Monthly Archive for April, 2010

When His Pleasure Becomes Mine

Published on April 26, 2010 in bdsm, blow jobs, cunt, D/s, DeeDee, kink, masochism, nipple clamps, orgasm on command, sadism, sex, shio, squirting, submissive and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

I thought for sure the evening would be all about MasterDoc’s pleasure. In fact, he had told us that it was our jobs to entertain him. (To which I saucily stood on one foot, put my finger to my nose and pulled the other leg in and out to the side while singing that circus song. The one I can’t transliterate here. Hey, he wanted to be entertained! It resulted in a good laugh.) It started off with DeeDee and I on either side of him on the mat in the living room, while I demonstrated how to touch him around his thighs, butt, and genital area, to make him feel good. At first DeeDee thought she couldn’t learn it, but when she joined in she did just fine. Just pay attention to MasterDoc’s reactions and you soon learn what he likes. If anything, he’s taught me to be more observant of my partners to gauge what they are stimulated by.

He had DeeDee blow him. While she did this, he reached out to me and held me by my neck. Having him grip me in so delicate an area is a huge turn on for me these days. I wasn’t sure if he’d squeeze at all, but he does realize that it’s not breathplay per se that turns me on, it’s more the threat of it and a firm grip on my throat.

MasterDoc asked me if I wanted to get fucked. I stammered that I hadn’t thought tonight would be about me at all and so I didn’t put in the right menstrual cup for fucking. As I went to the bathroom to change cups, he had DeeDee assemble some toys.

Thankfully, she accidentally picked up Puppy’s choke chain rather than the clover clamps (which are joined by a similar chain). She did have another pair of clamps, however and MasterDoc demonstrated how to put them on, very slowly, watching the sub’s face the whole time. DeeDee did the other nipple and did just fine. The one MasterDoc had put on was a bit tighter. He tugged on the chain, watching my face while the pain affected me. He soon slid his hand between my pussy lips and massaged. I went off into that special place where all you’re aware of is the increasing arousal of your body. It felt like my pulse sped up. Little flashes of nerve impulses would distract me. I was lost in reverie. MasterDoc gave me the word, and my body convulsed involuntarily as it tends to do when he tells me to come. After the long orgasm, they commented on how beautiful I look while coming, which is a wonderful thing to tell a woman.

MasterDoc got back on track with the idea of fucking me. He had me get on hands and knees on the mat on the floor. He fucked me from behind and my top half ended up pushed into the mat. As I slid into subspace I found myself thinking the kind of thing I’d roll my eyes at if I read it on Fetlife or somewhere – I found myself thinking that I was so pleased and honored that I was the hole he chose to use when he wanted to fuck. Oh yes, I was deep into being sub. While it felt amazing to be fucked, in my mind my pleasure wasn’t the point. I certainly came when he told me to, and I fell forward off the mat onto the floor during orgasm, and I somehow thought it fitting for a sub to have her face pressed into the rug as she comes. But I was more hopeful that using me like that pleased him. I know, that’s the sort of thing that I roll my eyes at when others say it, but damn, subspace is another planet.

I squirted a whole lot as I came – on the mat thankfully.

MasterDoc sent me to bed after that. I had work the next morning, but I left he and DeeDee on the mat in the living room. Too bad neither of them blogs – you will never know what they got up to after I went to sleep.

Review: Lelo Gigi from Babeland

Published on April 25, 2010 in reviews, sex toys and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

Ever since I discovered Lelo toys in 2008, I have lusted after the Gigi, their g-spot vibrator. I was given the choice of what to review direct from the company way back then for that first review, and I went back and forth between the Nea and the Gigi. I ultimately took the Nea.

Now, I haven’t regretted getting the Nea as I love it and still use it regularly. It’s a great little clitoral vibe – not to mention pretty like all Lelo products. I was pleased to get the Lelo Ella to review a while back because it’s the non-vibrating version of the Gigi, and I loved that too. The Liv, which I also reviewed is similar in size to the Gigi, but it doesn’t have the g-spot specific shape. Despite all the Lelo wonderfulness I had gotten my hot little hands on, I still pined away for the Gigi. And yes, I could have splurged and purchased it, but as a toy reviewer I was convinced that someday… someday I might manage to get it to review.

And praise the Gods of Sex Toys, I won a Gigi when Babeland raffled off five to reviewers. Now, was it worth the wait? Oh hell yes. I love the design as it provides a firm, round surface to press against your g-spot. The silicone is velvety, not to mention you can sterilize it by wiping down with a 10% bleach solution. It’s angled perfectly, for me anyway, to hit that special spot. I found the controls easier to figure out than the Nea. (The Nea takes a bit of playing with before I manage to turn it on each time. Just when I think I’ve figured it out it doesn’t work like I think it will.) There’s a variety of vibration patterns and varying intensity of vibration. Unlike battery powered vibes (like all Lelo vibrators the Gigi is rechargeable) it really packs enough of a punch to get me off. (And I like intense vibes like the Hitachi Magic Wand, however I tend to prefer it on its low setting – so those of you who like weapons-grade sex toys might not be able to fully come from the Gigi. But then again, you might. I’m kinda on the edge of the weapons-grade sex toy fandom. I like a good strong vibration.) The Gigi not only feels lovely inside me, against my g-spot, it also feels great on my clit. The Gigi has turned out to be all that I had hoped it to be. Not all sex toys live up to the hype or your fantasies about them, but the Gigi, like all other Lelo products, came through for me. Highly recommended.

___________________________________________

Thank you to Babeland for sending this toy for review. This toy was received for free for review purposes and I was expected to give my honest assessment.

