days. The brain really is the largest sexual organ.

He had started fucking me from behind when he received another phone call. He told me, “You need to be quiet, slut. Understand?” I said that I did and he picked up the phone call. He talked on the phone with someone while fucking me. That was just so hot. I know in a less subby mindset I might not have thought so (I might have been upset that I was being ignored) but in a subby mindset I got really turned on thinking about how I’m his slut and he can just recreationally, casually, plunder my body while he attends to something and someone else entirely. I stifled all but a few quiet gasps and moans. After the call was done he fucked me hard and made me come. My cunt pushed his cock out and he continued with his adept fingers. I squirted all over his hand.

Earlier, he had talked about pissing on me, and I had forgotten about it by that point. But he told me to come with him and he led me into the bathroom. He had said that he wanted me to act like it’s the hottest thing ever for him to be pissing on me. He told me that soon, whether he pisses in my mouth or not will depend on how convincing I am when he’s pissing on me. I worried, of course, that I wouldn’t be able to, but I think he has me conditioned now to come under many circumstances, and I rubbed my clit to orgasm as he pissed on me.

I showered off and we took a break. He wanted to get DeeDee to join us but she was distracted by a good Hercule Poirot mystery on PBS.

Eventually he and I made our way, separately, back to the bedroom. He was dealing with another phone call, so I sucked his cock as earlier he decided that that’s what he wants me to do when he gets a call and I’m around. I was eager for more fucking, but MasterDoc wanted the Lelo Bob in his ass. He got on hands and knees and stroked his cock as I warmed up his ass by massaging and lubing it up.

After slowly and gently working a finger in, I slid my finger out and lubed up the Bob. I spread his ass wide so I could be sure I was pushing it against his sphincter. Once the widest part was in, the rest slid in easily. I worked the plug a little, pressing it forward towards his prostate. Then I left the plug alone and massaged his thighs and ass. He tugged on his cock while I continued to do whatever I could to increase his pleasure. He told me to come, and I came while he did. I think we’ve achieved some sort of hypnotism without trying. Imagine what MasterDoc could do if he tried. Last night, the fucking/fingering was the only time I came with my genitals being touched by anything. MasterDoc is fucking amazing. I’m sure it’s not only him (although he is amazing) but also the combination of the two of us together.

Magic Hands

MasterDoc provided a great deal of affection and orgasms on Sunday. It was wonderful to move past feeling triggered and into enjoying hot sex with my sexy Dom. These days, he can turn me on so much just by touching my body. It doesn’t have to be overtly sexual at all. Having him close to me, touching me, gets me hot. He fucked me at the end of the bed, and I squirted a TON. The Liberator Fascinator throe was still wet the next day! He has a great cock and I just love when he fucks me.

Monday night, I was fortunate as well. He’s going to be away for a bit at a wedding, so we’ve been packing in a lot of time together. DeeDee went off to look at a potential apartment for herself. MasterDoc lay in bed next to me and he played with my body until I was quivering in his hands. He grasped my hair with one hand, kissed me deeply, and toyed with my pussy at the same time. I melted into how good and safe I feel in his arms. He briefly kissed my neck – something I love but he doesn’t do often (to be fair I don’t do it often to him either).

As I got wet, he talked to me to encourage me to reach and sustain my arousal on the edge of coming. His teasing me verbally was like extra fingers touching my erogenous zones. Then…. he took his hand away from my pussy. He told me to come. I came instantly and hard as he stroked my body, gradually working down to my pussy. The touches were gentle and slow to start, but increased in intensity as his hands traveled down my body and I continued coming. When he slid his fingers in my pussy I thought I would explode. I reached the highest crescendo as he prodded my g-spot.

I stroked his body as I came down, pressing against him. I love having him touch me – be it sexual or cuddles. I love playing with that spot on his chest that various women have taken to.

We needed to review Bob, a Lelo buttplug for men. I stroked his body as he did something on his laptop, and when he was ready I lubed up my hands and started massaging his ass. Very slowly I worked a finger in to get his ass warmed up. I added extra lube a couple of times, as you can’t have too much lube when it comes to anal. He told me it was time to try the toy, and I slid Bob into his ass. (Beforehand, I joked around with him that I was going to tease his “incurably straight” self by saying, “And now Bob is going in your ass! Does Bob feel good in your ass?”)

But in the heat of the moment I didn’t joke. I had my collar on anyway. The toy slid in easily, and MasterDoc had me move it around a bit. I could tell from the gasps, twitches and sighs coming from him that he liked it. At one point he took over moving the plug, and I reached over him and massaged his groin. I like to imagine that this felt incredible. I love making him feel good.

He didn’t come in the end, but overall enjoyed the plug. We’re going to try it again before writing an official review.

I spent some time cuddled behind him as he faced his laptop on the bed and got some things done. I was deeply in sub mode and I lay there fantasizing about being a slave, shackled and left to wait until he needed me again. I couldn’t do that sort of thing all the time, but within a scene it could be pretty freaking hot.

Troublesome Tart

Monday afternoon MasterDoc and I got some time alone, and I’m really happy to say he listened to my wishes for using bondage. *happy dance* He had me lay on the bed and he secured my wrists and ankles with the underbed restraints. I was so turned on by being restrained. No, seriously. The simple act of being bound made me hot. This is why I’ve been begging for bondage. MasterDoc teased me with his mouth. He crawled up beside me and teased me with his fingers. He sucked hard on my breasts until the pain made me moan. He got me incredibly worked up and then left me there.

