Monthly Archive for October, 2008

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Beating Depression

Published on October 12, 2008 in D/s, Uncategorized, anal, bdsm, depression, flogging, masochism, mental illness, orgasm denial, sex, spanking and submissive. 1 Comment

I’m prone to depression, have been since I was young. These days, I’m happy most of the time – I have the proper medication and feel on an even keel usually. But on Friday night I hit a rough patch and was severely depressed. I have no idea what brought it on but I had been feeling very anxious earlier in the day. It could be thanks to a change in medication, could just be hormonal. Whatever it was, I was seriously depressed. I spent the better part of two hours crying, not knowing why I was crying. I was a mess. MasterDoc hugged me and was wonderful to me, but he wasn’t feeling well himself so he wasn’t up to beating me. I know it sounds strange, but the two of us knew that was something that would turn my mood around. I got up the next morning and went to work, still feeling wretched.

I went back to MasterDoc’s that night after work and picked up some ice cream on the way. Yup, I was looking to self-medicate. Thankfully, MasterDoc felt better and he decided that we would spend the evening in and a beating would ensue since I was feeling so bad. We had ice cream, then dinner, then he had me put my collar on and get on my knees by a chair in the living room. He had me put the blindfold on and he sat in the chair in front of me. He put clothespins on my nipples and flicked the clothespins with his fingers. He had me bend over the chair. Using his hands and other implements he really beat on my ass. My pain tolerance was good and so the sensation mostly felt soothing and good. Yes, I know I’m a strange girl. It’s amazing how wonderful pain can make me feel. It’s counter-intuitive to react that way but it’s just how I am. He beat me for a while, even taking the heavy flogger to my upper back for a bit. It’s a bit like meditation to be beaten – you get into this other mental state, which is usually referred to as subspace. He was fairly rough with me, but I felt better and better as the beating went on.

He gave me the magic wand and had me use it on myself. I was so turned on from the beating. I kept pressing the vibrating wand into my clit. I asked for permission to come, but he didn’t let me right away. He kept beating me, sometimes it really hurt, but most of the time it was cathartic. My arousal grew as I continued to use the vibrator on myself. He finally gave me permission to come, and oh my god did I come hard and long. I felt like I could just keep coming forever. He gave me some lashes with the whip end of my slapper while I came – it’s really something else what I can take during orgasm. Pain that is usually too much is bearable somehow. Between the orgasm and the beating, I felt so much better afterwards. It’s like a miracle cure for my depression. I suppose it’s the endorphins that are released, but whatever it is, it works.

We hung out for a little while, watching tv and whatnot and he had me take my collar off. I felt subdued. A little while later he put some porn on we watched for a while. I felt entranced by the kinkiness going on. He told me to get myself warmed up, that he was going to fuck me. I used the little red vibrator on my clit and was hot and bothered again in no time. Despite not having the collar on, I felt like it was appropriate to call him Sir and so I did throughout the scene. We went to the bedroom and he fucked me while I lay on my back. I tried to hold off on asking for an orgasm, but eventually I gave in. He didn’t let me come then, and afterward he asked me to take even longer next time before asking permission. It’s so hard not to ask for permission, I get so incredibly worked up and on the verge of orgasm. Sometimes it feels like I won’t be able to hold back, but so far I’ve always managed to have enough self-control. I worry that someday I’ll slip. He finished fucking me and we cuddled a bit.

He had me lay on my side and he tried to enter me from behind. The angle wasn’t right so he said he guessed that he would just have to fuck me up the ass then. He had me lube up my ass to get it ready. It took some work to slide his cock in, the angle just wasn’t very good. I complained about the angle but he didn’t stop. It was uncomfortable, but his continuing on despite this got me so hot. I really do think I’m a bit wacko as pain can make me feel so good. In another context I’d have felt traumatized or violated, but with him I got wildly turned on and when he told me to come I came. Rowr. Very hot butt sex. Mind you, with someone else I might not have reacted so well. I think it makes a huge difference that I know he knows what he’s doing, and he wouldn’t truly hurt me – not in a bad way.