Ass Fucked Slut

Published on April 25, 2010 in anal, bdsm, blow jobs, cunt, D/s, depression, embarrassment, humiliation play, kink, masochism, masturbation, orgasm denial, orgasm on command, sadism, sex, sex toys, shio, slut, squirting, Uncategorized and wartenburg wheel. 0 Comments

The terrible mood swings went on up through last night. The “crimson tide” has come in so today I’m feeling much more stable. Except for the time when I got hypoglycemic. Oh well, there’s always something.

I got to spend some special alone time with MasterDoc last night. As we sat on the sofa, he started in on some sort of mind fuck. The problem is I can’t recall today what it was – some sort of threat of something that is scary but perhaps also erotic, or at least him making me do it is erotic in and of itself. I wish I could remember the specifics but all I remember ultimately is getting hot and melting into submissiveness just from his words.

He had me set up the bedroom for our interlude. As usual the Fascinator throe was put down on the bed. Lube, condoms, a butt toy and a vibe were made handy. I added the Wartenburg wheel. I brought his laptop in and set it up on the bed with some porn on it.

He told me to finish watching the tv show I had been watching, and when the last fifteen minutes were up I went into the bedroom. He told me to take the lube, reach back and lube up my ass. As I did this, hands working behind me, standing at the foot of the bed, he watched me and commented that it was hot thinking about exactly what I was doing. I felt embarrassment and looked down. When I was done, he sent me to wash my hands of the extra lube.

He had me get on hands and knees as soon as I returned, and he fucked my ass without any physical foreplay. It’s funny because sometimes I need a good warm up, but last night was so hot. I loved that he just shoved his cock inside my lubed up ass and fucked the hell out of me. The idea that I was his slut, his dirty whore who was enjoying him fucking me up the ass, turned me on so much. I’m pretty sure I muttered, “I love being your slut!” at one point. I was turned on by the idea of him using my body for his own pleasure. He fucked me long and hard. I was moaning and on the verge of orgasm for ages. Even though his cock was in my ass I could feel the sensations in my cunt. He ran the Wartenburg wheel over my ass and back, pressing the points into my ass. He grabbed my hips, and was generally rough with me. I held out as long as I could before begging for permission to come. He let me come and he continued to fuck me as I shuddered and screamed. (I feel bad for his neighbors. We really need to use gags more.) He wrung every last orgasm out of my body. His cock has been extra hard for extra long recently (I will perhaps someday explain why) and my clenching pelvic muscles aren’t such a formidable force against his cock these days. I do still push his cock out involuntarily sometimes, but it doesn’t happen as quickly or easily as before.

We took a break and I was exhausted from the phenomenal ass fucking. Unfortunately my hormones were still wreaking havoc on me and I hit a mood swing and started crying. Of course MasterDoc was a bit bewildered that after such great sex and orgasms I could feel depressed, but it was really just down to some sort of biochemical mood swing.

We rested for a bit and snacked on sorbet and fruit salad. My mood was back up again and I tried to eat slowly, savoring the feeling of the creamy sorbet on my tongue. At some point he said he needed to pee, but just a little bit, and he considered pissing in my mouth right there on the bed, and making me swallow it down. I cringed and curled up, putting my head down, hoping so hard that he was just fucking with me. This time he was.

I was hoping we’d fuck more, and it seemed a bit iffy at one point. Because of my moodiness I perceived that since DeeDee moved in with him he gives me much shorter and less involved scenes. We talked about it though, and it’s probably a bit of my mis-perception, and a bit of just the usual ebb and flow (that would have happened regardless of DeeDee living here). He says he’ll keep an eye on things in the future, but two weeks is a really short period of time to interpret things as changing long term. I do worry that with two women around so much now that getting as much sex from him might be difficult.

We cuddled a bit, and he had me suck his cock after I had had enough cuddles. I got really into it and he seemed just huge last night and very hard. He picked up the magic wand and held it to my clit while I sucked. I was soon humping the wand as best I could and he had me put a condom on him and get on top. I was so horny and turned on that I pushed through a little physical fatigue to ride him a good long time. He thrust up into me, making me sigh and gasp as he did. He grabbed parts of my body to enhance the experience – gentle nipple pinching, massaging my hip joints. He got me really worked up until I came, and came, and came. I squirted all over him, and unfortunately the throe had shifted through the evening and I squirted a bit on the bed as well. His cock stayed hard for a long time and I kept coming. As I came he slapped my ass at one point but damn, somehow it hurt too much and distracted me. I had to beg him to stop spanking me. My ass stung for a few moments afterward.

He made me come again and this time my vagina of steel pushed his cock out. By this time his balls were soaked in my come, and I was exhausted, but very, very happy.

Despite the mood swings I was still dealing with, we had a fantastic evening together.

MasterDoc’s PMDD Cure

Published on April 21, 2010 in anal, bdsm, D/s, depression, humiliation play, kink, masochism, nipple clamps, orgasm on command, sex, sex toys, shio, squirting, Uncategorized and wartenburg wheel. 1 Comment

I’ve spent the past two evenings with MasterDoc, and the timing couldn’t have been more perfect. Late Monday afternoon at work my mood dropped considerably and my premenstrual bout of depression had begun.

I found myself withdrawn when I met up with DeeDee and MD at his place. The three of us were supposed to hang out together that night, whereas Tuesday night was to be my night alone with him. I felt terrific guilt at being so down and feeling unstable. I had fears that DeeDee might think I was malingering to get attention. And while I did need attention, it wasn’t from faking but from a genuine mood issue.