I lay in the bedroom alone and bound for what felt like several minutes. Instead of letting my mind wander and get impatient, I focused on how helpless I was. I would pull against the restraints gently to remind myself that I couldn’t get up and this alone was enough to get me moaning and horny. I love fantasizing about  MasterDoc being all-powerful and me being helpless. (I can haz more pls?)

When he returned, he had an ice cube in a baggie. He knows I hate ice/being cold. But in this situation it turned me on even more because he was free to do something to me I don’t like. Yes, the helplessness again. He iced my nipple until the cold began to hurt. He followed up with the ice on my clit – again there was pain after a while but this turned me on. He worked me up and over until he shoved the ice in my pussy and made me come. Fuck. Being tormented never felt so good.

He undid one of my wrists after that, and cuddled with me a bit. He told me to undo my other wrist and while my ankles were still bound he made me come again. I was in heaven.

We took a break and fixed dinner right after this, and he said something teasingly mean in the kitchen. I told him, “You’re mean!” but a few seconds later I sheepishly admitted, “And it turns me on a lot when you’re mean.”

After dinner we sat on the sofa and looked through Kink Academy’s scene starter/humiliation cards.  Most of the humiliation term ideas were over the top for us, but it was good for a laugh. As MasterDoc read from the cards, he came across “porn addicted masturbator.”  In perfect deadpan he said, “No, that’s me,” and moved on to the next card. He found one insult that he thought suited DeeDee (especially since she was out with one of our friends fucking a friend of this friend). “Nasty greedy raunchy dirty whore” He couldn’t wait to share that with her when she got home. He also liked “semen swasher” and “troublesome tart.” (I like that one too. And, well, sometimes it fits me.)

He gave me a bit of a hard time about wanting more sex, but I protested that I didn’t think I asked for too much. I was surprised he gave me a hard time, because it was implied earlier that we’d get up to more. He took me back in the bedroom and fucked me from behind. I loved being used as his slut. I was in such a subby mindset that I kept envisioning me as just a whore with a hole for him to take his pleasure from. God that’s hot. He fucked me well twice and made me come hard, squirting all over. My vaginal muscles didn’t push him out right away, so he kept pounding me while I came. I was screaming for what seemed to be many minutes (but I have no idea how long it actually was). I hope the neighbors didn’t worry about the screaming.

Independence Day

Since I wear my depressive episodes on my sleeve anyone who follows my twitter knows I was in bad shape the other day. Thankfully, it has passed and I have some very understanding people in my life who realize that while I become negative and complaining during an episode, it’s not entirely what I’m thinking/feeling so much as just a chemical reaction in my brain.

But some things do get brought up when I’m in that state that are bothering me just below the surface. I gave MasterDoc a hard time about our sex life becoming more and more routine. It can be frustrating when he seems to put effort and creativity into trysts with women he’s not involved with, but not so much with me (or DeeDee). Now granted, even a routine sex life with MasterDoc is pretty hot and satisfying. And one of the wonderful things (I say that a lot, don’t I? There’s many wonderful things.) about MasterDoc is that he will look at criticism and see if it has merit. He acknowledged that there is some truth to my complaints.

After talks, hugs and hanging out, my depression lifted. On Saturday night after MasterDoc made DeeDee come and subsequently conk out, he took me into the other bedroom and went down on me. This is something he doesn’t do often, and we were chatting about that earlier in the day. He dove in and did a fantastic job eating my pussy. He had me moaning and heading towards orgasm in mere moments. As he had me come, he put fingers inside me AND pressed down just above my pubic bone with the other hand while still licking my clit. Holy fucking christ I had an incredible orgasm. Even more incredible than usual. He joked about how he was sorry it was just plain sex and not something creative. I had to laugh because of course it was more than wonderful. I crave more bdsm scenes, but the sex we do have is pretty damn hot.

Sunday night the three of us went out to the swing club. MasterDoc, DeeDee and I seem to be becoming more and more triad-like as time goes on. It’s not unusual for us to show up as a unit to the swing club. The three of us took over the large bed and DeeDee and I took turns sucking MasterDoc’s cock. DeeDee started him off, and I cuddled with him. He decided that in honor of Independence Day we would be allowed to come when we choose to (now granted, we each might decide some teasing is desired, but it was all left up to us). After telling me this, he had me swap places with DeeDee and he told her the same and one or two other things, such as him considering letting us select one guy to fuck.

The swing club was having a private party that night and the host, a friendly (and kinky) guy we know, came in with his new paddle. He told MasterDoc that he was welcome to break the paddle in, and so MD had DeeDee and I get on all fours on the bed, asses in his direction. He alternated paddling us. I hadn’t had a paddling in a while and it definitely suited me. He switched to fingering us at the same time and soon we’re both coming. (Picture, if you will, MasterDoc kneeling on the bed behind us with his right hand in my cunt and his left hand in DeeDee’s cunt.) The party host commented afterward that it was impressive to watch MasterDoc “pussy DJ.” MasterDoc loves the showmanship of sex and he would vary what he did to us to get us to make noise in time with the music. He’d focus on DeeDee, then on me, then both of us so we were moaning in unison. I came quickly and for a long time. These days I forget how fast I’m able to orgasm since I always have to ask permission. It was lovely for a change of pace, but I like the way he teases me so I wouldn’t want it like that all the time.