I snuggled up to his chest, but I was feeling really lusty so I started to caress his chest and lick it. He stroked his cock while I did this and I kept it up, feeling oh so passionate and sexual. He was breathing heavy and I did my best to make him feel good. When he came, he came all over my tummy. It was gooey. I was eager to take a shower at that point, but he said for that I would have to stay with his come on me. While it was gooey I was longing for a shower, but once it dried I kinda liked being a dirty girl with his come on me. In the end I slept with it on me and showered in the morning. Did I mention that by this point my depression was completely gone? I’m feeling much better, although I do feel like I could go for another beating. MasterDoc called me a greedy girl when I mentioned that.

HNT

Published on October 10, 2008 in Uncategorized. 4 Comments

This week’s HNT, a day late, leaves nothing to the imagination.

Review: Wahl 7-in-1

Published on October 6, 2008 in reviews and sex toys. 0 Comments

When I spotted the Wahl massager on the list of toys to review, I knew I had to give it a spin. It plugs into the wall like the Hitachi Magic Wand, and I wondered how it would compare. Let me just say that I love this toy!

It’s far quieter than the Magic Wand, but still very intense. I think the lower setting is a bit less intense than the Wand, which I’m glad for as sometimes the wand can be too intense for me. But the high setting is plenty intense. I immediately sought out the nubbly end to use on my clit. Davey and I played around with a couple of attachments – the cupped one working well on nipples, I later found out that the “knuckle joint massage” attachment works well on MasterDoc’s ass (for external stimulation), but my favorite was the “spot application massage” (aka the nubbly end, not to be confused with the “scalp massage” attachment, which I suppose could be called a nubbly end). Holding the spot application tip to my clit was amazing. The low setting packed a punch that battery-operated vibes can’t ever hope to have. I had an orgasm really quickly and it was intense! After I gave the Pleasure Tops a whirl (and Davey played with the Wahl on his balls and shaft, he said it felt good but wouldn’t get him off by itself), I went back to using the Wahl while Davey fucked me from behind. OMG. Did I mention that I love this toy? I came so hard. I got to use it again later at MasterDoc’s and again it made me come really, really hard. His former roommate Liz tried it on her hand and declared that she wanted to keep the toy. I was not going to part with this for anything! The Wahl has definitely secured a place in my list of favorite toys (with the bullet, Nea, Magic Wand and sybian). This massager rocks. And, you can use it for what it’s marketed as being for – a massager for sore muscles.

Review: Pleasure Tops

Published on October 6, 2008 in reviews and sex toys. 0 Comments

When Babeland sent out their weekly list of toys to review, I was intrigued by two of them. The first one, Pleasure Tops, was just too funny-looking not to review. An odd, cone shape, with a thumb-shaped appendage, it was like no sex toy I had ever used before. I was happy when the toy arrived and the box said “phthalate-free,” as phthalates have become a health concern in sex toys. The toy is also waterproof. It contains two internal bullet vibes, one in the top of the cone and the other in the “thumb.” You twist the base to turn it on and vary the speed of vibration.

I tested out the new toys with Davey on Sunday. I started with the Wahl massager (see separate review) and had an orgasm from that. So, I was all primed to try out the toy I thought would pack a far smaller punch than the Wahl – the Pleasure Tops. Now the box says that you can use the cone for either vaginal or anal penetration and the “thumb” for clitroral or scrotal stimulation. I tried kneeling over the toy, as you’re supposed to sit on it, but the toy is way too small to reach your cunt from a kneeling position. I was hesitant to sit directly onto something cone-shaped, so I lay back and inserted it into my cunt. When outside your body, the toy seems to have good, strong vibration. However once it presses into/against you, the intensity goes way down. It felt nice to have the Pleasure Tops in me, spreading me wide, and the “thumb” on my clit, but there was no way I was going to orgasm from the sensation. I declared the toy a bit of a dud.

Later that day, I went to MasterDoc’s and his former roomate, Liz, was there and she was eager to try out my new toys. She took Pleasure Tops into another room and sat on a firm chair. She agreed that it wouldn’t get her off, and she thought it was lame how you’d have to swivel your body to turn the vibe up or down while you’re sitting on it. Sitting did allow her to lean forward into the “thumb” which seems to be the way the toy was intended to be used. She agreed that while it felt good, it wasn’t going to do the job.