But both DeeDee and MasterDoc were really kind that night. They didn’t push me to do my usual things (DeeDee cooks, I clean up lately) and MasterDoc gave me time alone. We tried out my new Gigi (the vibrator I have lusted after for over a year!) that I won from Babeland. I will review it shortly. I loved the new toy and MasterDoc made me come hard over and over. He wrung every possible orgasm out of my body. But while I felt amazing immediately after, my depression still lurked and I found myself crying out of frustration and sadness. I needed cuddles as much as I needed orgasms.

Last night, I was handling myself a little better although I still felt depressed. While cuddling on the couch, MasterDoc had a revelation – while orgasms and beatings do help my mood, it’s more likely that I need the intimacy when I’m feeling down. I think he’s on to something there.

When it came time for sex, he had me set up the electrosex box, the usual items (condoms, lube), my new Gigi and the plastic clips from the kitchen (small plastic clothespins used to keep bags closed). I took the liberty of adding the wartenburg wheel. I tried out the clothespins on my nipples when I went to the kitchen to get them. My nipples are more sensitive what with my period coming any day now, and I was pretty terrified of him using them on me.

Later in the evening he did use them, first to clip the skin of my upper breasts. This hurt, but I was sufficiently in subspace by that time that it felt amazing for him to hurt me. I wanted him to hurt me. I wanted to suffer by his hand. He ultimately decided to progress to putting them on my nipples, and to my surprise I enjoyed the pain. I have a light bruise on my right breast, I’m not sure if it’s from the clothespins or if he bit me at some point.

My recollections are a bit hazy. I can recall what we did, but not in what order things happened. He fucked me from behind, and the whole time I fantasized about him fucking me up the ass. His cock stayed rock hard even when I came and this was just amazing to feel – his cock still hard, still inside me. I went all feral and pushed myself back onto him while stroking my swollen and wet pussy. As I came, my hand became covered in my juices. I squirted a hell of a lot last night.

I collapsed when he told me to, and a short while later I shared my fantasy of him fucking my ass. Much to my happiness, he decided to do that. He had me use the Gigi on my clit first and then wanted me to put it inside of my vagina – not only for my own pleasure, but he wanted me to rub the vibration against the membrane between my vagina and rectum so he could feel it on his cock. I was totally into being fucked up the ass, but unfortunately trying to get the vibe in my pussy from that angle was hopeless. That kinda drew things to a close. But while he was fucking me, I loved how he dug his fingers into my ass, or stroked my back, or pulled my hair. I nearly forgot – he also ran the wartenburg wheel over me.

I felt much better after all that. And of course I’m not the only one who got to come. MasterDoc came on my face – not in my mouth. My chin and lips were glazed with his come, which I left there until he told me I could clean it off. (Guys don’t necessarily appreciate a woman going, “Eww!” and wiping off their come at the first possible second.) I slept well last night and the good feelings lingered on through much of today. Hormones fucked with me some more this afternoon, but I’m just eagerly waiting on my period at this point.

One last tidbit, after fucking my ass, he made me lick around the base of his cock to make sure it would be clean in case he fucked my pussy again. I somehow managed to desensitize myself to the ick factor of ass stuff being on his cock. I suppose it was easier to handle than actual ass-to-mouth.

Stalkers

Published on April 18, 2010 in anger, anxiety, blogs and Uncategorized. 6 Comments

Addendum: I thought I had written about this sort of behavior before – from January, Being Promiscuous Doesn’t Necessarily Mean I Will Fuck You.

Most of the people I’ve interacted with online since starting this blog have been wonderful. Up until the other day I had a chat widget on here that enabled me to chat with readers whenever I was logged into my Digsby aggregator. Every so often someone would say hello and it was pleasant to talk to people, answer sexuality questions and receive compliments. However, someone has ruined this for the rest of you now.

A blog reader (whose IP I have logged, I know you’re in New Jersey) has been going back and forth between my blog and Coy Pink’s for the past few days. He tries to talk to us via our pingbox/chat widget and if one doesn’t respond he quickly goes to the other. He is demanding in his tone and I got sick of his badgering me (not to mention inappropriate behavior when chatting with me) so I deleted the chat widget.

The chat started off friendly enough with some compliments. I always try to be gracious when someone contacts me because I really have no reason not to be. However, even when I said that I didn’t want to talk right then because I wanted to work on a blog entry, he kept messaging me a few more times because I still appeared online. By the time I made my excuses and finished the conversation (which I did mainly so I could blog in peace and quiet) he had stepped over a line by telling me that he was picturing fucking me from behind.

Seriously, this shit is creepy. I am a woman, a sexual assault/rape survivor and I live in a culture where rape is rampant. I don’t want some completely anonymous guy who I have no information about telling me what he “wants” to do to me. It’s nice to want, buddy, but seriously, I don’t want to hear it. However, being nice to people and going down the path of least resistance is my usual modus operandi so I simply got the conversation to end. Also, he started talking about wanting to play with me and how he’s into dominance. I made it clear that MasterDoc is the person to talk to since who I do bdsm play with is his choice.

Later that evening, he contacted me again. I had said I might be available to chat after a certain time so it was to be expected. Coy Pink and I had compared notes by this time (he mentioned that he had talked to her). This time, he started in right away trying to dominate me. It was nearing bedtime, so I had even less patience for that shit than usual. I told him straight out that I don’t appreciate someone who isn’t MasterDoc trying to tell me what to do. He apologized, but tried the same shit a short while later. I was tired and in no mood to talk, so the conversation ended. (But not until he had said that he was just seeing if we were on the same wavelength – yes this dude tried to frame his attempt at domming me as a “test.” I call bullshit.) However, Coy Pink saw him pop up on her site and try to talk to her. Apparently he spent a good amount of time going back and forth between her blog and mine. This stalker behavior is fucking creepy. And yes, it is stalker behavior. He sent me more instant messages apologizing for his behavior earlier.