After a rest and cuddles, he had DeeDee and I give him a dual blow job – she was licking one side, I the other. We both started giggling when her tongue pretty much left his cock and got together with my tongue. I giggled thinking MasterDoc was pushing her head a bit to encourage her – but it turned out he had no idea why we were giggling! DeeDee was more aggressive than usual and it surprised me a bit because I remember back to last year when MasterDoc met her and he told me that she was curious about doing things with women, but didn’t think she would be comfortable kissing one. I was happy to go along with it however, as clearly she was ok with what she was doing.

As DeeDee cuddled against MasterDoc’s back and stroked his ass and back (as far as I could tell), he leaned in to me and we kissed a bit. He touched my body and soon I was on the verge of orgasm. I could feel DeeDee’s hand reach out for my nipple and I enjoyed coming as they played with my body.

We got dressed, got drinks and had a seat in the main area. Coincidentally, the spotlight was on MasterDoc’s cock. This inspired him to have us take turns blowing him and with a hard cock he asked if I wanted to be fucked. Oh yes! He had me bend over the  back of the couch and he fucked me. Unfortunately, this didn’t last long as the couch is right against a wall, a very hard wall, and my head kept hitting it despite my best efforts to keep it  clear of the wall. We had to find another spot.

We moved to the exhibitionists room just a few steps away (it’s part of the main area, just set off by some very sheer curtains). MasterDoc decided to give me a beating and DeeDee suggested implements from the toy bag to him. My pain tolerance was quite good and he gave me quite a beating. (DeeDee later said she was impressed by what I took.) Since I had permission to come whenever I wanted, I came due to just the beating. The orgasm lasted a while while he kept caning my ass. My ass was quite sore after, but I had had a great time.

I suggested that DeeDee was overdue for an orgasm. He says, “What? She’s due for a beating?” He loves to tease us and make it seem like we’re trying to give the other one trouble. Because she was so enthusiastic about giving him impact toys to use on me, he decided that he should use the same ones on her. I was proactive for once and I lent a hand playing with her clit without his even encouraging me. DeeDee came easily. I got the nea and used that on her clit next. MasterDoc followed through on something he had promised earlier that evening – that he would use my anal beads on her as a tail. He had her suck on the beads to moisten them, and I tried being helpful and held up the bottle of lube, which thankfully he used. So the beads were placed only about half way in, and he told her, “Now, arf!”

“Oh Sir! Please no!” DeeDee moaned with her face buried in her arms (ass in the air). He got her to bark like a dog, much to her humiliation. In order to be able to come again, he made her arf one final time. She did after a few moments as I suppose the desire for orgasm outweighed the humiliation. As MasterDoc played with her cunt, I remembered his admonition for no idle hands – either help play with someone else – or play with yourself. I opted to play with myself and soon I came again as DeeDee did. I squirted this time, and got my dress a little wet. Thankfully it’s warm out so the damp dress wasn’t as uncomfortable as it could have been.

A few people had stopped by to watch as she came while my hand was holding the nea to her clit and MasterDoc was playing with the anal beads. DeeDee was so embarrassed after that she didn’t want to leave the area and face the people who might have been watching her humiliation.

A Good Schtupping (Or Three)

I had been horny for days. MasterDoc spent the weekend with one of his other ladies, and I didn’t make an effort to find other venues of sexual satisfaction. Not besides masturbation anyway. I did watch porn and rub one out a couple of times over the weekend, and while it felt good it’s not the same intensity as hot fucking with someone you’re completely hot for.

I flirted with MasterDoc from my droid while at work yesterday. He teased me about maybe I would get some sex that night. I asked him if he wanted me to beg. “Begging never hurt,” he said. I started saying how I would go down on my knees in front of him and beg for his cock inside me. He teased me a bit more later on, saying that he was horny then and I’d better get there soon or he’d be all done by the time I did. He really does love teasing me. Leaving work to go fuck him sounded marvelous, but this is the real world and I needed to finish the day.

We found some porn, and quite honestly I don’t remember much about it. I didn’t watch a lot of it. He had me put my collar on and set up the bed. The throe was in the laundry so I had to fold a couple of towels in case I squirted. I lay with my back to him so we could both see the porn. I used the nea on my clit to get worked up and he asked me if I could feel his cock against my back. Indeed I did, and his mentioning focused my attention on him stroking his cock behind me. I would shudder now and then, because even though the nea hadn’t gotten me to a point of orgasm yet, having him pressed against me turned me on so much.

He fucked me from behind, taking his time. When we start out fucking I’m feeling pretty conscious of my surroundings, perhaps thinking some incompatible thing like, “Gee, I hope I’m wet enough. I wonder if I’ll get turned on quickly.” But as he slides his big cock in and out of me, those coherent thoughts slip away, and I clench my eyes shut, bite my thumb, and moan as the sensations in my cunt start leading me to orgasm. When he takes a moment to thrust harder I’m immediately pushed to a point where I could come. He hasn’t given permission yet, so I teeter on the edge, yearning for that final release.

He tells me to come, and I immediately fly into orgasm. My pussy clenches, I moan really loudly (or, perhaps, scream a little) and a trickle of come squirts out of my pussy onto my hand holding the nea to my clit. Thankfully MasterDoc made sure I was over the towels so I didn’t soak the bed.

He made me come for a long time and I felt so spent after. I lay there recovering but soon my rampant horniness kicked in again, and I started playing with his chest. He likes how I’ve learned to use my hands to make him feel good. I play with his chest hair. Sometimes I lick his chest. I stroke the spot where hip meets thigh meets crotch. And I massage his inner thighs.

