Over at BDSM is Love Luna posts a BDSM related question on Thursdays. This week’s sounded like something I would like to write about: “What was your first D/s experience like?” I still have fond, fuzzy memories of my first D/s type experience. I was eighteen and seeing my first boyfriend (first kiss, first sex, first oral sex, first D/s type play – he was my first in many ways) and we would fool around in my parents’ basement after everyone had gone to bed. (He lived just far enough away that my parents would let him sleep over on the sofa bed in the basement. He wasn’t allowed in my room, boys in my room didn’t happen until after I went to college. Didn’t stop us from fooling around all the time, however.)
We were both fond of thinking up fantasy scenarios to act out together. We were both really horny and the sex was the only really good part of the relationship. He was a manipulative, possessive, compulsive liar who suffered from depression, but, he could make me have my first multiple orgasms. The relationship lasted about two years, until I went to college, discovered self-esteem and got fed up with his possessiveness.
So we’d act out fantasies, since we were confined to my car for a lot of fooling around we’d do the chauffeur/ rich person who seduces the chauffeur fantasy a lot, taking turns. We pretended to be complete strangers who met at a bar and went home and fucked. We would take turns pretending to be someone completely innocent being seduced by the other – a lot of power differentials there. And one night, we pretended that I was the maid, and he was the employer who won’t let her leave one night, and takes her forcibly despite her protests. Of course ultimately she loves it, but she fights it every step of the way. Ok so it’s not a strict D/s power exchange scene, but boy did I get excited at him taking control. I remember being wildly turned on that night, and would ask him to act that out again. The unfortunate thing was (and it was the unfortunate thing in many of my relationships to come) he would rather be the one being taken. *sigh* He did a pretty good job being in control but he preferred the other end.
I also did my first attempts at bondage with him, and I think we tried a little bit of spanking. We just kept brainstorming things to try. We were determined to do most everything. (I didn’t try anal til much later though.) *sigh* Despite the dysfunction of the relationship, there’s something about being a horny teenager that makes me wistful. Everything was new and I wanted to try nearly all of it. I remember being really into oral sex with him, but not so much intercourse. I discovered later that he wasn’t particularly big when I went on to experience other penises. But I had nothing to compare it to at the time. He could make me come and keep coming with his fingers and tongue, but I only discovered squirting for the first time about three or four years ago. I did, however, manage to orgasm from sex the third or so time we did it, which seems impressive to me considering there are women who can’t come from intercourse at all. I remember thinking that, wow, at 18/19 I was a long way away from my “sexual peak” as a woman, but I was coming a whole hell of a lot and having a terrific time of it. I’m glad that I’ve gone on to bigger and better things, but I have fond thoughts of my first sexual experiences.
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