I was away from my digsby for all of Friday, but as soon as I logged in on Saturday – yes, AS SOON AS I LOGGED IN – he messaged me. And he continued to message me every few minutes even though I didn’t respond. He had already messaged Coy Pink the second she logged on on Friday and Saturday. Coy has had more patience than I when it came to ignoring him or tersely replying to his messages. I have had no patience for it. I should not feel like I’m being stalked when I log in online. So I deleted my chat widget. Of course, today he messaged Coy – AS SOON AS SHE LOGGED IN – and asked why the widget was gone on my site.

It’s arguable that I should have told him to fuck off directly, but I’m a very non-confrontational person. However, creepy stalker guy from NJ? Fuck off. Do not contact me ever again. Ever. Your behavior is NOT acceptable and I want nothing to do with you. Also stop contacting Coy Pink. Take the hint, it is not okay to contact us.

Unfortunately, female sex bloggers sometimes have to deal with all sorts of creepy and douchey behavior from men. Dangerous Lilly had an incident on a dating site a last year. Other bloggers have dealt with all manner of assholery. I thought it might be useful to give men guidelines for contacting their favorite sex bloggers:

1. Be respectful. I am a human being and deserving of respect. My being sexually free does not mean you can accost me with sex talk. I am an educated, intelligent, professional woman. I am only a slut for MasterDoc.

2. You DO NOT KNOW ME. It may feel like that if you’ve read for a while, but only a tiny piece of my life and who I am appears on this blog.

3. I DO NOT KNOW YOU. I don’t have the advantage of reading a blog filled with your innermost thoughts and sexy adventures. I know absolutely nothing about you. Approaching me to see if I’d consider playing with you is not appropriate. Let me know who you are, let me get to know you, then approach the subject – this does not mean approaching the subject the same night or even same week you first contacted me.

4. If I turn you down, or if I ignore your messages, this is my right. I do not owe you a response. Do not keep contacting me multiple times a day. I do not owe you sex. I do not even owe you sexy talk when you want to wank. I’m glad that people enjoy my blog and the few pictures I put up, but I really don’t want to hear anything more explicit than, “Your stories/pictures are hot. Thank you for sharing them.”

5. Stalking my blog or any other blog is creepy and inappropriate. And likely to get your IP address turned over to the police.

6. I have plenty of friends, so don’t be surprised if I don’t make the effort to pursue a friendship with you. Even if you seem nice I probably don’t have the time or inclination right now.

If this sounds bitchy it’s because I feel the need to be firm and direct with the creepazoids of the internet. As I said earlier, most people I’ve heard from have been wonderful. People who are nice and respectful may have some hope of meeting and hanging out with me. People who go on about fucking me when I know nothing about them will get blocked. It’s not that I’m all that but being a sexually open woman does tend to attract people. Just because I write about my sex life in detail does not mean I will fuck anyone. Just because I’m slutty doesn’t mean I will meet you.

Here’s the stalker’s history on my blog today:

18th April 2010	10:34:46 AM	Page View	www.coypink.com/ www.diaryofakinkylibrarian.com/
18th April 2010	10:37:40 AM	Exit Link	http://twitter.com/nadiawest/statuses/12375117378
18th April 2010	01:03:41 PM	Page View	www.coypink.com/ www.diaryofakinkylibrarian.com/
18th April 2010	01:04:31 PM	Exit Link	http://twitter.com/nadiawest/statuses/12400319285
18th April 2010	01:05:49 PM	Page View	www.coypink.com/ www.diaryofakinkylibrarian.com/
18th April 2010	01:09:37 PM	Page View	www.diaryofakinkylibrarian.com/ www.diaryofakinkylibrarian.com/index.php/elsewhere/
18th April 2010	01:10:31 PM	Exit Link	http://twitter.com/nadiawest
18th April 2010	01:10:46 PM	Page View	www.diaryofakinkylibrarian.com/ www.diaryofakinkylibrarian.com/index.php/elsewhere/
18th April 2010	01:10:48 PM	Page View	www.coypink.com/ www.diaryofakinkylibrarian.com/
18th April 2010	01:29:38 PM	Page View	www.coypink.com/ www.diaryofakinkylibrarian.com/
18th April 2010	01:43:50 PM	Page View	www.coypink.com/ www.diaryofakinkylibrarian.com/
18th April 2010	01:45:09 PM	Page View	www.coypink.com/ www.diaryofakinkylibrarian.com/
18th April 2010	01:45:15 PM	Exit Link	http://www.sexbloggercalendar.com/
18th April 2010	01:48:33 PM	Page View	www.coypink.com/ www.diaryofakinkylibrarian.com/
18th April 2010	01:50:14 PM	Page View	www.diaryofakinkylibrarian.com/ www.diaryofakinkylibrarian.com/index.php/category/photos/
18th April 2010	01:50:30 PM	Page View	www.coypink.com/ www.diaryofakinkylibrarian.com/
18th April 2010	03:03:11 PM	Page View	www.coypink.com/ www.diaryofakinkylibrarian.com/
18th April 2010	03:09:25 PM	Page View	www.coypink.com/ www.diaryofakinkylibrarian.com/
18th April 2010	03:12:46 PM	Page View	www.coypink.com/ www.diaryofakinkylibrarian.com/
18th April 2010	03:30:26 PM	Page View	dangerouslilly.com/ www.diaryofakinkylibrarian.com/

The Man with the Sybian

Published on April 17, 2010 in bdsm, blow jobs, caning, D/s, DeeDee, depression, emotions, exhibitionism, flogging, kink, masochism, masturbation, orgasm on command, sex parties, sex toys, shio, spanking, squirting and Uncategorized. 0 Comments

Last night I went out to a party with MasterDoc and DeeDee. She’s now staying with MasterDoc until she gets herself settled in New York, so we’ll get to hang out more often.

