I won’t be seeing much of MasterDoc for a week or two, so I won’t have any new exciting stories to share. But I will endeavor to have some mildly interesting content here nonetheless. I started an entry the other day but it just meandered so I canned it. I might revisit some of it here but we shall see.
Last night I had a good time with Davey. We went out to dinner with a gay coworker of his, and then went bar hopping at gay bars. I haven’t done the fag hag thing in ages and had a good time of it. We all got really drunk. We shocked his coworker with stories of our lives and what we get up to. Hopefully he’s a discreet sort. (Hey, he’s in an open relationship with his boyfriend as well.) He asked at one point if we’ve ever done BDSM and of course I had to say that yes, I have. He guessed I was Dominant, which is pretty funny if you know me well. I get mistaken for a Domme pretty often when the topic comes up. I admitted that no, I’m a submissive and a bit of a masochist. I ended up talking about MasterDoc a little bit.
It was funny when he asked me what it is I see in women. As a gay man he’s just totally not turned on by women, but he took advantage of me being bi to ask about it. It’s hard to say. I like their softness and curves. I like how gently they kiss, it feels different than men. He asked if I was into going down on women, and I had to admit I’m a bit lukewarm about it. I’ve done it, and sometimes enjoyed myself, but mostly I’d rather finger. He talked about how he’s more into rimming than blow jobs and I said I’m the exact opposite. *grin* It was an interesting night.
The train ride home with Davey was interesting – the two of us drunk out of our minds. I brought up the blog topic I had thought about writing about this week – me being a pillow princess. MasterDoc has commented on this (see an earlier blog entry for his comment). Davey in his very honest, open drunk state implied that yes, I can be a pillow princess. lol
So the good question is what’s up with that? It’s not like I don’t enjoy giving others pleasure, I just tend to focus more on my own orgasm. I focus more on receiving sensation than giving it. But since I’ve now been told twice that I’m a little bit selfish I think I’ll focus more on giving. I need to learn to find the pleasure in making someone come. Well actually, I do get the pleasure of that. I think the more involved I am with what’s going on the more of a turn on it is for me. When MasterDoc has had me use the magic wand on his ass while he jerked off, I felt pretty removed from what was going on – until I started licking his chest and I felt much more involved and found the whole situation really hot. When I’m sucking cock I’m into it and enjoying it. I guess I have to focus on how I can keep myself engaged when it’s not my orgasm we’re talking about. Something to work on. So, no, I’m not the sex goddess I make myself out to be. I’ve got some rough edges that need smoothing. I could sit here and analyze my childhood to explain why I’m sorta selfish but I’ll spare you the details. Point is I need to get over it.
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