He has me suck him for a while with the condom still on, telling me to get it hard again and maybe he’ll put it back in me. His pubic hair smells of my pussy like crazy. I suck hard on his cock as I know the condom deadens the sensation a bit. I keep fighting with the reservoir tip with my tongue so it doesn’t tickle the back of my throat.

He fucks me again, same position. As he’s slowly starting to fuck me, he tells me a “funny story” about the woman he had fucked the night before. She was a former submissive playmate of his who he hasn’t seen in several years. She’s now single and hadn’t gotten laid in months. Ever the philanthropist (or dog, I can’t recall which) MasterDoc offered to give her some occasional schtupping to help her hold out until she meets someone new she is comfortable with. As he fucked me, he told me about how he had told her that he wanted to come on her face. This was an order from Dom to submissive playmate, not just a, “Gee honey would you do this?” When he came, she kept his cock in her mouth and he ended up coming in her mouth. After, he asked her what happened to the come. She said very quietly, shyly that she had wanted his come in her mouth and that she had swallowed it. As a Dom, he was thrown a little. He *should* punish her for deliberately disobeying. But on the other hand, he thought this was so hot. She didn’t get punished.

In the past, a story like that during sex might have put me into a fit of insecurity. This time, it was so fucking hot. My Dom, wanted by many other women, was telling me, his sub, how he fucked another woman the day before and she was a slut who wanted his come in her mouth. After he reached the end of his tale, he quietly said, “You may come.” And come I did, squirting all over again.

We took a break to make and enjoy dinner, as we had started the fucking before. After dinner we sat on the couch with the intention of more playing. He got distracted on his laptop, so I leaned in and put my head on his shoulder. I was all worshipful and hopeful that he’d fuck me again.

In the bedroom, he had me play with his ass, massaging his prostate. It seemed like the kind of activity that would lead to him coming, which I hoped for even though I wanted to be fucked again. I stroked the walnut-textured gland through his anus and enjoyed watching him feel good courtesy of my hands.

He fucked me a third time and there was more coming and squirting. As he had me get on hands and knees (the same position as the past couple of times) he commented on how he must be boring. I gave him an impish look, but didn’t say anything. While it would be nice for more varied positions, I don’t think he’s boring. (How could I!?) I just think now and then he needs to be re-inspired to try different and new things.

After I came, I was still so turned on and wanted him to come in MY mouth so badly. I touched and massaged him as best I knew how in an attempt to make him come. I licked his chest, rubbed against him and felt so turned on that I could possibly come myself. I played with his ass and lowered my head so that I was eye to eye with his cock as he stroked it. I licked my lips hoping for him to shoot a load in my mouth. I told him this, and then a short while later I tried bringing out the big weapons and told him that at that point I was then thinking about him coming on my tits and me licking it off. Sadly, he decided not to come last night, and I reluctantly laid off stimulating him.

As horny as I was though, I asked him if I could make myself come. He teased me for a bit – asking me if I would still be good Wednesday night when a Dom and sub were slated to come over. He asked his usual – will I fuck who he tells me to no matter what I think of the guy? I promise to do so as I’m desperate to come, and he plays with my cunt as I use the nea on my clit. He gets me more and more worked up talking about how he’s not sure if he should let me come, and am I sure that I will do what he wants tomorrow night? I get more and more turned on thinking about being his whore and fucking whoever he says. It’s like him fucking me by extension. (And when I related this thought to him later, he said that’s the right way to look at it.) I came when he gave permission and he grabbed my throat – not tight enough to constrict but tight enough to push me over the edge some more. I came so very hard yet again.

Lately I feel like I could spend all my time just fucking him.

The Beast with Three Backs

What a busy weekend! What a busy Saturday! Late Saturday afternoon, MasterDoc had a guy over for a show. This guy replied to MasterDoc’s ad for a bdsm lesson since his girlfriend is interested in being sub. He asked intelligent questions and knew more than many people who come by for a lesson. DeeDee led him in in her maid outfit. MasterDoc and I came into living room shortly after and sat and talked with him. After feeling out what the guest knew and was interested in, MasterDoc had me get a pillow and get on my knees. I blew MasterDoc while he continued to talk to the guest. Sometimes I feel shy when being a slut like this. I think – “Wow, so many people would think negatively for me being such a slut. I have a fantastic time doing it however.” I guess the taboo of it is part of the hotness.

I got to listen to MasterDoc giving out all his domly secrets. Ha ha. He mentioned doing things I didn’t realize he did deliberately. I often don’t realize how intentional his behavior is. The guest brought up breathplay and feeling uncomfortable doing it, and MasterDoc took the time to explain the very real risks inherent in breathplay. I think if you’re going to do edge play, you need to know the real risks before you can decide to assume those risks. As a doctor, MasterDoc understands what can go wrong and why it would go wrong. (If you’re putting pressure on the trachea to block breathing, it’s too easy to break the trachea with just a little pressure. If you’re pressing the carotid arteries to deprive the brain of oxygen, you can cause brain damage potentially if done for too long or too often. And in older subs, you can possibly cause a stroke.) After the informative lecture, MasterDoc made me come on the couch with my Nea. Despite feeling a little embarrassed having my legs spread in front of a stranger, I got so hot that my whole body was rocked with the orgasm. If you’re feeling anxious about having an audience the best thing to do is close your eyes and focus on the erotic sensations. Soon you won’t care if anyone’s watching. (By the way, DeeDee recently bought herself a Nea since she loved mine so much. Hers is black and mine is rose, so we will always be able to tell whose is whose.)