I was feeling blue and moody, thanks to the usual premenstrual issues, but I was at least able to control my feelings this time, and realize that they were hormonal rather than real issues. It was wonderful that DeeDee noticed I was out of sorts and she asked what she could do or not to that evening to help – this is why we’re friends. Just hearing that helped de-grumpify me a little bit.

We went out in the pouring rain because MasterDoc was bringing the sybian to this party, so he had an obligation to show up. I found early in the evening that I needed cuddles more than anything else, and DeeDee and I sat on either side of him on a sofa for a while after we arrived at the party. The cuddles definitely helped me. I was fortunate since MasterDoc and DeeDee had had sexual and bdsm fun in the afternoon, so he focused on me a little more which I really needed last night.

The party started really slowly. It seemed the singletons showed up early so no one was playing. I felt like we were beyond the kink level of the attendees, but later when things started picking up and more couples arrived, I found that while we were decidedly more sexual than most, the others there were pretty damn kinky. I went down on MasterDoc for a while (despite the slight discomfort from bending over in my waist cincher) and DeeDee took a turn after.

MasterDoc knows that spanking, coupled with orgasms, usually helps my mood a great deal. So he had me kneel on the sofa, facing the back and take my pants down. He spanked and flogged me for a while and it helped my asocial mood to be able to close my eyes and just focus on the beating. He soon had DeeDee kneel on the sofa next to me, and he took turns flogging, spanking and caning us both. It was strange to hear two blows but not feel anything (when he hit DeeDee) and then suddenly the next two blows hit my ass. He gave us vibes to play with and made us work ourselves up. It’s funny because both DeeDee and I felt kinda like it was somehow not okay to be so sexual when no one else was doing anything. But still, regardless of anxiety, MasterDoc’s voice telling us to come made us come at once. I was afraid to squirt on my pants that were down around my knees, so I held back a little, but I did come. The orgasms were kinda like skipping stones across a pond – not deep but repetitive.

MasterDoc gave me the first sybian ride of the evening, and the orgasms did me a world of good. If you ever get a chance to watch a woman on a sybian, please do. It is amazing how hard a woman can come – and now much! – when riding that amazing vibrator. My orgasms were insane – I kept coming over and over. Grabbing blindly at MasterDoc and coming uncontrollably. I squirted a couple of times and had to clean up afterwards. He kept pushing me until I was too exhausted to come any more. I lay down on the couch after and was happy when I could rest my head on MasterDoc’s lap. MasterDoc’s pms cure had worked again!

DeeDee is exploring her switchiness and she got to talking to a submissive man at the party. He seemed nice. Not entirely her type but at least he put service before his own kinky desires – quite refreshing compared to the guys DeeDee has met on collar me. He gave DeeDee a foot rub, and she kindly got him to give me one after. Ah it was wonderful. I may not be at all dominant, but I do appreciate a good foot rub. He did it as long as either of us wanted him to. He also bought DeeDee a soda when she asked, and later he helped her out of her panties when she went to ride the sybian and he held them during her ride – I’m sure that was an exciting bit of the night for him.

MasterDoc got another taker for the sybian and he gave a ride to another lady while her man held her up, and held her arms behind her back (oooh, restraint during intense orgasms! Me want!). DeeDee and I sat with the submissive man and discussed the progression that goes on during a sybian ride. It starts of seeming like nothing much, soon the woman is bucking her hips and riding the machine. Then it keeps intensifying and after a variable period of time she comes. Screaming orgasms. It may back off a little – partly because the body needs a break and partly because MasterDoc will turn down the vibrations a bit, but when he turns them back up another amazing orgasm is wrenched from her body. It is amazing and hot to watch. I think it’s even more so when you’ve been on a sybian yourself and you know the stages and how it feels.

The party host had a lady of his get a ride and didn’t let her come. Meanie! DeeDee and I were appalled and so thankful that MasterDoc isn’t into prolonged orgasm denial. Neither of us would be able to handle it. I’m not saying it’s a bad thing to do, just not something that makes any sense whatsoever for me.

DeeDee wanted a sybian ride, so when MasterDoc looked around for more victims, er, volunteers I pointed to DeeDee to get his attention. Like I said earlier, the sub guy held her panties and while he fiddled with them a little he didn’t do anything creepy with them. It’s a shame he’s not more DeeDee’s type since he was quite nice, but I can see that a relationship wouldn’t really work with them. They’re not on the same page otherwise. DeeDee is really smart and educated, and she needs a man who can stimulate her intellectually.

MasterDoc hadn’t slept well the night before, and he decided to lay down on the couch and take a nap. He looked so cute sleeping there. There are times when you can still see the little boy inside the man and it’s incredibly endearing. DeeDee and I talked while MasterDoc napped.

Leaving was difficult since the party host wanted the sybian to stay around as long as possible, but I had worked that day and was pretty damn tired by 2 a.m. We were all ready to go home so we managed to say our goodbyes. The submissive guy happily carried the sybian out for us while MasterDoc pulled the car around.

I was in a much better mood after last night, and today, while I’m still feeling moody, I feel in relative control over myself. This is a good thing. MasterDoc had to go out in the morning for a while, and DeeDee and I just talked and talked for a few hours. As I tweeted at that time, life is good.

