Beat Me til the Endorphins Flow

I’m enjoying a staycation this week, mostly knocking about the local area and crashing at MasterDoc’s. I thought I’d be home half the time, but I’ve ended up at MasterDoc’s more than I thought I would. I took myself out for afternoon tea today, and it was a lovely way to spend an hour (while reading). Today has been fairly relaxing. I’m going to do a little cleaning around MasterDoc’s, but nothing terribly taxing.
I had a hard time yesterday; Davey and I are having issues in our relationship and we had a difficult talk the night before. I don’t want to go into detail here, but I’m hoping we can work things out. Talking with MasterDoc and getting cuddles from him yesterday helped me get some focus on the issue. Plus, he gave me a beating I sorely needed.

Last night I was interviewed by The Oh Team for their online radio show. I’ve never been interviewed like that before but I had a good time and it was easy to talk since the topic was sex. Their podcasts are available free on iTunes, so be sure to give my episode a listen when it becomes available (8/17/09).  During the show, the hosts remarked that I should be spanked for having not listened to any of their shows before going on. I didn’t quite notice, since I was focusing on the interview at hand, but MasterDoc (who had been listening to the broadcast in the next room) ducked his head in and swung his hand back and forth, miming giving a spanking. Hee hee. I did point out to the hosts, however, that I was getting a beating that night from my Dom, if that made them feel any better.

So after the show, me and MasterDoc met up in the spare bedroom. He was feeling sorta cuddly at that moment so we cuddled for a bit, but he did manage to psych himself up for giving me a beating. I was definitely overdue for one – I’ve been out of sorts lately. The beating was fantastic – hands and floggers and the mean strap. He’d start out light, at a level where the beating is more like a massage, but then work up to something more intense, and the pain would start. He takes me into the pain zone, keeps me there a short while, and then backs off to a tolerable level. He’s very good at telling when I’m reaching my limit – I make noise when it hurts too much. Up and down the level of intensity goes until I’m in another place entirely – not only in my head, but I’m very much in my body as well. The outside world ceases to exist – it’s similar to meditation in that way.

He had me flip over and sit up, and he flogged my breasts and inner thighs. He snapped the flogger hard against my left nipple around three times, and the pain was something else. He took a moment, reminded me to breathe deeply, and then he flogged some more. It’s funny, when something really hurts I want it to stop, but then if he did stop, I think I’d be terribly disappointed.

He had me get back on hands and knees and beat me some more. I think I had fallen into the rhythm of the beating by this point, and mostly surrendered to whatever pain it brought me. He told me I could play with my cunt, so I did. I wasn’t sure if I could get my arousal up to a point where I could come, but then he prodded me, by telling me I could continue or stop. When given the choice I opted to continue – somehow his suggesting I stop suddenly turned me on to no end and I wanted to come. I rubbed my clit furiously with my right hand while supporting myself on my left arm. He beat me some more and the beating brought me even closer to orgasm. He gave me permission to masturbate to orgasm if I liked and hitting me just intensified rush of pleasure in my clit. The hitting helped me reach orgasm, and I was happily surprised to reach it that way, since I’m very much used to having a vibe on my clit and not using just my hand to get off. I stroked my clit feverishly as I came, I could feel my diva cup inside me as my vaginal muscles clenched around it. (I have my period.)

For once I didn’t keep going until he had to tell me to stop, I wound down slowly and brought my hand away from my clit. MasterDoc told me I could fall forward and I lay on my stomach, catching my breath and basking in the afterglow. He climbed into bed next to me, cuddled me, and I could feel the endorphins rushing through my veins. It was quite similar to taking a drug (like, say, ecstasy) and my mood was elevated and the feel of endorphins rushing around my body felt amazing. I wish everyone could understand how a beating can be soothing, invigorating, arousing and an act of love.

As an aside, at some point during the evening we commented on the idea of how I’ll be handy when MasterDoc is in his dotage and needs an adult diaper. Heh, I can’t remember exactly how we got on the subject, but it’s probably just as well I don’t share it. It dawned on me then, that a submissive would be more ready for such intimate care than, say, someone in a vanilla relationship. After all, in my vanilla relationship, if we use an anal toy, you wash it if it’s been in your ass. But in a D/s situation, the sub washes it regardless. After being so intimate as to wash your Dom’s anal toys, to massage his ass in great detail to help him get to orgasm, and even having had a bit of his poo on your finger after having it up his ass, you’re quite set to do something like change an adult diaper. While some vanillas do know their partner’s ass pretty intimately, I think that level is more likely to exist in a D/s relationship.

Today I have a small bruise on one ass cheek – it’s really a pity that I don’t bruise anymore. I think there’s also a small bruise on my inner thigh. But nothing like the colorful marks that were left when he first started beating me two years ago. (I still bruise easily on my arms and legs when I bump into things – I’m a total klutz – but my spanking zone doesn’t really bruise anymore.)