MasterDoc fetched DeeDee from her room and spanked her well, all while explaining flogger use. Her ass was delightfully pink in short order. I suddenly felt hungry and asked permission to go get a snack. Permission granted, I wandered off to the kitchen. I’m not entirely sure what went on in those few minutes I was in the kitchen. When I came back, DeeDee was sucking MasterDoc’s cock and he had me come in for a cuddle. I stroked his leg and his chest trying to enhance the blow job. It really is fun and amazing to make him feel so good. He had me switch with DeeDee and I enthusiastically sucked his cock for a while. The more I get into it, the more he seems distracted by how good it feels.

MasterDoc fucked DeeDee and had me accessorize by playing with his ass. He explained how to teasingly fuck and get a woman totally worked up before giving permission to come. MasterDoc really should write a book on being a Dom.

DeeDee lay on the mat and recovered from her orgasms while MasterDoc talked some more with the guest. Needleplay came up somehow, and MasterDoc suggested I get some needles out. There was a moment where it seemed like we couldn’t do it – MasterDoc said he’d get alcohol wipes but he forgot. Then I came up with the brilliant idea that we could use the hand sanitizer I had in my purse. Ingenuity for the win!

He prepped my ass cheek with the hand sanitizer, and then slid a needle firmly into an ass cheek. I cried out – it feels like he’s inserting the needles deeper now than he had before – more into the muscle and not as much on the surface. It’s one of those things where in mid-pierce I think, “Why the hell do I want this? This fucking hurts!” But a moment later the pain has subsided and I’m flying high on endorphins. He did another needle alongside the first.

We were all pretty worn out by that time, and MasterDoc showed our guest the door. I think he went away with a lot of useful information.

While we rested after, I started talking with DeeDee and somehow vivid memories of the role playing I did with my first boyfriend came to mind. We would play all sorts of parts – one of us the chauffeur driving my car, while the other was the wealthy boss who seduces the chauffeur. We’d pretend to be strangers picking each other up at a bar for casual sex (something neither of us had done). We pretended one person was totally naive about sex and the other initiated them into it. Getting into the headspace of being another person can be so hot. I’m craving some role play these days.

Now that I’ve started understanding age play a little, I would love to play the part of young girl being taken care of by the responsible older adult. (I indulged this fantasy in my head as I played a game on my phone while lying on the mat in the living room when MasterDoc and DeeDee went off to prepare dinner. I let myself feel the comfort of being a kid playing in the living room while dinner is made for me by two kind adults.) I would also love to play the part of a kidnapped woman. (I don’t need a realistic set up of being abducted on the street – just role playing is adequate for me. I have a vivid imagination.) Or a whore. Or someone being forcefully taken – I really like that one, a scene of consensual non-consent. The possibilities are endless. I hope MasterDoc is up for this at some point.

Later in the evening, MasterDoc spoke with our friend V online while I played more games on my phone. Before I knew it, he was having her come over to double-penetrate me. I thought at first that he meant “someday” but he meant she was getting in her car and on her way!

I took a bit of a nap because I was tired and about an hour later I woke and V was here. She had brought her medium and large silicone cocks and I chose the smaller one since she was taking the ass. (MasterDoc’s cock was going in the pussy.)
Now, I had never been successfully dp’ed before. We all warmed ourselves up with toys and what not – MasterDoc stood at the end of the bed watching us saying, “Pretend I’m a perv.”

“Pretend!” I exclaimed.

My knees were worn out, so MasterDoc had me lay on my stomach as V warmed up my ass. She lubed me up well and worked her girl cock into me. After I was stretched out adequately, MasterDoc had me get on top of his cock. V tried to penetrate me from behind after his cock was in, but getting the angle while she was strapped on proved to be impossible (for more than a second anyway). I got enough of a taste to know that feeling so filled up was a major turn on.

V unstrapped her cock, and she and MasterDoc dp’ed me that way. Holy fuck. He told me I could come as soon as she got the dildo in my ass and come I did. Harder than I would have even thought possible. I kept coming and coming and coming until they stopped the stimulation. I could not help myself from coming. I had sometimes worried that being dp’ed would be too “stuffed” but the feeling of being filled like that was fucking amazing. Hopefully someday I can manage a dp with two bio cocks.

My knees were fatigued beyond belief so MasterDoc came up with the idea to fuck me on top, while V fucked his ass with a dildo. Wow. I thought this was so hot. I just kept imagining the dildo up his ass and how good that feels and the fact that his cock was also inside me. I love that MasterDoc is not a homophobe and can, as a straight man, enjoy anal penetration.

We made sure that V had the chance to come before heading home – I ran the magic wand on her. After, I went off to get water and when I walked back in the bedroom, MasterDoc was fucking V. I took the opportunity to help out and started playing with his ass. As I worked a finger in his ass (already lubed from before), I realized that my finger was facing the wrong way – towards his back. I rotated it around and started massaging his prostate. This went over very, very well with MasterDoc. I knelt on the floor (he was standing at the end of the bed fucking V) and played with his ass while he fucked her. It’s not easy to do, but I could manage it for a while.

All in all, yesterday was a really active, hot day. I am so fortunate to have so much fun with MasterDoc, DeeDee and V.

Flirtation and Flogging

I had a fabulous time Friday night! I don’t often name specific clubs or parties here, but Sir Magnus Romello’s bdsm parties (Avant Garde Loft) are ones to watch! They have really taken off. Look them up on fetlife.