Electrosex Part Two

Published on April 13, 2010 in bdsm, D/s, dom, electrosex/tens unit, kink, masochism, orgasm on command, sadism, sex, sex toys and Uncategorized. 2 Comments

After having such a good time with the Zeus Electrosex Box recently, MasterDoc ordered the torpedo attachment, which enables you to zap the inside of a vagina. (Or ass if you’re so inclined although the one we got is kinda big for that. Plus this toy is not really sterilizable, so don’t swap locations or partners with it.) MasterDoc started off with the electrodes again however, and he had me place them on either side of my clit myself – having me place painful things on myself is an idea he got from a porn we watched recently where the woman put clothespins on her tits before going to see her Dominants.

He toyed with the electric current, and without much stimulation at all, he told me to come and I did. That night I was to come a few more times with just the slightest bit of stimulation. He said to me that night, “You know we’re very close to making you come on command.” Indeed we are. He slapped my clit a bit with the electricity flowing through my clit and made me come again. The third time, he wasn’t really doing anything but he gave me a firm look right in the eyes and told me to come. My body spasms involuntarily when he tells me to come. I keep being amazed by how easily he can make me come on command these days.

MasterDoc has lamented getting old and someday not having his cock work, but I pointed out that the way things are going he won’t have to lift a finger to make me come and be satisfied. It’s amazing what a strong sex organ the brain is. Granted, this took over two and a half years of conditioning to reach, so don’t expect this sort of thing to happen overnight.

The fourth time I came, he fingered me and the stroking of my g-spot while being zapped through the clit was divine. Finally, it was time to use the torpedo attachment. He lubed it up well, although I was quite wet by this time. The torpedo is pretty rigid so it’s not the sort of thing to just shove in without lube or warm up. The feeling of the electricity from the torpedo insert was quite different than the feeling from the electrode attachments. It was like it stimulated and made my vaginal muscles contract rather than feeling like a zap. Orgasm from this was pretty damn easy.

As hot as all this was, and as satisfied as I was at having had five massive orgasms (or rather, sets of orgasms), we still hadn’t fucked and it had been a full week since we had. He had me get on top and I rode his cock fiercely. His cock has been dealing with my vagina of steel better lately (and perhaps I’m not contracting quite as hard during orgasm? I don’t know.) and it felt wonderful to have his big hard cock inside me as I came.
It was getting late, and I was getting tired, but MasterDoc hadn’t come yet. He chose some porn and I played with his ass as he stroked his cock. He said sometime recently that he needs to have me teach DeeDee what to do with his ass. I suppose that’s the advantage at being someone’s submissive longer – you’ve gotten things down that the other sub is just starting to learn. In this vein, I’ve started a wiki on taking care of/serving MasterDoc. DeeDee and I had discussed a butler’s book, but the wiki seems more practical and easy to organize. (And we all know how librarians like organized information!) It’s technically public (had to be to be free) so perhaps some day I’ll share the url. To this, MasterDoc said, “Yes, so they can see how easy it is to take care of me!” I could not suppress a smile. He can be quite particular about some things, but he’s right when he points out that he’s not a Dom who demands perfection – and that’s one of the many things that makes him the right Dom for me. He’s not heavy on protocol, he won’t punish me for stupid things or things out of my control, and he’s just so damn cuddly for a sadistic bastard.

Beautiful Bloggers

Published on April 12, 2010 in blogs, meme and Uncategorized. 1 Comment

Aww! Kaya over at Under His Hand put me on her list of “beautiful bloggers.” Just when you think you’re totally not on the radar of someone you read, they go and surprise you like this. Granted, this is a meme more than an actual “award” but I will gratefully take recognition and link love from any other respected blogger.
Apparently the original shtick of the award is to name 3 bloggers for the award, and then list 7 things about yourself that your readers don’t know. Hmm. Kaya did things her way and I can’t help but think I’m going to do that too.

Some beautiful bloggers you should know about (more in my sidebar as well!):

So there’s 7 bloggers…. How about 3 things you don’t know about me?

1. I didn’t come out to myself as bi until I was around 27 or so. Oh sure I had fantasized about women, had crushes on women and masturbated to pictures of sexy women, but never had I truly admitted to myself my bisexuality until then.

2. My coming out to myself occurred the first time I took ecstasy. Haven’t taken it in many years now so I suppose no new revelations will come from that influence.

3. I lost my virginity on my 18th birthday with my first boyfriend who I had been seeing for six months at that point. Never again would I date someone anywhere near that long before fucking them.

The Lesbian Sheep Dance

Published on April 11, 2010 in attraction, bisexuality, blogs, lesbian, Uncategorized and vacation. 7 Comments

So as I’ve quite openly mentioned on my twitter feed, I just visited Seattle for a few days. I’d never been to the Pacific Northwest before. I always had the impression I’d like it and I really enjoyed my short time there. Seattle is clean, the people are polite and it’s just generally a nice place to be. The weather was changeable and I’ve said it reminds me of weather in England. However, I’m told that the weather the past few days has been more changeable than usual.

I consumed a lot of coffee because it seems like the thing to do out there and it helped me deal with jet lag. I’m going to have a hard time getting back on New York time tonight. I stayed with my friend Liz, who used to be MasterDoc’s roomate. It’s been great seeing her again, and she also has a positively adorable, sweet dog. Seriously, I think I’d like to come out just to visit the dog. She and her husband were great hosts and I’m thankful to have them to stay with – not only for the companionship and visiting but also because I saved a shit ton of money not staying in a hotel.

I got to meet fellow blogger Coy Pink, who was a big part of my decision to visit Seattle. We’ve been friendly online for a while and she just seemed so nice (and hot – have you seen her pictures?) She also offered that her husband Alec, a photographer, could take pictures of me – sexy pics for the blog that also have the advantage of being photographed by someone who really knows the art of photography – not just me and my friends and a point and shoot camera which is my usual.