Later, when MasterDoc and I went off into the bedroom, Liz grabbed the toy again and gave it another whirl. This time she did like I did, and lay back, inserting the toy into her vagina. She said that this time she enjoyed it much more and changed her opinion of it. All in all, we agree that it feels nice, but there’s design flaws (the controls, the cone doesn’t hit your g-spot at all). I can’t give it a ringing endorsement, but if you like feeling like you’re getting progressively spread open then this may just be the toy for you with its wide base.

Sunday Evening Fuck

Published on October 6, 2008 in D/s, best sex bloggers, cunt and sex. 0 Comments

I’m overdue for putting original content on Best Sex Bloggers. So you’ll have to go there to read about what MasterDoc and I got up to last night.

Lazy Afternoon

Published on October 5, 2008 in Uncategorized. 2 Comments

This afternoon MasterDoc and I were cuddling when he said that he was feeling like having sex, but he was also feeling lazy. He said he felt bad because I was overdue for some good foreplay but he was just too tired. (I know all you non-Dom types are like, “What? He can slack off on foreplay?” Yup, one of the perks of being a Dom. Not that I’m complaining, as he certainly keeps me happy.) His cock was hard, but he was sleepy. He joked that I could do all the work. I was bummed because I was in the mood for more sex, but I was feeling kinda lazy as well. I played with his cock and it was very enticing. I finally decided that I should grab the little red vibrator laying on the bed and get myself warmed up. I used one hand to stroke his cock and one hand to rub the vibrator against my clit. I was a little bummed to be doing all the work, but I was also a woman who wanted to get laid. I got really worked up with the vibe and I could have made myself come if I had permission. I decided that I was going to follow through on my plans to fuck him, however. I got up, got a condom, put it on, used a little lube on myself and got on top.

I rode him for all I was worth. I could feel him press his hips up towards me. I rocked back and forth, taking his cock inside me, getting it in deep. I grunted and moaned, heading more and more towards orgasm. I rode him for a while and I asked for permission to come. He teased me for just a moment before granting permission. I had such an amazing orgasm. Being on top helped keep his cock in me (for a while). I fell forward onto him, spasming. I could barely keep riding him as I came. The combination of him telling me to come and me fucking him combined to push me over the edge.

I was breathless and thirsty afterwards. I was a happy girl. We continued to cuddle in bed for a while and he said that he’d like to fuck some more. Yipee! This time, I was feeling lazy so he told me to get my ass up on a pillow and lie on the bed. He got on top and fucked me slowly. I clutched onto his upper arms and closed my eyes. Without a lot of fast thrusting I wasn’t going to be able to come, but still it felt amazing to have him slide his cock so slowly into me and then out of me. He’d quicken the pace for a moment and I’d be breathing hard in his ear. Just before he stopped, he licked up the side of my neck. *shivvers* I’m often so orgasm-centric but I really enjoyed just being fucked.

As we talked and cuddled afterward, he mentioned again the idea of how he’ll introduce me to piss play – when I’m a good girl he’ll use it as “reward.” Yeah. The first time he mentioned it I told him he should be careful, it might backfire and cause me to never want to behave well. But today I had to admit that while I’m not crazy about the idea, and it’s not my idea of reward, I sometimes think I won’t be all that freaked by it. Now, when he mentions me drinking piss, yeah I think I’ll be freaked out by it. But it does come down to me wanting to please him. Still, some ideas are hard to get your head around.

Catching Up

Published on October 4, 2008 in D/s, anal, blow jobs, exhibitionism, orgasm denial, sex, slut and swinging. 2 Comments

Hi all. I’ve been quiet this week because it’s been a busy week. I’ve been kept busy at work, and I’ve spent a few nights at MasterDoc’s and away from my computer. That doesn’t mean I haven’t had some fun, however. Tuesday night was a quiet night with MasterDoc - we do have evenings of just hanging out from time to time. Wednesday night we got naked and had some fun. I really should blog things right after they happen because details quickly become fuzzy.