I was a little more confident and I flirted with one of Sir Magnus’ submissives pretty blatantly. (I will call her Sofija here. She is Serbian so I picked out a Serbian name for her courtesy of a google search.) I had emailed her after meeting last time and we were maybe going to meet up for coffee. (But her Sir insisted she catch up on sleep while on that break from work. Fair enough.) Hitting on her was easier due to getting a clear vibe that she is interested too. But can you see it? Me – the Queen of the Lesbian Sheep Dance – I was forward. No joke.

I was more social this time around. Initially I thought Sofija didn’t remember me which bummed me out, but it was really down to dim lighting, my new bangs, and her being a little tipsy – she didn’t recognize me at first but then she was happy to see me. When MasterDoc saw my opportunity to chat with her, he pulled DeeDee away to walk around and left me talking with Sofija and her friend. Sofija invited me to come along with them when they went elsewhere in the club and I followed. We joked around with Sofija’s strap on and I was feeling pretty confident and good. Her friend for the evening was visiting from the south and she was a young (18 or 19 years old), gorgeous woman. (Tall, slim, pretty – and yet in conversation with her later that night it turns out she doesn’t realize how gorgeous she is. I hate how women are taught to feel insecure in our society.) I was thrilled when the younger woman had trouble believing that Sofija is in her early thirties and me in my late thirties. She said, “Everyone looks younger up here!”

The social period went on, I got side tracked from following Sofija and friend by running into DeeDee who was talking with a fem Domme. People are really quite friendly for the most part at these parties. I can see myself going regularly and getting to be friendly with some people. (Unlike when I wrote about another New York party on here that I didn’t enjoy as much.)

I was thrilled when MasterDoc started setting things up to flog me. He and DeeDee put my wrists in cuffs and attached me to a low St. Andrew’s cross. MasterDoc flogged me – first with the little flogger, then interrupted to spank me with his hands, and then the big flogger. He struck both my ass and my upper back. He was pretty intense with the hits and he even worked in the cane a few times. I cried out as loud as I could to be heard over the music. I checked in with him at one point to make sure he could hear me crying out. He said simply, “Yes,” and went back to work. Ok, then. As long as he was aware at how much pain he was causing, I was okay with that.

He teased me with a vibe, but the difficult thing is when you’re reaching around a woman from the back, it’s much harder to find her clit than from the front. He teased me a whole lot, mostly not on quite the right spot. He told me I could come ad-lib and as I started coming he pulled the toy away. Fuck. Orgasm interruptus. (He could hear cries of pain over the music but not the more subtle sounds of impending orgasm.) He had DeeDee help out with using the toy while he flogged me but bless her heart she’s still learning and couldn’t get the vibe on the right spot. I started laughing because the situation was kinda funny to me – I’m being teased but in such a way that the stimulation is not enough to get me anywhere near getting off. With my hands bound, I couldn’t show DeeDee where to put the vibe exactly. MasterDoc took over the toy again, and I was nearly – nearly! – to orgasm but my knees gave out. They started doing this popping thing and I couldn’t hold myself up any more. I need to get in shape.

I was so frustrated at not really coming, but my body was exhausted. I sat and rested for a while and then MasterDoc decided to give me the first sybian ride of the evening. It was wonderful to finally come! I screamed as I came. MasterDoc kept me coming over and over and over again. He pushed me past what I thought I could handle. DeeDee spanked me a bit and then she pressed against me and could feel the vibrations through my body. MasterDoc told her she could come as well, and she came pressed into me – which made me come harder.

I was exhausted after. Yes, even more so than before. I lay down on the mat next to the sybian for a while. MasterDoc chatted with DeeDee while I lay there, and at one point he started using me as a foot rest. Kinky perv that I am, I thought that was hot. Sometimes I really, really get into being submissive. After I had enough energy to sit up, I sat on the mat by his feet and hugged his leg. I do enjoy being the worshipful sub sometimes.

MasterDoc gave other sybian rides, of course. One of Sofija’s “sisters” (in her leather family) held the young Southern woman as she rode for her first time. MasterDoc sat off the to the side, watching her reactions and manning the controls. Sofija sat nearby and I initiated a little flirting. We held hands for a brief few moments. I was bold and started gently touching her skin, but she mentioned that her Sir said he didn’t want anyone touching her that night without his permission. I respected that of course and figured that perhaps some other time…. (Yes, I felt too shy to go ask her Dom. I mean, the guy’s a Dom, lil’ ol’ me can be intimidated even though he’s always been nice.)

MasterDoc told me a little later that he had spoken to Sir M a while ago and asked permission for me to hook up with Sofija. (!) And I was interested enough and forward enough tell her this straight out next opportunity I got. She wanted to ask her Sir to confirm and I agreed wholeheartedly, saying I didn’t know if the permission applied that night or not. She apparently got in trouble for something when she went over to him, and she was busy watching her sisters the rest of the evening. (I don’t get the sense that she got in trouble over me. She wrote me an email the next day saying she hopes she gets to spend more time with me in the future. *happy dance*)

There were some hot scenes going on. While DeeDee recovered from her sybian ride (I helped by massaging her ass and inner thighs while she came.) I asked permission to wander off and I got to see one couple doing fire play. It was fascinating. Right next to them there was a suspension going on – something I’ve never experienced either. Sir M was giving a flogging to a lass who wiggled so sexily. I saw her later with another Dom and he flogged her front while she writhed sexily again. I made a point of telling her how hot it was to watch her on the way out. She looked like an average woman, someone who would not necessarily be aware of her allure. (She looked like a nice Jewish girl. Not someone you’d assume to be a perv. You know, like most of us pervs – normal-looking!) She seemed really appreciative that I mentioned she was hot to watch.