On Thursday Coy Pink and her daughters showed me around the city a bit. Her daughters are adorable and very bright. That night she and I had dinner together, and we could finally talk about grown up, sex blogger things. I spent Friday exploring the city alone, and in the afternoon I met up with Twisted Monk briefly for coffee and to see his rope factory. (It’s small, smaller than you would envision for a company that’s noted in the kink community.) While I had met him before, we hadn’t really had time to chat and get to know each other. It was a pleasure to hang out with him. He talked a little about how he lost a lot of his life (family, etc.) when outed as kinky, and he didn’t intend to become a bondage rope manufacturer. That said, he seems fairly happy with what he does. But I always hate hearing these cautionary tales of kinksters who had their lives wrecked when the wrong people found out about their personal life. Where’s the vaunted American ideal of “freedom”? If someone wants to be a crazy creationist christian fundamentalist, I don’t think they should be harassed for their beliefs (as long as they don’t try to impose them on others) – so why the hell can’t non-kinky people just accept that some of us are kinky? American puritanism drives me bonkers.

Friday night I drove out to see Coy Pink in her suburban home. I had dinner with her family and made friends with her older daughter. Since my life is so different, not having kids, a house or a husband of my own, I felt a bit of envy at her domestic happiness and stability. I think we all want what we don’t have. I’m fairly happy with my life but you sometimes ask yourself, “What if I had done things differently?” Although when I ask myself that, I remind myself that there’s been no boyfriend in the past who I wanted to settle down and have kids with. Not really. I thought I did with the first boyfriend but I’m lucky to have gotten out of that relationship before marriage could happen.

Once the girls were in bed, we went downstairs to Alec’s (Coy Pink’s husband) photo studio. I can’t wait to see the pictures, Coy Pink has a couple of her and I up on her blog. There were photos taken including my face, for my own personal use/enjoyment, and faceless shots that I hope to use here. It’s funny how I felt like I should be modest somehow in front of them, but then I realized this was some sort of strange false modesty and I should just enjoy taking half naked photos.

Now, did I mention before that I think Coy Pink is hot? Yes, she is. And as usual I’m an idiot who did the lesbian sheep dance, which I always manage to do. I suppose I should tell you all what the lesbian sheep dance is….

There’s been a lot of research into homosexual sheep, because there’s many male homosexual sheep and it’s an issue for sheep breeders. They can’t get the gay sheep to mate with the women sheep of course. Now in the process of this research they noticed they didn’t come across any lesbian sheep. Do they not exist?

Eventually the researchers realized something – when female sheep want to signal readiness and interest in sex, they stand very, very still. And if you have two female sheep interested in sex with each other? They will both stand very, very still. And of course then nothing happens. This is what happens with me (and other women) when dating women. We both hope the other will make the first move, and ultimately nothing happens because we both stand around waiting for the other one to make the first move.

My friend V. created the phrase “lesbian sheep dance” to describe this state of excessive passivity (and YES, I know that this issue is NOT unique to lesbians) and I am the self-declared queen of it. Coy is awfully cute and sexy, making out with her (or more) would have been fantastic. But I felt awkward trying to be flirty with her husband around, and of course doubted that she had any interest in me in that way. I tweeted about being the queen of the lesbian sheep dance after I had told her they story of the term that night. She replied, “Well, if you’re the queen of the dance, I’m the princess. ” Oh my. I was determined to hit on her Saturday night (my final night in town) but we were all out in a group – myself, Coy, her husband Alec, Butchtastic Kyle, Roxy, Scarlet Lotus and Onyx. I had met Kyle and Roxy briefly at the NYC Sex Blogger Calendar party in November, but hadn’t met Scarlet and Onyx. I have to say I like them even more in person than online. We ate, drank and made merry – including a trip to a sex store afterward. We ate next door to the Seattle Babeland, but they were closed by the time we finished with dinner. Down the street there was another store though and we all went and browsed. Onyx found some wonderful t-shirts that say things like, “I like to get drunk and fuck people.” or “I cleaned out my ass for this?” There were humongous dildoes and butt plugs. Coy found some sexy clothing on sale. Hopefully these articles will appear in future photos her husband takes of her.

Hanging out in a sex shop with a bunch of perverts who blog about sex was fantastically fun. I only wish I could do it again sometime soon. It’s frustrating when you find people who you enjoy spending time with but they live on the other side of the country (especially when you live in such a large country as the United States).

So I’m afraid I don’t have any hot sex stories to share with you. The night before I left MasterDoc did make me come by simply sucking on my finger – very hot but the rest of the night is now a faded memory.

Sluts, Squirts and Swing Clubs

Published on April 6, 2010 in analingus, bdsm, blow jobs, cunt, D/s, embarrassment, exhibitionism, humiliation play, kink, masturbation, orgasm denial, orgasm on command, sex, sex parties, sex toys, shio, slut, squirting, submissive, swinging and Uncategorized. 1 Comment

We took advantage of my being on vacation and went out to the swing club last night. MasterDoc’s back is still bothering him but it’s gotten a little better. I drove into the city to give him a little rest on our way out.

Early in the evening, there weren’t many people there. But MasterDoc set us up in the little corner room in the back. Men would come in and out, hoping that we were up to something. We moved slowly, stopping to make out. I joked that we must be really boring to watch at that point.

He had me put my collar on and he took some time to stroke my face and tug on my hair, things that put me very quickly into sub mode. He slapped my face a few times and I wondered if someone was in the room to see, and if so what they thought about that.

I sucked his cock, and as usual I threw myself into it. I’m not one to leisurely tease when giving oral, I’m more likely to go right for the stimulation that will feel intense. He slid his fingers into my hair and I hoped he would force me down on his cock. He did, and when I’m that turned on it’s much easier to ignore the gag reflex. Eventually I had to come up for air.