He used a variety of toys on me, getting me worked up. I was hoping he’d try the archer wand, but that ended up saved for Friday night. Like I said, the details of Wednesday night are a bit fuzzy. I gave him a hand job for a while (surprisingly I didn’t go down on him at all that night, which is highly unusual). I’m pleased to say my handjob skills seem to be generally improving. It’s amazing what a few bits of direction from a Dom can do for your know-how. He fucked me, and kept me right on the edge for quite a while, or at least it felt like quite a while. When he finally allowed me to come, I came, but not as hard as I would have if he had given me permission right at the peak of my arousal. He seemed disappointed that he missed the peak, as he knows my body so well.

He had me play with this cock and ass, and had me insert a toy into him for the very first time (very first time with me, that is). It was a wand that’s curved, so it worked well to hit his prostrate on the inside. It’s fun to watch the expressions on a man’s face as he gets off. I commented a couple of weeks ago about how it’s fun to watch a woman, but I really do enjoy watching a man as well. We kept playing until he came. (Actually I kept going with the toy even after, as I’ve learned that he doesn’t want stimulation to suddenly end when he’s come, but rather to continue a little after. I keep going until he tells me to stop.)

Last night, we went out to a swing club. It was really dead when we got there, so it was a while before we got down to playing. We took some time for cuddles. (Yes, this is probably disappointing to the people who wander into the room hoping to see sex, and there we are, fully clothed, cuddling. I needed some cuddles last night though.) I had a couple of drinks and felt generally better after the cuddling and the drinks. (I had been feeling kinda down.)

After things began to pick up, we went to the back room where we had cuddled, and MasterDoc had me suck his cock. I got it nice and hard and he told me to sit back so he could reach my cunt. I used the nea on my clit while he played around with me. He had a guy (one who I had fucked before but didn’t immediately recognize. Oh yes, I’m a big slut!) play with my tits in the meanwhile. Then he used the archer wand on me. Rowr. I think it’s even more fun when someone else is using it on you. I find that with penetration play I enjoy it more when someone else is doing the playing, whereas with clit play I prefer doing it myself much of the time. The big, bulbous end of the wand nudged against my g-spot. I so wanted to come. I was a horny mass of sluttiness at that point. So when he asked me if I wanted to get fucked, really wanted it, I just had to moan out that yes, yes, I really wanted to get fucked.

He put me on hands and knees and fucked me from behind. We had a nice audience by this time. He had me use a vibe on my clit while he fucked me. I was really turned on and moaning and crying out, “Oh fuck!” I begged for permission to come and each time he said, “Not yet.” I was a very eager, horny slut at that point. I like being at a club because I can be loud about my enjoyment. I can moan and cry out and scream. After a while of fucking, I asked for permission again, no I begged for permission, and he gave it to me. I came hard, but didn’t manage to push his cock out, which was a nice change of pace. He had it thrust deep inside me when he gave me permission to come. The orgasm rocked my body and I screamed out how good it felt. He would grab my hair every so often. I think the audience had a nice show.

He let me lay down to rest, and I caught my breath. By this time I was laying on my back, and the guy who fucked me before offered to work his fingers in me again (I remembered who he was when it was mentioned he was the guy with magic fingers.) and MasterDoc allowed him to do so. I was laying on my back, and a crowd filled the small room. The guy would finger me deep, hitting my g-spot while MasterDoc applied pressure on the outside. I asked for permission to come at will and was given it. I came really hard, really loudly, over and over again. Next, MasterDoc took over with his fingers inside me and the other guy pressed down by my pubic bone. They took their turns playing with me and it was heavenly.

MasterDoc asked if I was ready to be fucked again. I was quite ready. He had me get on top this time and I rode his cock, rocking back and forth. I love the feel of his cock inside me. I was a little tired, but my enthusiasm gave me the wherewithal to keep fucking him until he had decided it was enough. We relaxed for a bit and the crowd dispersed a little. Soon some other people were fooling around in the corner of the room, and it was getting crowded in there again, so MasterDoc had us get dressed and we prepared to leave.

All-in-all it was a terrific night. We headed home around 1:30, so it was relatively early, but I was feeling quite satisfied. (Oh, I nearly forgot to mention, he gave me a little bit of a flogging as I held onto the chains hanging from the St. Andrew’s Cross in the bdsm room. He had let me pack what toys I wanted last night, and I left out anything stingy but I knew I would like the thuddyness of the big flogger.)