I enjoyed watching some fem Dommes – especially with masculine male subs. Sissy male subs don’t do it for me. (Nothing wrong with others’ kinks, it’s just one that doesn’t do it for me. The adult baby there didn’t do it for me either. But I have gradually come to see that some age play can be fun. I don’t feel the need to regress to infancy myself.) I thought about how men are expected to be dominant sexually in our culture and the relief a submissive man must feel when he hooks up with a dominant woman for the first time. He can be himself. He doesn’t have to be in charge. It’s a wonderful thing that kinksters can find each other and bring so much pleasure. Other parties I’ve been to have often been male Dom/female sub heavy, but this party had many fem Dommes, sub men, switchy people. We saw two guys play – something you don’t see often. Even hopelessly straight MasterDoc thought it was cool that a male couple would feel comfortable enough to play. He may not be turned on by it, but he’s supportive of people enjoying the sexuality that turns them on.

A Week in the Life of Nadia

I’m so behind on blogging! I’ve had a very busy week or so and it doesn’t seem to be letting up any time soon. This seems to be a new trend – insane busy-ness. As a result you will get a mish-mosh of things I got up to over the past several days.

MasterDoc recently bought (yes, we sometimes buy sex toys and not just enjoy the ones I get to review) some Zeus electrosex attachments from Extreme Restraints – the nipple “clamps” to target my poor sensitive nipples and the small torpedo plug to torment my ass. The plug didn’t get used although he did use the larger one we’ve had for a while in my vagina. We discovered however, that for me the electrosex isn’t so good for foreplay, but it’s divine once I’m aroused. The large torpedo in my cunt was uncomfortable because it’s so rigid and I wasn’t yet warmed up. The nipple clamps don’t particularly clamp, but they do zap your nipples. But worse than that, he thought to put them on my outer labia. That fucking hurt. Then he tried them on my inner labia. I think he needs to gag me if he ever plans on putting that toy near my cunt again. I screamed. He threatened to put it on my clit but thankfully he showed some mercy.

After all the torment (and yes, as much as I enjoy some pain it was indeed torment) he fucked me from behind. This was my present for being so patient with the electrosex. The fucking was really hot, and not at all painful like the electro gear. I was allowed to use the magic wand, which I love but it’s hard to hold up after a while (especially if you’re busy holding yourself up with your other arm).

I held out as long as I could but I had to beg to be allowed to come. I came and unfortunately my cunt pushed his cock out. But, ever the soul of ingenuity, he used a glass dildo on me for a while and kept me coming. Then he put his cock back in a few times. Alternating between the dildo and his cock was wonderful, but I certainly hope doing Kegels these days will help control the intense squeezing and ejection my cunt likes to do during orgasm. I squirted all over my hand, the bed and the floor. I was exhausted and sweaty after.

Somewhere in the past few days was some really hot sex – that I’ve now forgotten the details of. Yes, I know I’m quite fortunate to have enough fantastic sex that I can afford to forget some of it. I seem to remember prostate massage for MasterDoc. And fucking. Oh and I started sinking into depression on afternoon so MasterDoc caned me. Rather hard. I nearly didn’t make it through all 10 strokes! But my mood sure improved after that.

Another day, I was bound, face down over the hump of the Liberator scoop and made to come.  Yay! Bondage! He held the magic wand to my clit and let me hump it while my legs and wrists were attached to the scoop by cuffs. He left me bound there for a while while he went off to play with DeeDee. I was wiped out, but after a bit I became distracted by Forrest Gump playing on the television. Yes, I held my head up uncomfortably and got into the movie. I rather suspect MasterDoc was doing wonderful nasty things to DeeDee. He came out and released me after a bit, and I rested on the couch as I ended up dizzy and nauseous for a while – I guess having my bodacious boobs smashed against the scoop might have compressed my chest a bit too much.

During another interlude, he made DeeDee come while I got toys together. (And drove myself nearly crazy because I hadn’t been good and put my Lelo Gigi away last time – so I had to search high and low for it while listening to DeeDee come in the next room.) But I got my moment when MasterDoc langorously played with my cunt with his fingers, and he made me come with his hands. After recovering, DeeDee blew him while I kissed him and played with his chest. He asked for a condom and I put one on, then he surprised us a little by asking DeeDee if she wanted to get on for a ride. While she fucked him I played with his inner thighs and really added to the experience for him. It is so much fun to watch them while being participatory. My pillow princess days are over – I get really into making other people feel good.

After a break MasterDoc decided to fuck me too. Whoo hoo! He fucked me from behind on the mat in the living room. DeeDee played with his ass while he fucked me. I was so turned on that I thought I might come without permission but I could tell he was near coming. Despite my intense arousal I wanted him to come from fucking me – it doesn’t happen often – or at least have a chance to. Eventually he realized he wasn’t going to quite get there, so he told me to come. I did, muscles clamping down, squirting a whole lot over my hand holding the Gigi. I was an exhausted and happy camper. He went later to fuck DeeDee in her room while I got ready for bed.

So, uh, just a typical week in the life of Nadia.

Details of Tuesday’s Tease

Ok, so my last entry was a tease. Did you peek at the categories selected to get an idea of what we got up to?