He decided to humiliate me and made me lick his ass in public. He loudly encouraged me to get his tongue into his asshole and I felt terribly humiliated and debased. Funny thing is, since I’m so inexperienced with rimming I was apparently going a bit too high.

He had me strip, and lay down on the bed with my cunt facing the door. I was allowed a toy and I rubbed the vibrating nea on my clit. At moments, I got lost in working myself up, but at other times I’d get self-conscious and distracted. The first time MasterDoc asked me if I was ready to come I had to admit that I wasn’t, but this immediately brought my attention back to the task at hand. As I rubbed that vibrator on my clit I would moan and buck my hips sometimes. MasterDoc made me say loudly that I wanted him to fuck me. If I don’t say it loud enough, or thoroughly enough, the first time he says, “What was that?” until I ask for it satisfactorily loud.

He fucked me from behind quite hard. With his back out, it had been a week since we had actual intercourse. (I’m not complaining though, he kept me pretty damn happy in the interim.) I got lost in the sex and forgot to feel self-conscious about my moaning and grunting. My face was turned towards the door and we most assuredly had some sort of audience. He made me come really hard, and kept it going with his fingers as I squirted. Oh it felt so amazing that I didn’t want it to stop. I lay down for quite a while after that, recovering.

We took a break for beverages. Fucking is thirsty work. I walked to the bar by myself to get us drinks, and roughly three men hit on me as I walked alone. Sometimes the men feel like vultures in the swing club. I think the difficult part too is that they are used to, in a “normal” relationship, getting the woman’s attention and approval so they can move in and get some. However, in my D/s relationship with MasterDoc I rarely encourage the men (particularly if I’m not interested in them) – it’s up to MasterDoc to approve and decide who fucks me. Sitting back down, I asked MasterDoc if he’d ever been to a swing club alone. He hasn’t, and this didn’t surprise me at all. He says he did go to one swing party alone once, but that’s the sum of it. I have to confess that sometimes I think of the single men at swing clubs as kinda pathetic. They wander around, sometimes without pants (which, gentlemen, is not very attractive. Neither was the old guy shuffling along in boxers, socks and nothing else.) Sure I see attractive men there sometimes, but I kinda wonder why they’re there alone as well.

There was one hot guy who I gave a blatant “come hither” look to but he wandered away. Dissed! I told this to MasterDoc after the guy wandered away. He teased me for flirting with someone of my own accord, but of course I wasn’t in trouble for this. (I would just be in trouble if I went and did something with this guy without permission.) The door to the room with the large bed was closed and we asked around until we found out that Veronica, the lady who is notorious for squirting for the single guys was in there with someone. How unusual that she should seek privacy! We camped outside the door for a bit, seeking to tease her and get her attention when she came out.

When the large bed was available, we lay down on it. MasterDoc undid his pants and shirt and stroked his cock. I played with his chest and then I started feeling myself through my clothes. “Are you playing with yourself young lady?” he asked. I said yes and was glad he noticed as my hands were getting tired of the extra pressure I had to exert through my pants. MasterDoc took a vibrator to my crotch. He had me take my pants off and he teased me with a vibrator. A young-ish African American guy came in to watch. MasterDoc offered him the flashlight to hold and he came over to the bed. He stroked his cock as he held the flashlight really close to my pussy. They talked about me, MasterDoc most assuredly knowing that the objectification was making me hot. When I came, I squirted on the flashlight since it was so close, but I didn’t know until later because my eyes were clenched closed while I came.

I begged for orgasm at MasterDoc’s request and then a few moments later I was begging him to stop because I needed a break from the incessant orgasms. He has a knack for pushing me until I’m breathless. We cuddled and hung out a bit, and in no time I was I was really horny again wanting to be his slut. He threatened to get one of the older guys I thought was unattractive to fuck me. I felt squeamish, but when I started to frame it in my head as me being his slut and fucking whoever he wants, I got into the idea more. I didn’t want to see who I was fucking however, my idea of hot anonymous sex would be to get fucked like a bitch in heat while blindfolded, and as I walked around after I would have no idea what men I walked by had fucked me. MasterDoc’s version of this fantasy, however, is for random guys of his choosing to fuck me, and then he points out who it was after. Yikes! He really does get into humiliating me. Sad thing is, I get into it too.

We didn’t end up doing more, even though I was ravenously horny, thinking up naughty fantasies I wished would come true. We watched a very drunk woman demonstrate what it’s like to be a trainwreck. And then wandered into the bdsm room and MasterDoc got Veronica to squirt into his hands. Her come overflowed his hands and made a huge puddle on the floor. This girl can squirt on command. I’m impressed. You know you go to the swing club often when the resident slut knows who you are well enough to joke around with you. She got a towel to clean up and the men around us were in awe. The guy I had given the eye to earlier was there, and I was sure to put tidbits about my own squirting into the conversation. Hah, see what hotness you missed out on buddy!

We were there a while, and it feels like we must have done more than this, but I suppose a lot of time was spent hanging out with my brain in a fog of sexual fantasy. I’m going to miss MasterDoc while I’m away. But hopefully I will experience more stories to print here when I get back.

*********

Earlier in the day, I was complaining a bit too much and MasterDoc came back into the living room a few minutes later with my Njoy pure plug, lube and my collar. I was speechless. He had me get on hands and knees and he worked the plug into my ass, where it stayed for a while. He made me wiggle in my seat and asked me how it felt having the plug in there.

A little while later, he had me get the throe and magic wand and he used the wand to make me come very hard. He pressed the wand to the handle of the butt plug to make that vibrate. He teased my clit and I was desperate to come by the time he let me. He commented on how my complaining stopped after that. The man knows how to shut me up. And thankfully the methods are so much fun.