Much of the evening is a blur. I remember feeling extremely subby (as I have been the past few days). And MasterDoc could arouse me with just gentle touches of his hands. There was lots of cuddling with my back to his front, and he reached around to molest my body. I could feel my breathing grow shallow, and I knew that at any time he could make me come just by telling me to do so. He did of course, and I had whole body spasms until he encouraged me to come down. DeeDee watched and both of them said it was really hot to see.

The dynamic between the three of us – MasterDoc, DeeDee, and me – is slowly evolving. Speaking to MasterDoc the other day he mentioned that had he found DeeDee first, then it would have been easier to put me in the situation where I’m sub to both of them, and she’s alpha sub. As it is, this dynamic seems to be gradually forming, not that I mind because I really am exclusively sub. Outside the bedroom DeeDee and I are fairly equal despite my technical “senority.”

MasterDoc fucked me on the bed doggy style with DeeDee right there fixing up some porn on her laptop. I got into the whole headspace of being his to use (and just minutes before I was craving use) and loved getting fucked. (Then again, when don’t I?) He made me come and squirt and I lay recovering after.

DeeDee made some sort of smartass remark (or a few) after she had just gotten MasterDoc some water with ice in it. Oh dear. He immediately responded with a piece of ice on her clit. This seemed uncomfortable at first, but soon she was approaching orgasm. I joined in and played with her tits because I thought that not only would MasterDoc want me to add to the scene, but that DeeDee would enjoy it too. (She did. She thanked me after.) MasterDoc made her come and I think I joked about how if that’s the result of a wisecrack then I will have to make more of them!

MasterDoc fucked me again, and created his own sexual position: The Motorcycle and Sidecar. He fucked me as I was on all fours while he reached over and fingered DeeDee who was laying on her back on the bed next to us. (Edited to correct DeeDee’s position. I didn’t look up til she was turned over, and I didn’t know that she was initially on her back.)  Fuck, it was so hot hearing her and I get more and more turned on. I thought it was just fantastic the way he was getting both his sluts to come at the same time – which is exactly what he did. (While DeeDee and I are lucky to have him, you gotta admit he’s a pretty lucky man too. How many guys out there fantasize about regular threesomes with two sexy, horny women? How many of you get them?)

MasterDoc needed to piss, but he had to keep putting off because I’d idly start massaging his body and he’d get a hard on. The next time I wasn’t doing anything but he was talking about some hot stuff and he got himself hard. He got me to admit that him pissing on me – at least just on my chest, not yet in my mouth – is pretty hot at this point. It’s something that I had to admit, but really hate to admit. I described to him and DeeDee that it’s hot because I don’t want it. I get turned on by fear. (DeeDee mentioned that she doesn’t.) It’s just one more type of masochism for me. When he mind fucks me and puts fear into me, I get this thrill that translates into a sort of arousal. I know ultimately I’m safe with him, but how far will he push me?

I was hoping MasterDoc was kidding when he said I was going into the bathroom with him, but he wasn’t. Yes, twice in three days he pissed on me. As I felt the warm piss running down my chest and body, I closed my eyes and was turned on by how very dirty, slutty and submissive it was to let him piss on me. He had said something before he started about having me lick it off my breasts, but thankfully he must have decided against that. I showered off after.

When I returned to the bedroom, DeeDee was massaging his ass. I sat close to him and played with his neck and chest and it was so fun to watch his eyes close and his head nod forward as he got lost in feeling good. Watching a partner get turned on is so hot.

MasterDoc had a phone call he needed to return, and DeeDee went off to watch the segment in Sex: How to Do It on prostate massage. I was hoping to get a snack, but he requested my presence on the bed massaging his back during his phone call. While my initial response was, “Darn, I’m thirsty. And I want a snack,” I quickly got into the idea of serving my Dom. I stroked his body while he talked, my presence somewhat incidental. He told Puppy, who he was talking to on the phone, that it was so relaxing him laying there and my massaging him during the phone call. (Puppy, for those who haven’t been reading long enough, is MasterDoc’s submissive playmate who loves puppy play. She lives across the country currently as she had been attending college out there until her graduation.) My hands started to get tired, but I figured I’d hold out as long as was reasonable before asking him politely if I could rest. His phone call ended before I got to that point, however, but I did rest my hands for a while because I knew that next I was supposed to show DeeDee what I’ve learned about prostate massage.

We worked together on massaging his ass, using lots of lube. I find it’s hard to get two pairs of hands in there at once. I gently and slowly worked my way in – explaining to DeeDee that going slow is vital. I slowly but firmly massage his anal sphincter before actually penetrating fully with my finger. This time I felt the “walnut” texture of the prostate gland. I explained while doing it that I was gently, slowly moving my finger in the “come hither” motion. (MasterDoc was on his back. So far this seems the easiest position for me to reach his prostate.) And that this sort of stroking of his prostate was preferable over any sort of thrusting of the finger.

I slept well that night, tired out from all the sex. I am so lucky.

I’ve been at my place the past couple of nights, and last night I had a dream that I wish I remembered in more detail: In it I had my collar on, naked and I brought the leash in to MasterDoc in the living room. I knelt on the floor in front of him, bowed my head, and held the leash for him in my outstretched hands. (I’ve seen a photo of a woman holding a cane out in this position, I’m sure that’s where it came from.) He clipped the leash on my collar and for the duration I was led around by the leash. I think there was something with me in bondage while he fucked DeeDee and I’m pretty sure there was a gag in there somewhere. Unfortunately details started to slip away soon after I woke, but it sounds just like the sort of thing my subconscious would dream up.